We can Begin the World all Over Again
by Summer Leigh Wind
Summary: If anyone can figure out what's happened it's Severus Snape and if he doesn't remember like her; then, well, maybe Lily can save him from the dark once and for all. AU Post/Pre-Hogwarts, pairings up in the air. Formerly named "A Second Go"
1. A Second Go

_**A Second Go**_

* * *

A chilling scream jolts Narcissa Black from her lilac sheets and leads her out of her room and down a familiar wing of her childhood home to a bedroom at the very end of the hall. In the pitch black, she sees Bellatrix stark white against her black sheets. Drinking in the strange sight, Narcissca realizes with no small ounce of awe that her sister is all supple skin and delicate points; she looks-young-and it makes Narcissca's breath catch. Yet, she is not the first to speak, a patter of feet comes from behind and she turns just in time to see her older sister, Andromeda's wide eyes.

"No..." Her sister mutters and Narcissa can't help but feel the same dread.

"Andy?" Narcissa murmurs, gazing up at her sister's rigid features and rich black hair.

"No...this can't be happening." Andromeda moans; falling back, she shouts out. "Teddy?" When this Teddy doesn't answer her, she cries out more shrilly. "My grandson where are you!"

Narcissa's sister's unusually lucid eyes spark with a quickness she had rarely-if ever-associated with Bellatrix. "Stop her." The teenager orders. Narcissa stays frozen to her spot, eyes moving back and forth between each sister. Abruptly, Bellatrix's ruby lips pull back in a feral snarl. "Do you want mother and father to come?" She demands.

Narcissa's eyes go wide and then gathering up her virgin white gown, tackles Andromeda to the floor successfully smothering her mouth in the attack. Andromeda gives a muffled screech and fights her, but Bellatrix surprisingly comes to her aid and takes over keeping Andromeda covered. When she becomes a tad too rough in Narcissca's opinion of quieting Andy, Narcissca pushes her white-clad shoulders and shouts. "Cut it out! Don't _kill_ her!"

Bellatrix backs off instantly, eyes flashing fretfully. "I don't want to kill anyone." She whispers.

"You already have!" Andromeda bites pushing herself up on her elbows.

The thin girl falls back from her two sisters and curls into herself, hands gripping her head in a tight hold. "I-I didn't want to, he said-"She sobs then and Narcissa finds herself more scared than she ever thought possible, (she had not felt such fear even when she had walked to the gallows).

"Bellatrix?" Narcissa implores, laying a dainty hand on the bony shoulder.

"Don't feel sympathy for her! She's a monster!" Andromeda yells; making to yank the smaller girl from the other.

Narcissa dances out of the way and places one hand on her non-existent hip, while keeping the other on her elder sister's shoulder. "So? She's family," she hisses.

"She's killed-" The older girls starts, but Narcissa is quick to cut in.

"So have I" she says firmly.

Andromeda stumbles back and gazes at the young blond with hurt eyes. "How could you? I thought-"

"What? I'd stay innocent and pure in war?" She demands, narrowing her eyes dangerously. "It's war Andy. _Y__ou _may not have blood on _your_ hands, but what else can't you expect from a _coward _who shirks away from battle?" She says disdainfully.

The brunette girl flushes angrily and points a finger at the other girl. "You _know _that's not true I do _not _hide! I had people to protect, my daughter, my grandson!" She argues.

"Yeah? I had a _son_ you know, that did not keep _me_ from _fighting_." Narcissa sniffs.

Andromeda balls her hands into fist and opens her mouth to scream at her sister when Bellatrix breaks in. "Stop." She orders. Looking up at them with a determined gleam she says to the two. "We will be divided no longer, I will not watch us fall apart a second time." She tells them.

Andromeda crosses her arms and glares at her older sister. "Really? How are you going to stop that? You went _insane_" she sneers.

Bellatrix gives a twisted little smile with a reminiscent taste of madness. "Yes, I admit that I did. This time, though, I'm not a naïve nor do I believe he can harm you. I will not be _his _puppet any longer." She declares.

Narcissa tackles her oldest sister with a hug. "Oh do you mean it? I shall love you for always if you do." She gushes, all smiles and hope. The elder smirks at the child cusping adolescence and squeezes her back.

"I do." She answers and with a wary, but wistful gaze Andromeda falls beside her sister in a ploom of white fabric.

"You better." She warns Bellatrix, but her doubt does not stop her from hugging her sister for all she is worth. Maybe, just maybe, the three sisters think they can survive this war in tact as a _family_.

* * *

Just shy of midnight and not unlike his cousin, Sirius Black awakens panting; with frantic fingers he runs them across his body relieved to find it whole, if only smaller. It's certainly better than what he expected after falling into the veil; some of the tension drains out of him in that moment, but is quickly returned at the sound of a terrified shriek. Without a thought, Sirius bolts from his room and to one he remembers from his childhood. Entering the room, he finds his baby brother up in his adult bed, looking utterly disproportionate to his room.

Stormy eyes wide and glossy the child stares at him. "Siri." His brothers utters, face crumpling.

Sirius stares. "What is with all the racket!?" An angry, but sleepy voice snaps from the doorway. Twisting around, Sirius finds his mother and father in their dressing robes, hair mused and faces irritated, but not awake enough to feel truly furious. Glancing between the two, Sirius lifts his chin in defiance and takes a step towards them.

"Sorry, I thought I'd play a prank on Reg; he didn't take to it too well." He apologizes petulantly.

His father's eyes flash and a hand comes out knocking Sirius to the ground. "You insipid child!" He snarls, "If this ever happens again you can expect more than a slap!" He shouts.

Sirius stares down at the ground and grounds out between clenched teeth. "Yessir."

The man huffs and putting a hand on his mother's arm orders. "Go back to bed, don't expect the elves to give you breakfast this morning." And with that the pair leave.

"You lied." Regulus quietly states.

Flopping his head back to get an upside down image of his brother, Sirius sneers. "Yes, well, we know how much they like your _bedwetting_." Regulus flushes and blinks back ashamed tears. Sirius struggles to his feet in the silence, coming closer to his brother he hesitates. "...Did you wet the bed?" He implores.

Hot tears run down his cheeks as Regulus shakes with unsounding sobs. "I-I haven't wet the bed in _years_ and _now_...!" He whimpers.

"Aw shit, I didn't-Alright, c'mon get up." Sirius sighs padding over to his little brother and tugging at the sleeves of his pajama top. Regulus reluctantly allows his older brother to pull him from his bed and strip him of his wet clothes.

"Why are you being so nice?" He sniffs, shivering a bit at the draft coursing through the house.

Sirius looks back with sympathy and hope in his expressive eyes. "Years, huh?" He murmurs.

Regulus flushes, but after a pause nods his head. "Uh-huh."

His brother's eyes cloud with tears and pulls Regulus against him in a brief hug. "I'm sorry, _so sorry_." He apologizes.

Regulus averts his gaze to stare at his tiny bare toes and mumbles. "S'okay, I understand now; _he _is _evil_." Sirius nods his head in agreement and the pulls away to bring out a pair of new sleep clothes for Regulus from his armour.

"Yeah," His brother exhales. "Put these on." Regulus does as he's told, while Sirius tosses his old pajamas on to Regulus's soiled bed.

"Kreacher?" Reg calls out uncertainly.

With a pop, the elf appears in front of the two children. "Yes little masters?" He inquires, hands folded in front of him.

Blushing, Regulus stammers. "I, um, I kinda wetthebed."

The elf nods sagely. "Kreacher will take cares of it." He agrees and before Regulus can get in another word his brother's hand grasps his.

"Reg's gonna sleep with me for the rest of the night, don't tell mother and father okay?" He tells the elf, hoping for once he will heed him.

Kreacher gives Sirius a suspicious look, but tilts his head in acknowledgement. The two brothers then leave the bedroom and return to Sirius's still warm bed, they crawl in it and fall into exhausted sleep in the bright shine of the full moon.

* * *

Different from any other, Lucius Malfoy does not make a sound as his eyes open to darkness of the dead of night. He gazes up at the canopy of his bed-a reflection of the night sky-something he'd not had since he was a student at Hogwarts. A cold feeling washing through him, Lucius slowly curls into a ball and sobs. He finds himself relieved, terrified, angry, sad and _so so __disappointed_. For all his money, for all his fight, he had not been able to save himself or his wife from the aftermath of the war. He and Narcissa have been tried and executed for their Death-eater status and forced to leave their son without guidance or solace. If there was any silver-lining, it was that the Malfoy fortune was intact as was their boy.

Crying into his silken sheets Lucius vows for everything to be different this time around, he will not allow his father to die thinking Lucius hated him, he would not let Narcissa doubt his love or decisions and he would _not _become a _Death-eater. _Crawling out from under his sheets, Lucius pulls on a dressing gown and a pair of well-worn slippers before whispering down the long hall to his father's room. Coming to the tall mahogany doors, Lucius pushes them open to find his father sitting up in bed his face ashen jaw tight with pain.

"Father?" Lucius calls. In the moon's glow of early hour, the man's eyes open to reveal blue dulled by pain, yet a tiny smile rises on his lips. With great strength, the man's hand manages to reach out to his son and he beckons to him with a spastic jerk.

"Lucius." He rasps. "Come, what's woken you at this hour?" He implores. Lucius takes several halting steps to his father's bedside before gingerly sitting down on the edge of the mused covers. The man's eyes alight with a bit of life and his out stretched hand comes to rest on Lucius's own hand before his eyes focused in on his son.

"Father." Lucius begins. The man waits with a patience learned by those who only have one thing left to wait for, death. Swallowing back a whimper, He murmurs. "I'm sorry."

The senior Malfoy frowns. "What for my son?"

"For-for _everything._" Lucius whispers and without a second thought buries his face into his father's lap and cries. It's a short while after he finishes his snivelling that he comes to realize his father's fingers are running through his fine flaxen hair. "Father...stop, you're causing yourself pain." Lucius mumbles pulling away from the fingers and gazing at the man in shock and worry.

His father smiles. "You're my son, I'm meant to comfort you." He answers.

Lucius gives a rage-filled scowl. "_Not when it causes you pain!_" He hisses.

"Most everything causes me pain these day, child." His father sighs tiredly.

Lucius grits his teeth and growls. "They call themselves light, but look what they do; they curse a man with a painfully slow death."

Lucius's father's face softens to sorrow and he grabs hold of Lucius's own. "It was an accident, misfires happen sometimes."

"In the middle of a nearly empty street? With his wand pointed directly at you?" Lucius counters.

His father almost shakes his head, but winces in the end. "I've made more than one enemy in my time, and caused many more to dislike me; yet I will not blame him. I am just as much at fault as he." He tells his son.

Lucius can't hold back anymore tears and clings to the hand that holds his own. "I don't want you to die." He whispers.

His father smiles at him and says. "All of us must someday. I'm just a bit earlier than expected."

"Dad..." Lucius hiccups.

"Please don't cry, it reminds too much of your mother." He begs, his frail hand squeezing Lucius's fingers tightly.

"Please daddy, don't leave me." Lucius pleads.

"Be strong and remember, keep my death a secret. It's terrible enough that one father is about to be robbed from his son, let's not make it two." He explains.

"I will dad." Lucius agrees.

With a last smile, the older Malfoy leans in a plants a papery kiss to his sons cheek and relaxes back against his pillows. "You remind me so much of your mother..." He mutters and with a final breath, Abbrax Malfoy passes away. Lucius doesn't leave his side till the sun has replaced the moon high in the sky and his father's gaunt hand is stiff and unyielding in his grasp.

* * *

In the mid hours between midnight and morn is when James Potter wakes a cry of anguish sounding from him. He wails and sobs, never one to hide what he feels from anyone; much less himself. Mother and father come rushing into his room, dad swooping him out of his gold and red sheets frantic hands running up and down the length of his young body as mum presses her cool hands to his flushed face begging for him to tell her what's upset her baby so.

James flinches and whimpers from the attention, only one thought in mind; _His family. _He died, he left them to fend for themselves, _he left them to die_! He can't tell this to his mother and he can't tell this to his father; he can't tell them how awful he feels for leaving behind his wife to defend his infant son, how terrible he feels for _failing_. James doesn't deserve such lavished attention, he's a failure.

"Love can't you tell mummy what's wrong? _Please _sweetheart!" His mother sniffles taking him from his father's capable arms and into her own gentle hold cradling him to the nape of her neck soothing his sweat soaked mop and humming a wavering tune. The boy is so very confounded, but he doesn't question the situation he's found himself in. Instead, after a minute of rigid uncomfortableness, he melts and winds his skinny arms around his mother and begins to cry in earnest.

"Mum, _mummy._" He hiccups.

"Oh _darling_." His mother chokes swaying with him in her arms. "Why won't you tell me what's upset you so?" She sniffles. James shakes his head and continue to wail hot and wet into her front, his fingers scrabbling to find a hold that will bring her closer. Suddenly, arms wrap around his middle and James _screeches_; causing the hands that are attempting to grasp him falter and in turn almost drop him. The hands strengthen their grasp and with one final tug pull him from his mother.

"_Mummy_!" James shrieks grabbing for her with beseeching eyes.

"James." His father's voice grunts gruffly. The boy ignores him in favor of blubbering and squirming in the hold of his captor. "Goddamnit James! Look at me!" He shouts and James goes rigid his little head tilting to look up at his captor to find it is his father.

"Dad?" His snuffles.

His father sighs and brings him against his chest. "Want to sleep with us tonight son?" He sighs.

"John-" His mother begins when his father holds up a hand.

"Not now Jenna." He growls and at his mother's stricken look says softer, calmer, "We can all have a nice long chat after breakfast tomorrow. Okay?" She nods numbly and together the trio heads off to his parents room. Entering the room, his father takes him to the mused bed and lays him down in the middle tucking him in. "Sleep tight Jamie." He murmurs pulling the silk sheets over his body as his mother does the same.

"Night dad, mum." James whispers and in his spot stays perfectly still until both of them are breathing deeply. After he is certain they are both far enough gone into sleep, James tosses until he's free of the quilts and can stare at his body in the receding moonlight; he is unfinished limbs and soft edges. Face scrunched in a mixture of perplexment and misery he mumbles to nobody. "What's going on?"

* * *

Remus blinks; his body wracked with the leftover pangs familiar to his transformations, but he cannot riddle out why that is. He and Tonks had just rushed head long into battle curses flying from their wands and curses flying straight at them, he vaguely remembers a streak of green shooting towards him when everything went black...

"Remus?" A voice from across the room whispers, a warm ball of light giving away their location.

A ripple of wind whistles into the dark room causing him to shiver and the light dances, teetering towards extinction. "Hm?" He grunts struggling to pull himself up with clumsy, weak arms.

The person breathes a sigh and shuffles into the room. "Do you need help?" They ask and then the flame lifts up to their face and the werewolf has to hold back a gasp at the shadowed contours. _It's mother. _His mind whispers, but it can't be so; she's been dead for years and years.

"Mummy?" He mutters, voice wavering between confusion and pain.

"It's alright my boy, I can help." She says to him setting her lantern aside. She kneels beside him and pulls a pair of pajamas from her cloak. She holds out the shirt and commands. "Come here child." Remus listens and allows her put his arms through the child length sleeves and finds himself surprised when it fits. She then helps him up on his coltish legs and into his bottoms before picking Remus up and letting the young werewolf to cling to her as she puts a hand in front of the lantern to keep the wind from extinguishing it.

In the morning dusk, they tromp across the patchy lawn he remembers from his childhood and into the homey kitchen colored yellow with splashes of orange. Taking him to the chipped and creaky kitchen table, she sets him in a chair and glides over to the cupboard above the sink pulling out several potions and next to the fridge where she takes out a jug of chocolate milk. Swinging over to him, his mothers wispy blond hair plasters itself to her face as she puffs out a breath of air. "Here baby, take the potions while I get you a cuppa." She tells him and moves away to reach into the drying rack by the sink to bring up a washed cup for him. Remus ignores the potions in favor of staring at her in wonder; _she's alive, _in all her wispiness and early lines that mar her forehead far too soon.

When mother turns to find that he hasn't taken the medicine like ordered she puts the glass down. Her brow's creases deepen further in worry and she kneels in front of Remus, holding up a finger. "Darling, how many fingers am I holding up?" She whispers.

The boy frowns. "Why-oh. I haven't got a concussion mum." He sighs and to dispel her unneccessary fears takes the potion and chugs them down one by one under her careful gaze. Slamming the last bottle to the table, he wipes away the grimace and smile up at her. "See mum?" Remus prompts.

She bites her lip and pours him a tall glass of chocolate milk. "I see." She agrees.

Knowing his mother is still unconvinced, Remus's shoulders drop. "It's-It's just a bit disorienting sometimes, okay?" He explains.

His mother's brows raise a bit in surprise and then she chuckles. "Disorienting? Where did my big man learn this word?"

Remus glows red and sips at his milk. "A book. I think." He mutters around his drink. Mother laughs again and her skin crinkles around her eyes in a way that is far too rare in the Lupin household, Remus finds himself giggling soon after. In a moment of silliness, mother's eyes alight and in a sudden swoop her fingers are tickling beneath his arms. Remus squirms and squeals while his mother laughs joyful, as they enjoy themselves Remus vows to himself; _This time you'll be happy, I'll make sure of it._

* * *

In a pastel room dimmed by coming morning, a little girl with a head of fire laid upon a bed of white frills and lace tosses. Her relaxed face furrows and tears start to leak from underneath her dark lashes as her features twist into a horrifying mix agony and terror. Suddenly, her body turns rigid; a breath later, like an arrow leaving its quiver the girl springs up from her bed a deafening scream unleashed from her rosebud lips.

At first, Lily hasn't a clue what's going on. All she knows is she's in her childhood bedroom, stuffed animals and books of fairy tales lining all available surfaces and her _mother's _arms engulf her entirely as she wails and screams. "Mum, mum, _mummy_." She sobs into the soft curves as her fingers entwine in the woman's linen nightgown.

"Shhh..."Her mother soothes, petting her tangled hair and peppering kisses on her crown. "What's got you so worked up, hm?" Even admits the confusion, pain, anger, worry and sorrow Lily knows she cannot tell her mother anything. Not a sliver of the truth can leave her lips or she risks much more than she could ever regain.

Instead, she hiccups and gazes up at her mother's tired, yet concerned face and whimpers. "Mummy it-t was _the worst night-tmare ever_! I-I-everyone was _dead!_" she cries.

"Oh sweetheart..."Her mother sighs, squeezing her close and kissing her forehead. "It's just a dream, it's all over now."

Lily wants to call her a liar, tell her she's wrong; but she can't. So Lily does the next best thing, "Can I sleep with you and daddy for the rest of the night?"

Her mother smiles and scoops Lily up with a great heave. "Just tonight love." She says and Lily only clings tighter.

"Okay." She murmurs. Mother and daughter fall silent as they shuffle into her mother and father's bedroom, Lily sees her father turn over in her parents' bed and gaze over at them with slitted eyes.

"Everything alright?" He mumbles.

Lily feels her mother smile against her hair. "Yes, just a nightmare Paul. I told Lily she could sleep with us for the rest of the night."

Lily's father snorts. "All of two hours." And then with a groan tosses himself over making room for Lily to curl up in the middle. Her mother sets Lily down and she scrambles under the sheets as her mother slips in beside her.

"Night mummy and daddy." She mutters closing her eyes.

"Goodnight baby." Daddy says and the room descends into silence, Lily gazes up at the ceiling as her parents sleep on either side of her. She doesn't know what's happened or if this is a dream or if it's not; at this point Lily would be willing to bet her entire life from the moment of learning the truth of magic to her death trying to save her only son was all just a terrifyingly wonderful dream. With a frustrated sigh, she tries to think of someone she could go to and with sinking stomach and stab of guilt she remembers a little boy she once called her best friend.

Adrenaline running low, Lily thinks with a bit of trepidation if anyone can figure out what's happened it's Severus Snape and if he doesn't remember like her; then, well, maybe she can save him from the dark once and for all.

* * *

In a parallel scene only streets away from the little girl, a little boy with eyes of the night sky startles awakes to the enclosing sunrise with a strained gasp leaving his parted mouth. Severus Snape sits up and his hand comes to clamp his whole neck, he releases a shaky exhale of relief at the finding. Eyes darting about the sparse gray room he tries to puzzle out just where he is. In a matter of seconds, fear funnels into his gut as he realizes he's back at Spinner's End in his childhood bedroom. With gasping breaths he waits for the sound of creaking floors and lumbering steps that always come with these night terrors, but none come.

Confused, the black-haired boy frowns and pinches his arm; nothing. This only pulls his frown even further down, disliking the disorientation he feels; Severus tumbles out of bed and realizes he's a child once more. "No..." He whispers and in desperation calls for his magic, he finds that it's lacking in its reserves and not nearly as disciplined as it had been only hours before. With a quiet whimper he begs for this all to be a nightmare. Quivering, he forces himself to pace his room until he's spent away enough of the unease for him not to shake any longer and with a resolve of a man possessed he opens his door and tip-toes to his mother and father's bedroom.

Pattering down the black hall, he pauses at the door in uncertainty, if this is real, he did not want to wake his father by accident and end up on the wrong side of his belt. But...he has to know. So, without a second though he twists the tarnished knob and peers through the crack to see his mother's dark hair cascading off the bed on one side and his father's lanky arm hanging over the edge of the other. Heart beating rapidly, Severus pulls the door closed again and stifles a scream. This was no time to become irrational or daft with fright, instead Severus deliberately strides back to his room and trudges through his closet for a pair of shoes, after sifting through a pile of clothes Severus finds a set of raggedy tennis shoes a size too small. Tugging them on, he leaves his room.

He doesn't know if he is the only one, but he plans to find out. His first stop will be the spot by the creek where he and Lily met every morning throughout their summers together, heading down the stairs he skipped over the creaky steps and slips out the back door with its broken lock and into the forest behind his home. Gliding through the woods, Severus takes little notice of the still dark sky all of his focus on seeking out answers and if he is to admit it, giddiness at the thought of seeing Lily after so many years.

Coming to their spot, Severus marvels at the turn of events; he would have never guessed _this _a possibility for his afterlife.

* * *

**First off, t****his is a Post-Hogwarts (or depending on how you look at it's a Pre-Hogwarts) story and the first chapter is **_very_ long, but I think I've laid out the scenes for everyone (maybe not all equally, I tried though). Any who I hope people are interested and curious to find out what happens next. If anyone wants I'm open to suggestions about characters, plot, ideas, and any corrections you have. I hope you _review_ and thank you for taking the time to read this.

**P.S. Don't expect every chapter to be this long, think more along the lines of a couple thousand words.**

**P.S.S. If anyone has a better title suggstion I'm willing to considering it. I don't like mine and am searching for a new one.**


	2. We Found Each Other Like a Mirror

**_We Found Each Other Like a Mirror_**

**Thanks for your positive feedback so far guys and to the reviewer who asked if this would be Lily/Severus; I'm not sure yet, but it's definitely a possibility. Also, to ravenblossom, at this point Tonks isn't even born and I'm not too sure how far this story will go time wise, but I was considering it when I began writing this story. It's reasonable that at some point or another Tonks will be introduced, but it will be a good while into this story.**

* * *

Lily wakes in a rumpled bed, sun shinning bright on her eyelids. Sitting up, her red mane falls about her imitating a flickering blaze. Blinking away the Sandman's dust, Lily remembers the night before in flashes, her lips curl unpleasantly. Not a dream then, she notes. Deciding she cannot waste the day, she stretches both arms above her head and yawns before making her way out of bed and back to her bedroom to change. In the almost foreign bedroom of pastels and childish whimsies, Lily searches the closet for a suitable outfit. With a scowl she realizes the majority is made of dresses and what isn't dresses is skirts and blouses. Sighing, she tugs down a yellow summer dress and shrugs off her bed-clothes as she pulls the yellow outfit over her head. Leaving her room, a revelation overcomes her. Severus. She needs to find him, surely he can help her. Lily rushes down the hall, but her escape out the front door is stopped by her father, who's picking up his briefcase and fixing his tie in the hall mirror before he leaves.

"'scue me daddy." She murmurs trying to get around him.

"Did you even have breakfast yet Lil?" Her father asks instead casting her a curious glance.

"Yes." She fibs smoothly, but then her mother steps into the hall; pair of glasses in hand.

"You forgot these Paul." She says handing them off and it's at that moment she chooses to glance down and notice Lily trying to slip out.

The woman raises an eyebrow at her and says. "Where do you think you're going missy?"

Lily frowns. "Out." She states.

Her mother only manages to look even less pleased. "I don't think so. First you will have breakfast and then you will help me with the dishes and watering the house plants." She commands and Lily can only pout.

"Fine mummy." She grumbles. Her mother gives a nod and turns away disappearing back into the adjacent kitchen.

"Bye lily." Her father says, ruffling her tangled hair.

"Bye dad." Lily sighs watching him close the door behind him.

"Breakfast Lily!" Her mother calls and with an aggravated heave trudges into the kitchen. She looks up from the linoleum flooring to see Petunia sneering at her over her porridge. Lily glowers as she takes her seat beside her dour sister and picks up a piece of toast set upon a plate in the middle of the round table.

"Freak." Her sister hisses. Lily has to stop herself from groaning, not _this _again!

* * *

Lily sneaks out the backdoor when her mother's not watching and 'Tuney's distracted by a phone call. When she manages to close the door with little more than a whisper the redhead does a victory dance before racing off down the street a joyful whoop bursting from her. _Finally_! She thinks, but then she feels bad and her running slows to a trot. She shouldn't feel so happy to be away from Mum and dad and Petunia, especially since two of them died only a couple of years ago and the other was as good as dead. Yet...their prescences are smothering and uncomfortable; she's forgotten how snippy Petunia truly was-is-, how mother kept her at the house with silly chores to stop her from finding or making trouble and _dad_! Gone at sun up and not back until sun down, she recalled as he left this morning toast half-shoved in his mouth and briefcase in hand.

With an irritable sigh, she takes a sharp turn on Louise Street swinging herself on to Spinner's end. Lagging to a stroll she walks down the increasingly decrepit block to a shabby park. Passing straight through, she plucks the chain of a swing and briefly a smile rises on her lips before settling into a frown. _Oh Severus..._she laminates. She almost loses her resolve at the thought the boy who had so much to prove, but so little guidance. Coming to a stop, she bites down on her lip and brings a freckled arm to wipe away the tears accumulating in the corner of her eyes; _Severus..._he was just the first little boy she failed and, now, her own son was a part of that short, but oh so heart crippling list.

Sniffling back a wave of tears, Lily tells herself to quit being an emotional wreck and find a way back to her time to save any other children from becoming a name on that list. With hands pulled into fists, she strides into the gnarled woods behind the park and lets old memories guide her to a spot of gay and airy childhood memories. Flitting around dry branches and prickly vines of berries she sloshed through decaying leaves to a small clearing by a creek. Lily startles back at what she sees, its _Severus_. At her ill-timed gasp, the boy jerks from his obvious brooding and twists his head to see her. At the sight of his pale face with dark smudges beneath his endless black eyes, the fading yellow of bruises blotting his skin and lank dark hair surrounding it; Lily feels her chest ache in sympathy and knowing. She understands now, just how terrifying, how horrible, how _important _his early childhood was to what he became and Lily swears to herself if he isn't like her she will guide him away from this dark world and to the _light._

Neither child says a word as they digest one another, it's when the silence begins to turn awkward that Lily scrabble for some sort of veiled message that she is sure a grown Severus would be able to see through. Grasping at the first thought that comes to mind, Lily blurts. "You're right, Petunia's a prick and always will be."

Severus blinks and then the tension drains from his shoulders and replaces it with lucidity as he brings himself to his feet. "Bravo" He snarks, "It only took you _years _to figure it out." The child drawls. But Lily hardly gives the sharp words any attention, finding the language frightfully disconcerting coming from a scrawny boy with the growl of a kitten.

She scrunched her brow and implores hesitantly. "Sev?"

The boy's face morphs into a bitter glare. "I think we're a bit old to be using nicknames, don't you?" He bites out.

Lily frowns and looks to the ground. "How old were you?" She asks her voice sounding tiny and just as young as she looks.

He kicks at the dirt and a hand comes to his throat, but he doesn't answer. Lily makes to ask again when he mumbles. "Thirty eight."

Lily nods at this and offers in condolences. "It was older than me, but I bet you knew that didn't you?" She says.

Severus grunts and lifts his head to gaze at her, his eyes flit between nostalgie, bitterness and something she can't name. "He had your eyes." Severus says quietly.

Lily's mouth dropped open. "He-Harry? Oh he _lived_?!" She cries out and in a sudden fit of relieved and joyous tears jumps the little boy in front of her and cries hotly into his shoulder choking out thank yous as she sobs. Severus is stiff and rigid against her at first, but eventually warms up enough to relax and lay a soothing hand against her back. His weight does more than soothe at that moment, it rekindles a relationship she thought lost forever and brings back an intense longing she'd burried away when she married James. _How she missed him__!_ She realizes.

"He was alive up until my death, that much I know." He explains quietly when her tears begin to subside. Lily laughs (but it leaves her wondering, up until his death?_What's that mean__?!_) and hugs her friend closer.

"_Thank you Sev._" She murmurs.

He averts his eyes and mutters. "It was the least I could do."

Lily grins up at him. "Your least is above and beyond." She says, this seems to startle Severus and his mouth flickers in a wiry smirk.

"I think a number of people would disagree Lily." He says to her.

Lily tosses her head back and barks a laugh. "They don't know what they're talking about." Both of them chuckle and fall into silence for a beat. Severus casts several flickering looks of uncertainty, before taking up her hands in his own.

"I'm sorry, for everything." He whispers earnest and true, shadow eyes begging for her to forgive him; (she already has).

Lily nods her head and lifts her wobbly lips into a smile. "I am too, I was a right bitch when I told you in fith year I was done with you." She sighs.

Severus shakes his head. "I deserved it."

"No one deserves to lose a friend over a silly name." She disagrees.

His eyes narrow and he growls. "Never say that, it's not a _silly _name; it's a name that starts_ wars_." Lily's emerald eyes go wide and she gapes at the intensity of her best friend's conviction, she wonders at that moment if this little boy is the Severus she loved, (or the one she always hoped he could be).

"Okay." She breathes, Severus searches her face before nodding his head in acceptance. They fade into silence for the last time and Lily takes the length to gaze about this little sanctuary she and Severus created as children. It's a pretty spot, with long grass and spring-green leaves drooping overhead to keep the glaring sunlight off them; her stare then fall to the crook where their reflection stares back at her. In it, Lily and Severus are side by side hands linked together. She grins at the image, after so long she finally has her best friend back. Yet, the smile's tinged with a sadness; there is no saving this boy, he's committed his crimes and is facing the consequences of them with every rise and fall of his chest.

* * *

**A Second chapter mostly focusing on Lily and her feelings and such with Severus, I'm thinking I'll do Severus's point of view from Lily's entering the spot and to when he returns home. Tell me what you guys think all suggestions, ideas, corrections, criticism is welcome and wanted. And lastly, thank you all for reading and for your reviews.**

**P.S. I'm still looking for a new Title Name. **


	3. Learn from your Mother or else

_**Learn from your Mother or else Spend your Days Biting your Own Neck**_

* * *

It's the catch of breath in the calmness of the spot that tares Severus from his brooding. Flinching, he turns to see a young Lily staring open mouth at him. She's just as he remembered; pale freckled skin, glossy red hair and beautiful emerald eyes. He's silent as he drinks her in and as she no doubt does the same. Soon the silence fades from observation to embarrassment, Severus wants to ask her if she remembers what he called her; but...he can't bare the thought of making her relive the memory or the idea that he would have to explain it to her. Luckily for him, Lily is the first to speak.

"You're right, a Petunia's a prick and always will be." She says to him and Severus can't help but roll his eyes. _For the love of_-he shakes his head, at least she didn't spend half her life trying to chase after someone who didn't want anything to do with her, (she's always been better at letting go of people, not like him).

As he pushes himself to his feet, Severus releases the tension from his body and sneers. "Bravo," taking a step closer he drawls. "It only took you _years _to figure it out." Lily doesn't say anything about his biting tone, nor does she seem to register it and it's at that second Severus wonders if he was wrong, _maybe she doesn't remember..._Then the girl's brow furrows and she gazes strangely at him.

"Sev?" She almost questions, seemingly uncertain of his reaction.

Severus crosses his arms and glares at her. She has no right to call him those ridiculous nicknames anymore, they aren't _friends. _"I think we're a bit old to be using nicknames, don't you?" He growls.

He watches Lily frown and casts her gaze down, playing with the hem of her cheery yellow dress she asks, "How old were you?" and it's in such a small voice that it pains Severus just to hear it.

Severus scowl darkens and he kicks angrily at the dirt and without even noticing, a single hand comes to grasp his whole neck. "Thirty eight." The boy grumbles.

Lily's eyes glassen with sadness, "It was older than me, but I bet you knew that didn't you?" She comments, (apologizing in so many words really). Severus huffs and sneaks his gaze up to look at her. It's so strange to see her so close and _alive_, but even now she's no longer his. Suddenly, a pair of green eyes shaded by a dark fringe comes to mind; the boy truly had her eyes...

"He had your eyes." Severus confides in her.

Lily's own eyes go impossibly wide and her petal pink lips drop open into a little 'o', Severus startles at the sight of tears beginning to track down her cheeks and when she tackles him into a hug wailing; "He-Harry? Oh he _lived_?!" As she sobs into Severus's shoulder he slowly, deliberately relaxes and puts a single comforting hand on her narrow back. A wave of warmth spreads through him and he comes to wonder if his friendship with Lily is truly dead and gone after all.

When her cries start to taper off, Severus moves his hand away and whispers to her, voice hoarse. "He was alive up until my death, that much I know." How he wishes he could tell her that her son-the last bit of Lily in all the world-had been hale and whole at the very end; (_but he cannot, he won't lie to her)._

_"Thank you Sev."_ She mumbles into his neck, tickling it with her warm breath.

Severus avert's his dark eyes and grunts. "It was the least I could do." (_Oh how he wishes it was, yet it wasn't; it was hardly adequate to make up for her life, for _all_ the lives he ruined_).

Lily lifts her head away and juts her chin out grinning up at him, it confounds Severus to no end. "Your least is above and beyond." She says to him and Severus's mouth parts in shock, beats later it twists into a mocking smirk. _Only you would believe that..._He thinks.

"I think a number of people would disagree Lily." Severus notes.

Lily's head falls back, her hair cascading across his lap in a woosh of fire and a miffed, disbelieving laugh bubbles up from her mouth. "They don't know what they're talking about." She counters and it causes them both to chuckle. They are quiet for a moment, comfortable to just reorient themselves to their friendship when Severus is drawn back to reality.

Casting a glance at his hands, he imagines them covered in blood; _her _blood. Then flickering his stare to her he nervously takes both her hands in his and whispers fervently. "I'm sorry, for everything."

Lily's eyes dappled with empathy and she nods her head. "I am too, I was a right bitch when I told you in fifth year I was done with you." She sighs, a weak smile resting on her lips.

Severus shakes his head causing his limp black hair to slap across his sallow face. "I deserved it." He tells her.

"No one deserves to lose a friend over a silly name." She argues hotly.

Severus grits his teeth as his eyes narrow. "Never say that, it's not a _silly _name; it's a name that starts_ wars_." He snarls and Lily's emerald orbs grow large at his harsh language.

"Okay." She nearly mouths, clearly uncomfortable. Severus accepts this with an assent of his head and allows everything to fall into quiet. They sit there hands grasped tightly for hours, until the sun is high in the sky and Lily begins to move once more. She casts a nervous sideways glance at him before releasing his hand, (Severus's hand is cold without hers). "I gotta go." She explains to him. "Mums got to be wondering where I've gone." And then her face blanks. "That's so weird to say." She mutters, slender fingers fluffing her wild red locks "I haven't had to worry over any curfews in _years._"

Severus snorts. "A privelage of the young." He snarks.

Lily giggles, but cuts it off quickly sending him an anxious stare before heaving out in breath of air. "I'll be back tomorrow, okay? We can figure out what to do then." Lily leans down to plant a good-bye kiss on his cheek. Her face blooms red at the realization of what she's done and then the nine-year old darts out of the clearing yelling over her shoulder. "I'll bring a snack for us too, alright!?"

Severus doesn't answer too stunned by the peck and by the time he reigns in his emotions, Lily's long gone. Glowering down at his reflection in the crook's water, Severus notices with a bit of trepidation clouds are starting to gather in the horizon. _What to do.._He wonders, Severus has little interest in returning home, but where else is he to go? Too young to stay anywhere else and with a darkening scowls also realizes he can't hide out in the library without someone wondering where his mother or father is. Severus stays rigid in his spot until early evening when the clouds finally decided to release their burden. As the rain pours, Severus scuttles up on his feet and runs through the woods back to his childhood home.

Bursting in to the house, his mother doesn't look away from the pot on the stove. "Where were you all day, young man?" She demands.

Severus frowns. "Out." He snips.

"Watch it Severus Tobias Snape, I will not tolerate that tone." She hisses, her coal colored eyes finally trained on him.

Severus thoroughly chastised, drops his gaze to his toes and mumbles. "Sorry mum."

The woman nods, accepting the apology. "Go change love." She tells the child, voice a bit gentler.

"Yes mum." Severus answers, rushing off into the hall and to his room. Struggling out of the dripping clothes, Severus walks over to his closet and finds a new set of clothes to put on. As he buttons up his shirt, the front door clatters opens. Severus's stomach lurches in a way that it hasn't since he was a young boy and his skin begins to perspire with fear, taking a ragged breath; Severus forces the feelings down with the sheer power of will.

A chair in the kitchen scrapes across the tiles. "Oi! Where's my dinner!?" His father yells and Severus jumps.

"Right here Tobias." His mother's strained voice warbles, followed by the clack of a dish being set on the table. His father's voice growls something Severus can't catch, when his mother answers. "He's here, I sent him to change a minute ago." Severus hears his mother move away from the kitchen and down the hall, looking away from his closet he sees her standing in the hall.

"Come have dinner Severus." His mother orders him.

"I'll be there in a minute." He whispers and his mother accepts this with a nod. After his mother's disappeared from view, the boy takes a shaky breath and forces his mind to empty of all irrelevant emotions, (it doesn't work nearly as well as it had when he was grown.) Coming into the kitchen, he slips into a chair and gazes down at his soup.

His father's red eyes focus on him as he snarls. "I paid good money for that food." Severus picks up his spoon and moves to take up some, but his stomach rolls and his mouth goes dry. "Eat!" His father screams at him slamming his hands on the table, Severus flinches and in the process drops his spoon. "You little brat! Think you're too good for it, huh?" His father roars reaching over and slapping the boy. Severus tumbles from his seat and to the ground curling into a ball.

"Tobias!" His mother shouts. "Stop!" She begs throwing herself at her husband.

"Get off ya bitch!" The lanky man hollers shoving his wife to the floor, his mother shrieks digging her nails into his arm and father retaliates by kicking her in the side. "Goddamnit Eileen!" His father yells at her, while he tries to shake her off.

Severus, unfurling from his ball, gathers every bit of courage he's earned through the years and rushes at his father; shocking him enough to release his mother. "Stop!" Severus cries. Tobias's fist cuffs Severus's eye, and the child stumbles as he turns to face his sobbing mother. "We don't have to put up with this mother! Why can't we leave?" He pleads.

His mother's scared eyes find him and a hand decorated in hues of purples, blues, blacks and yellows comes to her mouth holding back a particularly loud sob. "He's my _husband_! I can't just _l-leave_!" She gasps, Severus feels tears leak from his eyes. (Why, why, _why?)_

"Tryin' to turn my wife on me, are ya?" His father growls and Severus freezes, utterly and wholly terrified. "I'll show ya what happens to lil'traitors like ya!" His father thunders. It's before Severus can make a move that his father's large hand wraps around his skinny arm trapping him.

Bucking at his father's grip for all his worth, Severus begins to scream for his mother. "Mum! _Mum!_" But his mother stays on the floor, silent tears falling endlessly from her eyes. "Help me!" Severus wails. The haggard woman shakes her head and closes her eyes as her husband drags her only son from the room. "_MUM!_" Severus screams, but she doesn't come to his call as Tobias begins to beat their son with his belt, nor when his cries reach volumes unprecedented. Severus fights against every lashing, valiantly trying to dredge up any magic. It's when he fears his father's belt will never stop that his magic (_finally_) heads his command, it whips out hitting his father square in the chest and giving Severus enough energy to run from his house and carry him all the way down the street and to Lily's home.

Coming to a breathless halt at her front porch, Severus's inside begin to twist. _What if..._she doesn't answer the door? What if she doesn't _want _him here? The dark eyed boy almost turns back around, but then he recalls his father's murderous face as his magic hit him; Severus's knees shake. He _can't _go back, not tonight, not _ever. _Gathering up his resolve, he walks up the cleanly swept steps and across the immaculately white porch boards and knocks on the rich green door.

"I got it!" A voice shouts, _Lily_, his heart hammers and a second later, he sees Lily's lovely face staring at him.

"Severus?" She whispers eyes huge in confusion and the boy tries to give a little smile, but it ends up being more a cringe than anything else. Stepping out on to the porch, Lily's hand reaches out brushing a fingers across his chin. Severus twists away, wincing at the pain. Her face deathly pale and eyes horrorfyingly large she murmurs. "What happened?" Holding out fingers smeared red with blood.

Severus-for all his years of spying and learning to control every bit of him that could give his role away-can't stop himself from crying silently as he stammers. "S-She didn't _do _anything-" and without hesitation, Lily's short arms shoot out and enclose around him, allowing Severus to hide his face against her shoulder as he tries to hold back his sobs, fearing if he doesn't, he'll _never _stop.

(Un)surprisingly, Lily's mother comes to see what the commotion is, she falls against the door frame with a caught breath and a woozy, "Oh my..."

Stepping away from Severus, one of his hands confidently gripped in hers, Lily sticks her chin out stubbornly. "This is my friend Severus, he's staying over tonight." She tells her mother.

Her mother nods. "Let me tell your father." She whispers stepping into the house.

A muffled argument starts somewhere in the home and Severus glances at Lily. "I can always-"

"No." Lily cuts in. "You're staying." She orders.

The raised voices quiet and in an instant Lily's stern father stands in the glow of the entrance. Paul's eyes become the size of plates as he gapes. "Jesus, Mary and Joseph." He whispers.

"Severus can sleep with me can't he?" Lily demands, glaring steadily up at her father.

"He can stay for as long as he wants." Her father answers readily.

Severus, with what little pride he has left lies blatantly to Lily's father. "I need only tonight, he'll calm down enough for me to go home tomorrow." The man's face is doubtful, but he tilts his head in understanding.

"Julie can help you clean up." He offers, stepping aside allowing Lily _and _Severus to pass the threshold.

Stepping into the home's warm atmosphere, Severus feels all of his physical nine years and none of his true thirty-eight as he mumbles to Paul embarrassed, "I can manage on my own." The man's face stays blank as he nods.

"C'mon Sev, this way." Lily ushers, bringing him to the bathroom. Julie stands by the door, an old dress shirt of Paul's in hand along with a towel and a first-aid kit.

"Here you are." She says handing them off. Severus takes them with a meek thank you and hurries into the washroom. Closing the door, Severus slides down against the door allowing it to hold his raw back up as he chokes back another round of crying. He can't do this, not now. Resolving to weep no more, Severus pulls himself up on his wobbly legs and walks over to the sink and in the mirror sees his reflection.

"Fuck." He whispers gazing at his face, it's a mess; blood drips down his chin from his split lip and more gushes from a wound on his forehead while one of his shadowed eyes squint ever so slighty from the deep purple ring of swelling that surrounds it. Opening his mouth, he's not surprised to find that a tooth is missing; _I hope it's not a mature one..._Turning on the tap, Severus begins to splash water on his face and manages to sooth his black eye some. When he finishes, he watches entranced as the water turned pink from his crimson blood washes down the drain. If the blood from his face causes the water to become pink, he doesn't even want to consider what his back will do to the water.

Taking up a towel, he pats his face dry and then cracks open the practically new first-aid kit, bandaging up his injuries before he sheds his sullied clothes. Throwing them all into a pile in the corner of the bathroom, he twists around to catch a glimpse of his bare back in the mirror and is relieved to find the majority of the welts covering it are no longer bleeding and only a few look deep. Deciding his back can wait until a later day, Severus fumbles with the buttons of Paul's shirt before getting it on and redoing the buttons. Once he's finished in the bathroom, he slips out to find Lily waiting against the wall. She scrambles up on her feet and gives him her hand. "Mum said you could sleep in my bed." She explains dragging him down the hall to her room. In the softly colored room, they find Lily's mother smoothing down the hair of a doll in the middle of the bed, her eyes rimmed red.

"Lily!" She exclaims, rising up from the bed.

"It's my room mum." Lily states logically, gently guiding Severus's slimmer form behind her. Julie blinks and then smiles ever so slightly.

"It is, isn't it?" She mumbles, her mother shifts away and pulls the sheets back inviting her daughter and her friend to get in. Leading them to the bed, Lily crawls in; not once letting go of Severus's hand. Lily's mother situated the sheets evenly over them and she then leans down planting a warm kiss on Lily's forehead. "Night love." She breathes.

"Night." Lily chirps. As Lily's mother straightens, her hand hesitantly comes to brush a dirty lock from Severus's face.

"Goodnight." She says to him, Severus nods his head in acknowledgement. She stands their gazing at the two children and then with a small shake of her head walks away turning off the lights as she leaves the room.

"Mum!" Lily yells.

"Hm?" Her mother questions, standing in the doorway poised to close the door.

"Can you leave it a crack?" She whines.

Julie gives an unreadable smile and mutters. "Of course love" and she does.

When the house has settled around them, her parents hushed discussion in the other room has died away to silence and only the sound of Petunia's faint snores can be heard Severus turns his head and whispers to Lily. "Thank you."

Her eyes are closed, yet she speaks. "Always, Sev, Always."

* * *

**So what does everyone think? Is it good? Is it bad? Spectacular? Horrible? By the way, still looking for a new Tile, best one so far is _This Time Around, _suggested by _KodeV_. Also, I've had a reviewer ask about Peter Pettigrew, two say he shouldn't have his memories; what do others of you think? Thanks for your positive feedback so far guys and please continue to read and review!**

***Special thanks to Kindli, KodeV, Professor Radar, and Ravenblossom for your particullarly thoughtful comments.***


	4. I can't Sit Idly, No, I Can't Move

**_I can't Sit Idly, No, I can't Move at All_**

* * *

A bony finger prods Sirius into the world of wakefulness and away from his land of horrifyingly wonderful dreams, dreams of _peace._ If there is one thing Sirius knows, no matter how much he may wish it or dream of it; peace, is not an achievable dream for a man (boy) born with the instinct to rebel. Putting his dreams away, Sirius turns his head to catch an earful of his younger brother's soft snores as he gazes over at Kreacher. "What?" He grunts around a yawn.

"Missus an' Master Black wants the little masters to dines with them." He explains blandly and disappears from the room with a sound pop. Sirius groans and flops over, accidentally jarring Regulus with his movement.

"S'rius?" His brother slurs, blinking rapidly at up at him.

Swinging his legs over the edge of the bed, Sirius says to his brother; "Get up, mother and father wish for you to _dine _with them." He finishes with a sneer his brother cannot even see.

"Alright." Regulus murmurs with a sleepy sigh as he crawls out of the bed.

Sirius watches his younger brother rub a hand down his face with something akin to wonder. "You know, you should go get changed; mother and father don't like it when we don't come down dressed." He comments walking over to his own closet in the process.

The younger boy's face twists strangely at these words and out from his mouth spills; "But-" He stops himself with a click of his teeth and gazes down at the ground instead.

Throwing his sleep clothes on the ground in a wrinkled heap, Sirius contemplates them for a beat before he nods his head in satisfaction. Yes, best to piss his parents off in every way he can; even if _he _doesn't like lined clothes either. "What's it Reg?" He asks finally, when it becomes obvious his baby brother is lingering for a reason.

"I thought father said you wouldn't be getting breakfast this morning." He whispers in a small voice, head ducking down to hide his reddening cheeks.

"Yeah, so? He probably wants to rub you all eating in my face." Sirius replies nonchalant. Then, gray eyes sparkling with bellied laughter he continues;"I'll just knick something from the kitchen when the elves aren't watching." Regulus answers back with a stricken look, sighing, Sirius steps forward clapping a strong hand on his little brother's shoulder. "Don't worry baby brother, I did it all the time." He winks with a mischievous grin.

Regulus gazes back doubtful, yet nevertheless nods agreeably. "Okay." He mutters.

Sirius chuckles. "Good." The older boy then steers Regulus towards the bedroom door and tells him; "Go get dressed! I'll see you in five!"

Regulus twists his neck and cries out. "Wait! When'll we talk? We _have _to!"

Strolling over to his closet, Sirius's fingers flitting through the fabric of his predominantly black and gray clothing."Later, after breakfast." Sirius dismisses, gaze not wavering from his choices.

Regulus stares over at his brother and his shoulders slump. "Okay" he exhales. Sirius doesn't turn away from his closet even when the footfall of his brother hesitates to begin.

* * *

When Sirius finds himself gazing at the long table in the elaborate, yet almost empty, dining room he frowns. _What a waste; a dining room like this would be better suited to the Weasleys-_anyone_ with a family larger than ours-_he grumbles to himself. Sirius meanders to his empty spot at the table, it's not until he lets out a cough as he slithers into his seat that father glances up from his newspaper, mother from reading a letter from her brother and Regulus from plucking at his breakfast of toast.

Giving the newspaper a jerk to realign it his father tells him with a scowl. "I told you not to expect breakfast."

"I remember." Sirius agrees amicably casting his stare sideways at his brother, Regulus flushes and sets down the piece of toast he was about to bite.

His father's frown deepens and he growls at Sirius. "Do not do it again or you'll be missing more than breakfast."

With a bob of his head, Sirius murmurs. "Yes father." A moment later he begins to fidget and asks, "May I be excused father?"

"Yes." His father grunts bringing his paper back up to read.

Scrambling up from his seat, Regulus begs. "May I be too, father?"

"Yes Regulus." The man lowers his paper a tad, watching his two sons hurry out of the room; just before they are in the hall he calls. "What is it you two are up to?"

The young boys glance at each other. "We are going to the library father." Regulus pipes up, a tiny smile toying on his lips.

Suspicions fully activated the Black puts his paper down and raises an eyebrow. "Sirius? In the _library_? Now, that must be quite the sight." His elder son bares his teeth in a fashion not unlike a dog, but Orion Black isn't surprised. "Whatever you two are planning, it stops now." He orders and with that disappears behind his paper one last time, feeling his warning received.

"Yes father." The two accept in tandem.

"Go." Orion grunts and the children scatter.

* * *

"Why are we in the library?" Sirius whines, clambering over his armchair to gaze over the top at his brother who's running his fingers along the spines of books on one of the lower shelves.

"We have least a thousand books here, if not _more-_" He pauses abruptly, his fingers dancing up the binding of a leather-bound tome before he pulls it from the shelf. "There has to be _something _in here that can help us."

Sirius gives his brother a question look. "With _what_?" He pouts.

Gesturing at himself and next at his brother with a flourish Regulus squeaks. "With _this_!" Face a cherry red he rants. "Do you _like _this? Do you _like _being a child? Being here with _mother _and _father_?!"

Sirius blinks at his brother's uncharacteristic display of open anger and then with a lazy smile pulls himself up onto the back of the armchair and jumps. "Calm down. It's not so bad, we'll figure it out eventually." He says to his brother, thumping him soundly on the back.

The heavy tome in Regulus's hands falls and the cover flops open to reveal the first page with a name penned across it; _Andromeda Black_. Both boys gaze at the signature in silence.

A couple of minutes of silence later, Regulus whispers. "Do you think anyone else remembers?" He then lifts his gaze to catch a glimpse of his elder brother's unusually solemn face.

It quickly falls away and he replaces it with a cheery grin. "No way to find out without asking." His brother chirps.

Regulus frowns. "How are we going to do that? It's not like we can write them a letter asking 'hey do you remember being an adult?'" He grumbles crossing his arms.

"I know that!" Sirius snaps, face furrowed in an angry sneer. When he realizes his younger brother is cowering, he relaxes his features and reaches over ruffling Reg's hair and offers. "We write them a letter, a letter that invites them _all _to tea."

"Even Bellatrix?" Regulus whispers unsure.

With a resolute nod, Sirius answers. "Yes, even Bellatrix."

Regulus cringes. "But she's..."

"Bonkers. I know." Sirius sighs.

"Was she still? Even after I died?"

Sirius hums his agreement and then adds. "Even more so after Azkaban."

Regulus's eyes become the size of saucers. "_Azkaban_?" He whispers completely speechless.

"Uh-huh, a lot of Death-eaters ended up their for a while." Sirius explains.

Regulus whistles lowly and murmurs. "Wow, I wish I could have been around."

Sirius cringes. "No, no you don't baby brother." He disagrees adamantly. His brother gives him a confused look, but knows better than to ask, (and for that Sirius is grateful). "Do you want to write the letter? Or should I?" Sirius implores walking away from his brother to grab a piece of parchment from the desk in the middle of the room.

"You can, but we should both sign it." Regulus replies easily trotting after the older boy.

Scratching out a quick message, Sirius then signed his name with flourish before stepping away allowing his younger brother access to the letter.

_Dear Andromeda, Narcissa, and Bellatrix,_

_We would like to invite you to tea this afternoon._

_Sirius and_

"Way to be blunt." Reg mutters and with a sigh he takes the quill from Sirius and spells out his own name. "Kreacher." He calls once he's folded the letter up.

The elf appears and gazes up at the two children. "Yes little masters?"

"I want you to give one of the owls this; tell them it's for Andromeda, Narcissa and Bellatrix." He explains to the house-elf, handing over the parchment.

Taking the letter, he brings it close to his body and bows. "Of course little master."

"Thanks." Regulus whispers with an upturn quirk of his lips, the elf's eyes glow happily as he apparates from the room. They stand side by side not speaking for several minutes before Sirius begins to pace.

"I hope they write back soon." He grumbles.

"I'm sure they will." Regulus soothes.

His brother's eyes lock on him and Reg finds himself beginning to sweat at the madness he sees lurking in them. "I'm _sick_ of waiting." His brother snarls.

"Impatience has only ever brought you misfortune. I'd have thought you know that by now." Regulus sighs, because he is _absolutely _certain his brother lived far longer than he did, (and quite possibly his end more damning than his own).

His brother gives the younger Black a sharp (bitter) smirk. "Some people never learn Reg."

Strutting over to Sirius, He gazes up at his brother's face and tells him "It's never too late."

Sirius ignores his suggestion and twitches with pent-up breath, he grumbles. "I can't just _sit _here."

"We can't move forward untill we know if they can remember like we do." Regulus counters, gently pushing his elder brother into the armchair he abandoned earlier.

Letting Reg shove him back into the chair, Sirius sighs and blinks. He's _so _tired, he just wants to sleep and never wake up again. (_Why did this happen? Why couldn't fate, god, _whoever_, let him _alone_?_) "I'm _tired._" He whispers.

Regulus, with strained gray eyes nods. "We all are." He mutters.

"How do you know?" Sirius argues, fighting to stay awake.

"Who _isn't _tired during war?" His brother inquires, a faint-almost amused-grin on his lips.

Sirius barks a laugh. "I don't know."

"The dead."Regulus utters.

Sirius frowns and squirms in his seat, uncomfortable. "We _are _dead." He mumbles, and then he shifts his gaze to dart about the room. "Aren't we?" He asks after a pause.

"Supposedly, but I guess we aren't anymore." Regulus answers with a shrug.

"This _can't _be real" Sirius groans.

"Then what is real?." The younger boy mutters.

"I don't know." Sirius moans tossing an arm over his eyes, they talk no more.

* * *

**So what do you all think? Is this a good chapter? A bad one? I'm thinking the next chapter I'll do the Black sisters next, but who should I do after that? On a similar note, what do people think should be done about Peter? Does anyone think he's a critical character that needs to be added? Please review and thanks to those who did last chapter; Extraordinary Geek, KodeV, Su no Yo, Tell-Me-Tales, New Moongirl and Blackphoenix23.**

***Special thanks to reviewers Su No Yo, who told me that I didn't mention Severus being hurt anywhere but his face. I've since then fixed that up and am very grateful for the inquiry after it.***

**P.S. Last chapter I'll ask for new Title suggestions, so far I have one suggestion which is ****_This Time Around_**


	5. Black House Will Rock

**_Black House Will Rock_**

* * *

A flutter of feathers draws Narcissa away from the letter she was writing and crumpled pile scrapped parchment beside it, holding out her hand the owl lands and drops a letter in her upturned palm. Putting the simply folded letter on her desk, Narcissa scratches the owl's head and coos "Thank you lovely." The owl trills happily before leaving her in a burst of energy. Smiling, the twelve-year-old turns back to her desk; her brow furrows then as her eyes dart between her own letter and the one waiting for her. With a dissatisfied sigh, she decides her own can wait a moment (maybe longer) as she opens the letter she received.

_Dear Andromeda, Narcissa, and Bellatrix,_

_We would like to invite you to tea this afternoon._

_Sirius and Regulus_

Narcissa frowns, _strange..._neither of her cousins growing up had ever taken much interest in their older, _female _cousins. Trying to puzzle out what this possibly means, a thought comes to the blond. _What if they-_With a clatter she rockets from her chair knocking it to the floor, but she ignores it as she runs from her room shouting "Bella! Andy!" Between tears and laughter she cries "Come quick!" In an instant both of her sisters darkheads are peering out of their respective rooms.

"What is it 'cissa?" Andromeda implores, her face a blotchy red.

"I think-" She starts, but stops gasping for a breath in between her panting. "I think our cousins are like _us_." She finishes in a whisper voice exuberant and hopeful.

"Bully for them!" Andromeda sneers, one hand on hip. "Good to know the brat and idiot have been gifted with memories of the future! Because they _so _deserve to remember!" She yells and wish a swish of her skirt her bedroom door slams and Bellatrix and Narcissa are left staring open mouth at the door that seperates them from their sister. The letter fluttering from her fingers, Narcissa comes to stand in front of her older sisters door. Knocking, she leans against the mahogany and exhales.

"Andy? What happened?" Narcissa pleads, kneading her knuckles against the door she implores "Won't you let us in? _Me?_"

Bellatrix's heels clip against the floor as she walks over to the abandoned letter and picks it up. Glancing at the single question she turns to her baby sister and says softly. "Shall I tell them today's not a good day?" Narcissa stares at Bellatrix like she's a riddle she can't figure out.

"I can't ever remember you being nice." She tells her older sister.

Bellatrix shrugs. "Mother and father took me to visit _him_ once a year from eleven onwards." She explains and after a pause she continues "Until I was willing to join his cause by my own will." A bitter smile flits across her features then. "It wasn't my choice by that point, it was me picking to stop the pain and turn it on to someone else."

Narcissa gazes at her sister. "Why did mother and father do that to you?"

Bellatrix shakes her head causing her mane of curls to fly. "Why does anyone do anything?" She exhales. Her fingers curl around the letter causing it to crinkle, startled her stare snaps back to the letter in her hand. "I think I shall go write them back." She says slowly, "If I remember right, I'm sure Sirius is impatient; I wouldn't put it past him to send a Howler to get our attention."

Narcissa barks a laugh. "Yes, you're probably right." And with one last smile, Bella disappears to her room once again.

A stifled sob sounds from behind the door and Narcissa groans. Knocking for a third time she calls. "Andromeda?" No answer. "Won't you let me in?"

"No!" A voice yells.

Hands planting themselves on her waist, Narcissa sucks in an irritated breath. "_I'm_ not doing this Andy! _We_ aren't doing this!" She shouts, "Let me in or I'll let myself in!" When all she gets is the sound of pitiful sniffling, Narcissa whips out her wand and casts an opening charm on the door.

"You can't _do _that!" Andromeda shrieks.

"I can too and I did." Narcissa smirks.

Picking up her pillow, Andromeda flings it at her younger sister. "Get _OUT_!" She roars. The blond winces at the impact when she refuses to dodge, but it's at moment like these that she's thankful her mother and father rarely come with in fifty feet of their wing; it saved them from trouble on several occasions.

Fitting her jaw into stubborn set, Narcissa gives a shakes her head causing the pony-tail she pulled her hair into to swish. "Not until you tell me what's wrong."

Andromeda's eyes water and in a fit of tears she points over at her desk.

Stalking over to the table in the corner, Narcissa notices a single creased parchment on it. Picking it up she reads;

_Dear Ted Tonks,_

_Do you remember Nymphadora?_

_Andromeda Black_

Scrawled beneath it is a reply written in the messy writing of a teenage boy;

_What year is she in?_

_Ted_

Dropping the letter, Narcissa stepped away from the desk before running at her sister's bed and jumping on. "I'm _so sorry_!" Narcissa whispers fiercely into her older sister's hair as she holds her shivering body close.

"He doesn't remember _our _baby!" The older girl wails, fingernails digging in sharply to her back. Narcissa soothes and pat her sisters back until her hiccups dies to whimpers and her tears end. They are quiet for a while, both collecting themselves; haltingly, Andromeda pulls away from her younger sister wiping away the remnants of her tears with manicured nails.

"I'm sorry." Narcissa apologizes, eyes down cast.

The teenager laughs; (yet, it's far from joyful) "Oh 'cissa whatever are _you _sorry for?"

The blond girl is uncertain of what she should say: I'm sorry you can't have your husband? I'm sorry that your daughter doesn't _exist_? I'm sorry you have to go through this? I'm sorry that I'm a terrible sister? I'm sorry that _this _happened all together? There are so many things Narcissa could apologize for, but she knows it's impossible to pick just one to apologize for so, instead, she simply repeats "I'm sorry." Hoping that her sister will hear every unwhispered reason.

Andromeda smiles at her and sniffles as she dabs at her eyes with the sleeves of her blouse. "Have you written Lucius yet?" She asks.

The younger sister bites her lip. "I can't." She answers.

Andromeda blinks in startlement. "Why ever not?" Her sister demands leaning in close, scrutinizing every tell-tale feature of Narcissa's face.

Narcissa smiles through unshed tears. "I'm not as brave as you sister. I don't think I'll make it if Lucius doesn't remember _us_, I dare say I'd die on the spot." She admits. Andromeda falls back against her jade green sheets in a fit of snickers and guffaws. Perturbed, Narcissa leans over her and questions worriedly "Are you alright Andy?"

Between her gasp for breath, Andy waves a dismissive hand. "Oh-Oh" She chuckles, "Listen to us!" Gazing up at her sister with contradictory eyes of merriment and pain she whispers in a rush "We sound like love-struck _children_!"

Narcissa's lips quirk into a smile as she hides her giggling behind a pale hand. "We _do_!" She awes, "_Oh _how _childish_ we are!" And the two sisters laugh until they're crying and clinging to one another.

"With every tick of a clock we become more like children." Andromeda utters horrified.

Snivelling miserably, Narcissa mutters "How else are we to fit in? If not by being the age we are?"

"Why were we brought here then? To relive our lives and have nothing change!" Her older sister demands, gripping Narcissa's wrist in a bruising hold as she searches the blond for any sign of dissent.

"It will change!" Narcissa roars back. "It has too!"

Suddenly as her rage had possessed her, it left her and Andromeda Black mumbled. "What if it doesn't?"

"It has too!" The younger sister repeats desperately.

"We'll make sure of it." Bellatrix confirms from the doorway.

"Bella!" Narcissa exclaims. "How long have you been there?" She frowns.

The older girl shrugs. "A while." And then stepping forward, she drops two letters on the bed. "One's for you 'cissa and the other is from the two terrors we claim our blood."

Picking up the one that belongs from her, Narcissa unfolds it to see one shakey-familiar-request written upon it.

_I need you_

"Oh Lucius..." She whimpers, her lips wobbling ready to release a pent up sob of relief. Getting up from the bed, Narcissa says "I have to go to him."

Grabbing her baby sister's elbow before she can throw herself into the fireplace, Bellatrix orders. "Wait a minute."

Yanking away, the furious girls screams. "I can't! He _needs _me!"

"You won't if you don't want mother and father coming after you!" Her sister snarls.

Narcissa trembles and falls to her knees sobbing into her hands. "What am I to do then? _Abandon _my _husband_?"

Painfully aware of what she says will either break or make her bond with her sister, Bella murmurs. "No, you wait."

Her blond head jerks from her hands and she glares furiously at her sister to hiss "_Wait?" _The teenager nods. "I _won't! _I _can't_!" She shrieks.

Kneeling in front of the young girl, Bella takes her hand and whispers to her fervently "Only until to tonight." Seeing that she's drawn her sister's attention and hope to the surface, Bella continues. "I'll take you there myself, when mother and father are asleep and not monitoring the floo or the comings and going of those on the property." Narcissa nods and lets Bella help her up from the floor and back to Andromeda's bed where the last letter waits.

"Are you going to open it?" Andromeda questions gazing up at her older sister. With a sigh, the eldest girl picks it up and reads aloud;

_"Come tomorrow._"

Glancing at the two younger girls, Bella raises an eyebrow. "Well?" She demands.

Rubbing at her temple, Andromeda grumbles. "I have no plans."

Blotting at her eyes with a handkerchief, Narcissa mumbles. "Nor do I."

A slow grin spreading across her pale cheeks, Bellatrix says. "That settles it then." and the dark-haired girl walks over to the desk jotting down a quick reply before whistling for a house elf.

"Send that to Sirius Black." She tells the elf.

"Yes miss Black." It agrees with a compliant bow before disappearing from the room. Turning back to her sisters, Bella gazes at them sadly. After a moment consideration, she opens her arms wide welcoming both sisters into an embrace. With only a second doubt, the two girls catapult themselves into the waiting arms and together the trio cry out their sorrows.

* * *

**Here's the fifth chapter! What do you guys think of them? Bellatrix? Andromeda? Narcissa? I know they come off a bit melodramatic, but what teenage girl isn't? (don't say they aren't either, 'cause I _know _they are). Anyway, thank you for reading and please _review_! Also, two new titles to pick from this chapter, _This Time Around _and _Again and Again_ or if you prefer, you can choose to keep the story's current title, _A Second Go_.**

**P.S. Who Should I do Next? Remus? Lucius? or James?**


	6. And Love is Not a Victory March

**_And Love is Not a Victory March_**

* * *

When light scatters across the room from the tall window's skewed drapes, Lucius lets his gaze drift from their intertwined hands to his father's face. Abraxas Malfoy's face is pale-bloodless-bony and gaunt; it speaks volumes on how much he suffered in his last days, (months, years, _life_). Suddenly, in a fit of anger, Lucius jumps to his feet jerking away from the stiff hand that cradled his. "I hate you!" Lucius screams at the corpse, "Why did you have to die?!" Breathing hard through his sobs, Lucius falls to his knees hiding his tears behind a boy's hands. "Why..." He whimpers.

Regretful of his previous actions, Lucius crawls over to his father's side taking up the icy hand and presses it against his cheek, (maybe he's _not _gone, maybe his father is tricking him, maybe he will jump right out of bed and tell Lucius it was all one big joke, once and for all) warms tears spilling from his eyes and down the cold hand, Lucius hiccups. "If anyone...If anyone deserved to come back, it was you daddy." He stays there on his knees until they ache and his tears run dry. Eventually shifting to relieve the pressure on his knees, his living breath causes a strand of his father's hair to shift and in the light and he's reminded of another blond he loved, (loves) _Narcissa_...

With a sudden purpose, Lucius is up on his feet and stumbling over them in an effort to reach his room quick enough. Rushing to his desk, he jerks open a drawer and pulls out a thicket of parchment and drops it on the wooden top in a messy heap as he scrabbles for quill from his ink well. Taking a black-feathered pen up in his fingers, he scrawls out a single message;

_I need you_

Chest squeezing painfully, he prays Narcissa will know and will come to him. Darting to his window, he opens it and whistles for his owl. Within moments, an owl is swooping down from the trees surrounding the manor and perching on Lucius's outstretched arm. Holding out the letter, he says to the bird. "Takes this to Narcissa M-BLack." The animal trills in answer before lifting off and Lucius watches entrapped as the owl disappears into the horizon; leaving the boy (alone) to wait.

Somewhere in the time between his owl's leaving and the setting of the sun, Lucius falls asleep. He dreams, he dreams of enchanting things; glimpses of half-forgotten smiles, the mingling of baritone laughter and a child's soprano giggles, hot breath and satin-soft lips, whispers of long blond tresses against a stark back, the weight of a feather-light body in his hands, of _joy _and _hope._ However, like everything Lucius has ever known his dreams grow scorched around the edges, slowly gaining ground as the destructive fire moves in; hissed (false) promises, bone-white masks, murky black color staining pure skin, the sting of slaps and wounds of hearts, crying infants, _disappointed e_yes, so, so, _so many _slack faces and immobile bodies. In the throes of beauty turned horror, a single memory begins to play;

_The crowd jeers at him, they shout insults and accusations; but most of all they _cheer_. __They praise his jailers, his executioners, they cast off victorious flares from their wands and toast to his impending end as the men flanking either side of him drag his (beaten) body to the newly-cut steps of the platform. Lucius does not lift his head, he stares down at the unjudging dirt and whispers to it; _Don't forget me...I did what I thought right..._the ground does not speak, keeps no promises; Lucius, though, feels slightly better. The blond man stumbles abruptly realizing they've begun the assent to his gallow; the crowd roars with laughter and behind his dirty lank hair Lucius grits his teeth and seethes silently; _Fools...

_If only they realized, knew, what is to come; suspicions, accusations...this war is far from over. Upon taking the final step on to the platform, Lucius lifts his head one last time and a gasp of surprise leaves his lips at the sight of the human across from him. __Open mouth and trembling, Lucius utters _"Narcissa.."_ and with all he has left, escapes his captors and reaches his wife gripping her frail shoulders (they weren't always, his mind reminds him) in his weak hold. _

_Tears coarsing down her sunken cheeks the woman whimpers. "_Lucius." _Lucius quiets her with one last rapture inspiring kiss and clings to her with every bit of worth he still retains, clings to her even as the jailor make to pull him apart from his wife and as the crowd protest and calls for retribution. At last, the man's jailers separate him and his wife and with a cuff to his weak body guide him to his gallow. His executioner steps forward and with a cruel grin, situates the noose around his neck. Lucius ignores it all in favor of sending the crowd one last stare, it is full of hate and anger, but in his last seconds Lucius catches sight of a body slithering out of the crowd's edges and he opens his mouth to call out, to let the regal blond head know-_

Lucius wakes screaming and frantic hands reach out to him, smoothing his face and hair; desperately trying to mellow his fear. Bit by bit, he calms holding onto his comforter with all his boyhood strength. "Want to talk about it?" A youthful voice whispers, solemn and caring.

Finally lifting his chin, Lucius has to hold back a sob as he stares up into his wife's face of childhood. "_You came..._" He breathes awed and relieved.

A smile light's up her radiant features and she presses closer to Lucius with a hushed murmur. "Of course I did silly, though, I'm sorry I couldn't come sooner..."

Clutching her arms, Lucius pulls himself up away from her undeveloped breast where he'd squalled his fears only minutes before to stare into her pale blue eyes. Narcissa's eyes soften as Lucius's hand comes to rest on her supple cheek. "You're real." Lucius breathes.

The girl cracks a grin and leans in touching foreheads with Lucius. "Why wouldn't I be love?" She inquires. With a sudden burst of energy, Lucius presses his lips to Narcissa's causing her breath to catch. After a moment, the girl's arms come to rest around Lucius's neck while the boy's own secure themselves around the young blond's waist. They stay close for a long time, letting their lips mingle and dusting pecks on each other's cheeks and along one another's necks. Lucius's hand begins to toy with the cloak string resting just bellow Narcissa's breast bone, he _wants _her; he wants to meld with her once more, make them whole again.

Narcissa's hand comes to clasp his as she pulls away. "No." She whispers gazing pleadingly into his eyes. "Not like this." She begs of him, bringing his hand to her pink lips and peppering apologetic kisses on it.

The boy's face morphs to something thunderous as he hisses. "Why not? Do you not wish have me any longer?"

The girl's features mar with pain as she chokes back a sob. "No-"

"Then why!" Lucius demands.

"Not like this! Not when you're hurting!" She cries, tears dripping down her chin and into her lap. Lucius's heart pangs and he reaches over trying desperately to rub away the tears staining her flushed cheeks.

"I'm sorry, don't cry my love." He beseeches of her.

The girl's lips quirk and she strains herself to kiss her husband's cheek. "Hush, I know." She says to him. They fall silent for a time, neither willing to break the peace that's befallen them. Lucius eventually takes her girlish hand in his and leans in to her hair breathing hotly on her ear as he steals his resolve.

"He died." Lucius utters. "Again." He adds helpfully. His wife's stricken face slowly tilts toward him, horror-struck and racked with sympathy. Tears started anew, she snivels;

"Oh _Lucius_."

Water falling like rain from his eyes, Lucius admits. "_I don't know_ _what to do_." Hugging the older boy close, Narcissa murmurs soothing sounds and lets him cry into her shoulder. "I-I hardly got a _minute_ with him before _he-_!"

"Shhh..." Narcissa whispers running her fingers through Lucius's long blond locks. "Calm down love," She tells him. "What did you do last time?"

Lifting his head up and wiping away his tears with his sleeves, Lucius gazes pitifully at his wife with red eyes. "I don't know, I told the elves to take care of it."

Narcissa's brow furrows at this. "What happened when you announced your father passed away then? _I _remember there being a memorial."

"It was closed-casket." Lucius supplies. "I said he caught a horrendous case of dragon pox, that scarred him terribly." The boy admits a bit sheepishly.

Narcissa nods. "I remember now." Lucius chuffs his acknowledgement and then falls back with a body racking sigh. "What's wrong Lucius?" Narcissa questions worriedly, twisting around to look down at her husband's prone form.

"I don't want to lie again." The boy groans. Narcissa frowns and begins to toy with her sleeves as she waits for Lucius to go on. "It's horrible." He mutters, "Having to pretend someone is alive when they're really dead and you can't _say _anything, because then you'd bust the hoax!" He rants.

"Lucius..." Narcissa whimpers grasping for his hand.

"No! You don't get it!" He yells at her, jerking away.

"Stop, please...you're only hurting yourself." She cries once again trying and missing to touch her husband.

"It's not fair! _This _is not fair!" He shouts shoving all of his books from his desk to the floor. Rising to her feet, Narcissa tackles Lucius in a hug. Struggling against his wife, he roars. "Let me go! Leave me alone!"

"No." She whispers, clinging tight as he tosses himself and her to and fro. "Not ever!" She promises, glaring up at him. This seems to calm Lucius some, enough for him to finally _look _at her.

"Why do you stay with me?" He mumbles. "I've only ever brought you trouble," he comments and then face clouding, growls. "Only ever pain."

"No!" She disagrees, squeezing her husband closer. "You've given me your love wholly," She elaborates, "You gave me a son." She finishes with a sad laugh.

Lucius face contorts with sorrow. "Yes." He exhales, "A son we no longer have."

Narcissa shakes her head. "Not _yet_." She corrects. "I still wish to be your wife." She tells him and then glancing away, she whispers. "I still will bear you a son-more than one even-if you will allow me."

Lucius gazes open mouth at her. "More?" He repeats. "One son was enough strife, I can't imagine what _two, _or even _three _would be like." The blond boy smirks.

Narcissa tosses her head back giggling and shortly after, Lucius joins in. When their laughter dies down to heavy breath, Narcissa lays her head on her husband's narrow chest and sighs. "I missed this." She murmurs.

A warm hand rubbing her back Lucius hums his agreement. "Yes, it's refreshing isn't it?"

A smile worming its way to her lips, Narcissa hides her face in Lucius's shoulder. "Indeed."

* * *

**What do you guys think? I think this chapter's kind of sweet isn't it? I feel like Narcissa and Lucius would be kind of mushy when they're alone. Anyway, thank you for reading and those who reviewed last chapter _Regency, KodeV, Wingnutdawn, Kitty, Clair Shadows and Trapezefixe. _I hope you guys continue to do so and thanks a ton for reading! I appreciate it:) By the way, who should be next Remus or James?**


	7. Unto What Gods do I call

**_Unto What Gods do I Call_**

* * *

A cooling zephyr toys with Remus's mousey brown hair and somewhere in the distance, a cow bell rattles; with a comfortable sigh, Remus situations himself feet dangling in the air above him as he flops his head back to scan the expanses of field land upside down. Smiling to himself, he picks up his perspiring glass of lemonade from the worn porch boards and takes a sip, giggling at himself when he spills some down his cheek. How strange it is, he muses, to be here, to be a child. Remus knows he should worry; should be upset, seeking out others-help-yet when is he ever going to get to enjoy a lazy summer day with his mother only ten feet away in the kitchen again? He'd thought never once, but now...it's here and he plans to take it to his full advantage.

Beating his heals against his porch swing's back frame to a song only he knows, Remus steals back a grin and reaches for the book he found in his room just this morning. He remembers this one, he thinks, it's about a dragon rider who's out to slay a monster and save its captive; a beautiful princess. It's like a many stories he'd enjoyed in his youth, where good _always _comes out triumphant. Some of his glee falls away and quickly filled with sobering wonders; had they...had they won in the end? What of Harry? His son, Teddy? With a growl he shakes his head furiously banishing the worries from mind trying to regain his previous merriment.

A pop sounds not far off and lift his head sideways to scan the fields he sees his father slowly walking to the family home, sack slung over one shoulder. The long grass sloshed as the man nears and Remus watches face blank and mind ablaze. _Dad..._how he loathed and loved the man, for all his love, for all his kindness, he was faint of heart, incapable of facing or acknowledging his son's _condition_ and leaving his wife to age years in a matter of a day, all alone and without support. Reaching the porch steps, the man's face light's up in a relieved smile and he greets "Hello Remus."

"Dad" Remus calls back cooly, twisting around so he's upright in his seat. Lumbering up the stairs, the man comes over to ruffle Remus's hair, but stops short eyes widening with horror.

"What's the matter dad?" Remus inquires with false innocence, knowing just what's upset his father so.

Letting his eyes glint an inhuman gold once more, Remus gives his father a smile full of teeth and jokes "I'm not gonna bite dad," as his father's face grows ashen, Remus can't help but add cruelly; "not now anyway."

The screen door creaks and Remus whips his head around to see his mother's displeased face, a damp dish towel in hand. "Stop it Remus." She scolds and the disapproval fades away to become elation at the sight of her husband. "Welcome home Love." His mother says to his father craning her neck to peck a kiss to the werewolf's father's pale jaw.

"Samantha." Remus's father murmurs, one arm wrapping around her shoulders; his eyes, though, do not leave Remus. The werewolf smiles pleasantly and pretends like nothing's different. "Samantha.." His father starts and mother sighs.

"I think he's hit his head, he's been acting...oddly...since he...woke up." She explains to her husband stilted and selective in her word choice.

His father bobs his head and whispers "I could-"

"We don't have he money..."

"If he's hurt we can't just ignore it."

"I know, but-"

"Sam."

"Why don't we wait and see if he worsens?" Remus's mother proposes in the end and his father exhales, running a hand through his prematurely thinning hair.

"I'm right here." Remus decides to tell them.

Mother smiles at him and crouches down laying a damp hand on his cheek. "I know sweetheart."

Remus fidgets and grumbles. "Don't talk like I'm not."

"Alright." His mother agrees, leaning in hugging him quickly before backing off; all eyes on her husband. "Tea, love?" She asks.

"Yes please." Father nods and he lets his wife lead him by the hand into the home, but his gaze lingers on his son. Remus pretends to read his book until father's disappeared into the home, then slowly, quietly, rising to his feet peers into the house through the open doorway. His features shift to one of contempt as mother's thin hands place a plate of food in front of father. He doesn't deserve mother's kindness, not a coward like him...

Remus's gut twists, but isn't he a coward too? Too afraid to stand up for victims, too afraid to stick around when things turn rough...no. Remus proved himself, he knows he did! He stayed, he fought for a better world, a better world for _his _son.

Remus swallows thickly and blinks back a swell of tears. _Dora..._oh pour Dora, she's not even _born _yet. Briefly, he wonders how Andromeda is fairing. If she might be...well, like him. His finger itches, he wants to contact her; write a letter maybe. Alas, she's a _Black _and Remus knows how his father feels about those uppity pure-bloods and if she doesn't know him...wouldn't it confuse her more to receive a letter from a boy not _even _in Hogwarts?

Groaning in anger, Remus throws himself away from the door and runs out into the yard. Finding a rock along a dirt path, he picks it up and throws the rock into the distance hoping to dispel the anger that's taken a hold of him. It's never good to be angry, it makes the wolf stronger, feral. "Why?" He screams at the sky, at the world. "Why did you do this to me?" He finishes, voice little more than a whisper anger depleted and sorrow working fast to take up its place.

Tears leak down his flushed cheeks, but Remus doesn't wipe them away at first. Instead, he lets them fall and dry in the early day sun. Grass rustles behind Remus and with a quick wipe of his arm he scrubs away the tear tracks leaving raw, itching skin behind. A tall figure's shadow comes to loom over him and Remus has to keep himself from bristling in annoyance. "What's on your mind son?" His father implores quietly, not once looking at the werewolf.

The boy glances sideways and frowns. "What do you mean?" He demands.

"You've been...aytipcally bitter today." His father explains haltingly and Remus snorts.

"That all?" He inquires, faintly amused.

His father's brows raise to his receding hairline and he murmurs. "It's not like you Remus, not at all."

"Things change dad." He answers.

"I think you mother might be right." His father mutters more to himself than Remus. "We should call up a healer."

" I haven't hit my head!" Remus shouts. "I just..." The werewolf trails off. "A dream I had," He begins. "It's been bothering me more and more lately..."

"Tell me about it." His father suggests. Remus does; he tells him of his boyhood at Hogwarts, about the gang of mischievous and not always kind-hearted friends he made, the ever-popular and loyal-to-the-end James, the rash and headstrong Sirius, who never knew when to_ stop, _the friend with quiet appraising eyes, who turned traitor when all was done, and in his explanation slips in another boy, one with knowledgable eyes that knew more and scared more than he could understand, a boy who attracted misfortune like no other, one who he allowed to be terrorized and ostracized and because of his passiveness the mere thought of this boy will always fill Remus with guilt. He tells about the evil sorcerer that will one day call himself Voldermort and the discord he will bring, fear and oppression trailing right behind. He tells him about his adventures all across the world, about his wife, how lovely, how kind, how _strong _and _brave _she was, even at the end. And Remus tells him about the son he waited so long to have, the child that suited his mother in appearance and smiled at _him _just like _her._ He tells of the final battle, the chaos, the terror, and the pain it rought on him (_everyone) _up to the point of his death. When Remus finishes his tale in little more than a wisp of his voice, son and father are silent for a time. Eventually, the man clears his throat. "Quite the dream Remy." His father offers in the end.

Remus shrugs and whispers softly. "Sometimes, it feels like I lived it."

His father's large hand reaches out and ruffles his son's brown locks. Remus lifts his gaze up and sees _fear _in his father's eyes, another trouble on top of trouble; Remus wishes then he hadn't added to the burden his father carried. No doubt the man thought the lycanthropy is turning him mad. Remus's feels his body begin to quiver and he thinks father will never say anything to him ever again, when father's voice cracks."Dreams are sometimes surreal in that way." He says. "With an imagination like that, maybe you could be a writer someday." He tells his son looking so very hopeful and anxious.

Remus stills. A writer...what an absurd idea, Remus gapes at first; slowly, though, his mind's wheels turn and he ponders, why not? It's not like anyone would ever know the truth. Remus certainly didn't plan to let his life follow the same course it did the first time. Smiling up at his father for the first time that day (many days, weeks, months, even), Remus chirps with boyish enthusiasm. "Yeah! Why not?" Laughing (sobbing), he throws his arms around his father's waist and hugs him. "Thanks dad!"

The man is rigid in surprise, but then he melts and hugs the werewolf back. "Your welcome son." He whispers, voice gruff and emotional. Remus clings tighter, wondering if it isn't impossible to make up for the misplaced anger and blame of his youth; he prays it's not.

* * *

**There's Remus for you, what do you guys think of him? Good? Bad? So-so? Could I improve him somehow? I plan to do James next (suggestions please), but in a moment of inspiration I wrote up a new chapter of Lily and Severus and am not sure if I should post that one first...Thanks for reading and reviewing guys, how about a minimum of three reviews this chapter? Is that too much to ask of you? I do appreciate all feedback; I love it when you do and keep suggestions, opinions, praise, critiscm in mind when I write my story. Thank you all again!**


	8. Rate Yourself and Rake Yourself

_**Rate Yourself and Rake Yourself**_

* * *

Mother thinks he's sick. Father thinks it's just a phase. And James, James doesn't say a word. He mopes (mourns) around his childhood home in the quiet darks rooms of the manor when mother orders him out of his bedroom, he doesn't run, he doesn't yell, he doesn't cause trouble. At meals, he watches mother twist and turn her wedding band on her slim finger and all James can think of how precious that ring had appeared on _his _wife's hand. Father, for once, has to seek _James _out when he comes home from his long hours at the ministry and wrangle hugs and kisses that just days earlier had been given effortlessly. James hides and skirts out of interaction with his mother and father; it's a game of cat and mouse somedays, mother sweeping the manor for her dark-haired child father casting point me spells when he comes home, but surprisingly, James isn't the blundering boy they remember. He's a boy with a man's experiences and knowledge, it's from his short stint as an Aurora he learned to disappear from view.

It's one late night-hours after his parents had found him and forced him to bed-that James is up and ghosting through his family home as if he's as ethereal as he thought he would be after death (but his hearts still beats, he still greedily gulps air when he knows his son and the wife he remembers no longer do; that he is sure of), in one of the long and ornate halls a small shape sashays towards him. The thing approaches and in a scatter of starlight he sees a pair of green (like his wife's, like his son's) eyes turn up at him and glint with secrets. Crouching, he reaches down and scratches the black cat behind the ear. "Hey there Nettle." He murmurs, James remembers once how he wanted a familiar for a cat, just like mother, until Sirius talked him out of it third year saying an owl was better because then they could write to each other all the time, (James conceeds in the end, but years after he still dreamt of silent shadows with fae orbs of green).

The cat circles around Jame's short legs, tale lingering as if to seduce, when it turns away from Jame abruptly; gaze locked down the winding hall towards the kitchen. "What is it girl?" Jame inquires curiously, the cat casts him a single look before striding down the hall. Jame frowns, how odd, he ponders. In a fit of romanticism James believes her to want him to follow, so without a second guess he trails after the cat and blinks in the darkness at the dampened light spilling from the kitchen. Pattering to the door, he drops to his knees and squints into the crack between the floor and door. Two pairs of feet lay behind the door, one in boots the other ballet flats. The flats pace the room while the boots stay steady and sure glued to their spot, abruptly, the flats swivel on their heels and point themselves at the boots.

"We need to call a healer." His mother's voice mutters through the door.

"It's a phase." Father argues and james heart begins to hammer in his throat.

"It's not!" His mother all but shouts, "It started after that...nightmare, if you want to _even _call it that." She finishes in a murmur of consonants James can hardly make sense of at first.

His father gives an aggrieved sigh and answers back. "What _else _could it be if not a nightmare?"

"Someone could have attacked him! It's possible!" His mother argues. Father's finger's tap against a hard surface and James just knows he's waiting for his mother to see how ridiculous she sounds. "You've made more than one enemy John! And that Malfoy is not the only one you've _accidentally _hurt!" She shouts at him and James hears a cup clatter to the table, gut twisting, he fears what's to come next.

"I know that! Don't you think I know that?!" James's father demands upset. "But, why would they attack _my _son when they have me?" He finishes quieter and uncertain.

"Oh John!" His mother sobs. "Please, let's just call a mind healer? Please love?"

"...if he's not himself in the morning." His father finally replies and the answer leaves Jame's sweating. _They'll know, they'll know_! James mind screams at him, they'll know James isn't their son any longer, they'll know what a failure he turned out to be, they'll know he let his _son and wife die_! James's scrambled mind is interrupted when Nettle suddenly runs herself against his side causing him to jump away from the door. A second later said door opens and in the hall's inky colors he sees his father and mother hand in hand stroll down the hallway and to the wing where the bedrooms lay.

"Should we check up on Jamie, just in case?" His mother yawns, leaning her head of black curls upon his father's shoulder.

"He's fine Jenna." Father sighs fondly.

"I suppose your right..." Mother snuffles, cuddling closer to her husband. When they're gone from sight, James's heart begins to settle and Nettle turns her head to face him green eyes glowing, (tempting him, _follow me, _they say).

James doesn't know what to make of anything at this point, but he does know his luck is due to this cat. With an age-old sigh, he reaches out and rubs Nettle's ear. "Good kitty." He says and then getting to his feet scoops her into his arms, muttering "Guess you could sleep with me." The cat purrs content and dissolves in his arms like a goo. James barks a laugh, "You _crazy _cat."

Padding down the hall to his own room, James holds back a yawn as his eyes droop. _Funny, I haven't felt tired for days..._Opening his bedroom door, he nearly appears in front of his bed and falls into the mused sheets Nettles curling up on his chest. Blinking against sleep, James whines."Why'd ya have to make m' tired?" The cat sends him a withering stare and proceeds to knead her paws into his stomach, the boy gives a sleepy giggle and fighting no longer, sleep overcomes him.

* * *

"Jamie." A hushed voice calls into the blackness, "love, time to wake up." The person insists and with a groan, James lets the darkness fall away to usher in the light of day.

Opening his eyes, instead of seeing Nettles night-fur resting on his chest, he gazes up at his mother's care-worn face inches above; her eyes adoring and loving, but James knows more is hiding in them if he cares to look (he doesn't). "Mum?" He mumbles, playing up his childishness as he reaches skyward to hug her around the neck; Mother's eyes grow wide in surprise, but he feels the tension in her shoulders melt to nothing.

Her hands flutter at her side as if she can't believe it, before they come to cradle his dark head and she hides her face in his hair as she cries. "Jamie-!"

Feigning panick, James squirms and asks. "What's wrong mum?"

"Oh James, Jamie, _love_" Mother hiccups, "You don't _know _how _happy _you make your mother."

"Happy?" James remarks. "You're _crying _mum." James states, trying to leave her hold if only to wipe away her tears.

"They're happy tears love." His mother tells him, finally letting James squirm away so they can see each others faces.

"Happy for _what_?" James demands.

"Oh-" His mother starts, but then with a nervous flicker of her eyes about the room begins to censor her words. "You've been _strange _these past days, _quiet,_ I suppose is the right word; it's not like you love." She explains.

James gazes at her silently before bursting out in a round of laughter. "_Mummy_!" He shrills, "I wasn't acting _odd _I was _thinking_!"

Some of mother's unease returns and she comments. "I don't believe I want you thinking if this is what happens."

James snickers and cuddles into his mother's side, like he remembers doing when he was a boy and says impishly "I'll be rather _dim_ if I _don't _think mummy."

Mother snorts and one of her hands comes to cup Jame's head to her cheek. "Yes, I suppose your quite right; but whatever were you thinking about that made you so quiet?" She implores, squeezing him tightly (a bit unnecessarily too, James believes).

"Just stuff mum." James says vaguely, at the disapproving wilt of his mother's lips; James lets his eyes wander to her hand. On it, his gaze catches sight of her golden wedding band imbedded with a diamond and rubies circling it on her ring finger. "Like, someday, I'll give _my _wife your wedding ring; her eyes will compliment the red amazingly." He whispers to her, plump fingers tracing the jewels of the ring.

Mother is silent for a long while, James fears she thinks something's wrong with him again when she bends her head and kisses his cheek soundly. "You'll make a wonderful husband someday James." She tells him in hushed reverence.

"Maybe." James says eventually, but he knows that it's a lie; he's proven his worth as a husband already. He's one who fails not only in saving his wife, but his child too and it's this thought that brings James to tears; he holds the stinging dam of salt water back, though, for he cannot cry for his losses now. Not if he wants to prove to his wife, _himself,_ he can redeem his value and rescue his family once and for all.

* * *

**What do you guys think of James, I made him feel pretty guilty didn't I? I'm not sure if I like this chapter too much, but I hope you guys enjoyed it. It's also a little shorter, but I found it more struggle to write James; one he's not my favorite and I feel like he's a character that can turn out very flat and one-dimensional if you aren't careful when writing him. He can either turn out being this martyr or the biggest asshole of forever. So yeah, please _review _and thank you all a ton for reading!**


	9. I'll Show Thee the Way,

_**I'll Show Thee the Way, Through all the Pain and the Sorrows**_

* * *

His eyes opened. Pushing himself up on sore arms, Severus felt his body scream and rebel against the simplest actions of waking. He cringes and takes a deep breath causing the little girl beside him to stir with a low hum. Freezing, Severus waits hoping that his bed companion will not open her eyes. Prayers answered, Lily's face settles and a sleepy sigh tosses away from her, causing the long hair drapped about her face to flutter in the air like a bout of flames. Severus stares at her mesmerized, how long has it been since he had Lily all to himself? But no matter how content he feels in one moment, it's as quick to change as a shifting wind, a breath, no, this feeling won't last.

Slipping out of the lace and frills, Severus stifles a yawn behind the sleeve engulfing his child hand. His eyes catch a glimpse of a stain on the on the white sleeve as he pulls it away. Bringing it up to eye level, Severus studies it with an intensity he usually uses for measuring potion ingredients. Though, instead of the feeling of satisfaction that comes with knowing he's once again successfully chopped his ingredients to correct measures; he feels foreboding, the stain on the sleeve, it's _blood_. Breath quickly turning ragged, Severus slowly twists around craning his neck to see rust colored stains upon the virgin sheets where he laid only a minute before. A sick, panicky feeling clouding his thoughts, he darts from the room and to the bathroom he used the night before; _maybe...my clothes are still there..._He hopes desperately. He doesn't want to stick around, not when the Evans learns he's ruined what little they gave him.

Speeding down the bedroom hall, he narrowly misses running into Mrs. Evan as she comes out of her bedroom in a pink bathrobe and hair styled in odd angles from sleep. Toppling over from the loss of balance, Severus can't help but hiss as he jars his wounds and causes his aches to flare. Mrs. Evans bare feet come to stand beside him and in a quavering, uncertain voice she whispers "Severus?"

Slowly, Severus raises his shadow eyes to meet a pair of common brown. "Mrs. Evans." He grunts trying to push himself up on weak arms and knees. His muscles give out underneath him and he gasps. Before he can struggle again, slim arms wind around his middle and easily lift him from the hard floor.

"Oh you poor, _poor_, boy." She murmurs cradling him close to her, her eyes only conveying pity as far as Severus cares.

Indignant and embarrassed, Severus snaps. "Do _not _feel _sorry _for _me_!" This startles Mrs. Evans and her stare becomes shocked. Fussing and wriggling, Severus growls. "I'm not one of _your _children and I _know _you only took me in the night before because of my appearance! If I had come any other time, _after _I had cleaned myself up and hidden my injuries you would have told me to get off your _property_ without a second thought about why I was there. It wouldn't have mattered if I was Lily's _friend _or _not_!" He finishes his rant, huffing and puffing. Severus refuses to glance up at Lily's mother, he doesn't want to know what she's going to do with him.

"Your-Your _right_!" Mrs. Evans sobs falling to the ground on her knees, pressing the boy in her arms closer to her breast as she cries into his greasy, neglected hair. Severus stills and after a beat his dark eyes rise to meet her own and the woman can only cry harder at the astonishment. Had anyone ever told this boy, _this child_, they had failed him and not the other way around? Her tears seem to distress him and he begins to fidget against her, eventually he reaches out and pats one of her hands.

"It's okay. I would have told any dirty child that came to _my _house to get off my porch too." He says to her, and Lily's mother knows he's trying to apologize for making her cry. But it only makes her feel worse, the child shouldn't be apologizing for trying to find haven from his demons.

"Oh no, _never _say that again sweetheart." She tells the boy, gripping his chin firmly in her fingers to make him gaze up in her eyes and see how serious she is. "We were _wrong_, no one should _ever_ judge another _human being_ on their appearances." She elaborates and the boy's face swirls with confusion and incomprehension. But, that's alright, he's never know anything else and it will be her and her husband's job to teach him from now on.

Mrs. Evans-" He starts, but Julie shakes her head.

"Call me Julie." She offers. This, disturbs the boy and he begins to shift against her once more.

"Julie-" He stops abruptly, her name ending in a strangled sound. The woman doesn't say a word and waits for him to continue. His mouth flops open and then clenches shut as he takes a deep body shaking breath. "I _can't _stay." He finally utters.

"What? You can't expect me to just let you go back to those _mon_-" Julie's tirade cuts off early by Severus's anguished eyes.

"_He'll _find me, I _know _he will." The child voices, sounding so very tiny and afraid.

"We'll move." Lily's mother answers aggressively. "Across country if we have to."

"But-" Severus fights.

"You _aren't _going back young man." She orders.

"What you're doing, it's _kidnapping_!" He rushes out in one pained breath.

"Any court will agree with us;" She begins, tone measured and careful, "that he was going to _kill _you."

"Just as many will think I deserve it." Severus mutters glum and despondent to her argument.

"We'll run away as many times as we need to." Julie argues.

The child's face lifts and he gazes at her critically, in a way that's far too adult for her comfort. "I see where Lily get's her _romanticism _from." He comments.

Julie finds herself blushing and counters a bit too zealously in her opinion; "Paul will agree with me!" But she knows it's a fib and that this conversation is settled for the time being.

Footsteps come from the room adjacent to them, tilting her head sideways, Julie instinctively hides the little boy in her arms by curling around him.

"Mum?" Her eldest daughter calls.

"Yes love?" She asks, glancing up to see Petunia's long face gaze down at her and the child in her arms with slitted eyes.

"What's _he _doing here?" She growls, tense and ready to spring.

"He's Lily's friend." She answers simply.

"So? I don't see why that accounts for why your _holding_ _him mother_." Petunia presses, voice dropping to a hiss.

Sniffing delicately at her daughter's ill temperament, Julie rises to her feet; (he weighs nothing at all in her arms). "Youre father and I are planning to keep him." She answers, swishing down the hall and to the bathroom.

Staring open-mouthed at her mother's back, Petunia hurries after and cries. "You don't _mean _that do you?"

"I do." Her mother asserts, flicking on the light in the bathroom as she enters.

"You _can't_!" Petunia yells.

"Why not?" The older woman asks as she places Severus on the bathroom counter.

"Because-" The pre-teen quiets suddenly as she sees the reflection of the Spinner's End boy peeking out around her mother's. Gaunt circles surround his eyes and one even seems to be swelled, his lip is split and there's a browned bandage taped to a spot on his forehead. "Oh." She whispers.

"Can he stay Petunia?" Her mother aks, but not really.

"Uh-huh." The brunette mumbles, even she is not so cruel as to send a boy back to certain death.

"Lovely, we can all be one big happy family now." Severus snarks as Petunia's mother pulls the first-aid kit from the cupboard bellow the sink.

"Watch it mister." Her mother rebukes and Petunia finds it oddly strange but fitting as Severus glances down at his lap and whispers;

"Ssorry." Lisping adorably because of his missing front tooth.

Her thin mouth lifting in the briefest smile, Petunia leans against the door frame and tells her mother. "I don't mind."

Closing the cupboard door with a thud, Julie grunts; "Good, I have a feeling that lip of his is going to be a common occurence" as she begins to sift through the supplies in the first aid-kit.

Severus makes a less than pleased face and Petunia can't help but giggle. A cheery smile later, she inquires. "Would you like me to start making the eggs and toast?"

"Would you Pet?" Her mother implores, twisting her neck to glance over at her daughter.

Severus grins devil-like. "Yes, would you _Pet_?" He echoes, thumping his feet gleefully against the counter.

"Hush Severus." Her mother whispers as Petunia screws up her lips ready to retort, when a wail comes from down the hall.

Shifting her gaze down the hallway, Petunia sighs. "That's Lily."

"No doubt wondering what happened to her friend." Her mother mutters, her eyes not wavering from her work as she tries to clean up a struggling Severus's injuries. "Stop squirming!" She demands in annoyance.

"I can do it myself!" Is the opposing cry.

Blinking lazily between her mother and the bedroom down the hall, the twelve-year-old offers. "Want me to get Lily?"

"Please." Her mother agrees, dabbing at Severus's lip with cloth. Bobbing her head, Petunia wonders down the hall into her baby sister's room to find Lily sitting in her bed face streaked with tears.

"What's wrong?" Petunia scowls, hands on her budding hips.

"Sevs gone!" She hiccups.

Rolling her eyes in exasperation, Petunia juts a thumb at the doorway and says. "He's in the bathroom with mum getting his scrapes redressed." Lily perks up at the news and with a quick swipe of her arm beneath her trickling nose rockets down the hall with a delighted shriek of "Sev!"

With a dramatic sigh, Petunia throws her hands in the air and grumbles to no one. "Is it _always _going to be _this _mad around here?

"It just might Pet, it just might." A voice chuckles from the hall and the girl made of angles twirls around to find her father's pleasant face in the doorway.

"Daddy!" She shouts throwing herself at the man. "Why didn't you come in?" She asks.

"You were handling it." He says with a shrug. Holding out the crook of his arm he implores. "I do believe I heard you say would make breakfast?"

Petunia smiles and nods. "Eggs and toast."

Rubbing his stomach, Paul exclaims. "Sounds great Pet!" A short time later the house fills with the clatter of dishes and the happy chatter of children.

* * *

**This chapter actually managed to end on a happy note! I hope you all like this chapter and I want to know if Petunia didn't seem too out of character. She's still pretty young at this point and I was thinking the sight of a battered Severus might just shock her enough into being a bit more accepting of him, (for the time being anway). Now, what I want to know from you guys is who I do next and if you have suggestions about what should happen to them; I have some ideas in mind for the Blacks and Lucius at this point, but Remus and James (sort of) are up in the air. So, please, pretty please, review everyone and thank you a ton for reading!**

***Special thanks to Stellar for the new story title suggestion; _We can Begin the World all Over Again _I fell in love with it at first sight. And to my other reviewers; New Moongirl, KodeV, Kindli and Lon Wolfgood.***


	10. And Those Secrets Hidden

**_And Those Secrets Hidden on Our Childish Lips_**

* * *

It's the first time that her parents leave them alone. They leave Petunia in charge on that damp summer day, father at work and mother out trying to procure the necessary papers to enroll Severus in the upcoming semester. The three children are left in front of the living room's small telly, hot and sweaty; yet too bored to consider finding cooler air else where in the house. Strewned at an odd angle, Lily watches with blank eyes as the weather man jabbers on about the upcoming weekend weather and not for the first time wishes she were at Hogwarts._ James_...her mind calls and Lily chances a glance at Severus who appears just as under-stimulated as she feels. She wants to ask him for the billionth time if she can contact James, but he will no doubt refuse.

"_Not until I'm contacted._" He told her the first time she asked,

"_By who?_" She demanded at his unsatisfactory answer, he sent her a look next that made _her _feel like she was the prat for asking.

Lily has been constantly needling her friend the past week in an attempt to make him spill, but it seemed in the time she had last spent time with Severus and his death he learned a thing or two about being tight-lipped (not that he hadn't been before, but Lily had _always _managed to get a scrap from him). With a tired groan, Lily whines "I'm _bored_."

"Belt up!" Her older sister snaps from her lounging position on the couch, a Nancy Drew mystery novel covering her eyes.

Huffing, Lily grumbles. "Can't make me." How she hates her sister's attitude.

"Yeah?" Her sister demands, now sitting up and glaring straight at Lily.

"Uh-huh!" Lily rebuttals. Eyes sparking nastily; Petunia's thin lips part into a sneer, but before she can get a word out, the door bell rings.

"Get that." Her sister orders, sinking back into the couch. Lily sputters and tries to protest, yet Petunia only turns the volume up on the telly.

"So not _fair_!" Lily cries, getting up on her feet and stomping to the front door.

"Remember to smile Lils!" Her older sister calls after her, voice airy and deliciously pleased.

Grinding her teeth, Lily opens the front door and bares her teeth in a harsh smiled. "Can I help you?" She inquires, staring up curiously at the haggard woman with eyes as black as Severus's. The woman wrings her hands and glances each way before turning her attention back to Lily.

"I-I" She stammers, realizing how she must be coming off to Lily; the woman takes a very deep, rattling breath and whispers "I'm looking for my son, Severus?" At Lily's uncomprehending (shocked) face, the dark eyes become a size larger and she pleads. "I remember once, he mentioned meeting a little wi-girl by the name of Lily." She concludes, gazing so longingly at Lily that the girl almost right there sells out her friend.

"Who is it Lily?" Severus questions coming up behind her.

The woman's face perks up and her eyes begin to water, "Get back!" She barks at her friend, heart hammering in her throat as she hurries to shove the door closed.

"Severus?" His mother cries, foot surreptitiously coming between the door and the jam. Lily gazes on in horror as Severus's face looses what little color it has as he begins to quake. "Love, are you alright? It's time to come home, your father's not angry any longer." The woman tells her child, struggling to shimmy around the half closed-door as Lily presses against it with all her might.

"Sev! Go hide!" Lily shouts at her friend as her sweaty palms slip and slide against the door.

"You little brat! Don't tell _my _son what to do!" Severus's mother growls and one discolored hand pops around the door coming within a breath's length of Lily's face. Lily falls back startled, allowing the woman to get around the door and into the house. She spits at Lily and sneers "Dirty mudblood." Lily feels like she's in Fifth year again, but this time, she feels even more powerless. Taking a step towards her shaking son, Eileen crouches down and holds out a hand like one would to a timid animal. "Love, it's time to come home." She says to the boy. Severus cringes and topples backwards when his foot stumbles on the hall rug. He gives a hurt noise and curls into a ball, his mother frowns and hisses "Come along Severus, there's no time for games."

"No!" Severus chokes out, and Lily realizes then that her _bravest_ friend is _crying._

"What?" His mother demands, lips twisting into a arcid grimace and Lily fears that the woman will strike Sev.

Footfall comes from behind suddenly and Lily looks up to see Petunia's her eyes tight in fear and in her white fingers grip is the phone. Taking a deep breath she belows"Hey! You get out of here before I call the cops on you!"

Severus's mother's head jerks up and she stares at Petunia eyes alight with anger. "Cops?" She mocks. "What could a couple of bloody _muggles _do to _me?" _

Bravely (stupidly, Severus and Petunia will tell her later), Lily blurts "What your husband does to you and your son."

The woman's head snaps around and her gaze glinting with insanity settles on Lily. "You little-" She starts, taking a step towards the young girl hands outstretched ready to claw into her face when a shout comes from behind her.

"Avada Kedavra!" A verdant glow engulfs the room while a bolt of green hits the woman, Lily and Petunia scream as Severus's mother falls to the floor like a puppet without a master. Eyes slowly lifting from the dead body, Lily gazes down the hall to see Severus's pale tear streaked face staring straight back at her. "I had to." He whispers voice hoarse. "I couldn't-" a sob falls unbidden from his lips and he curls in hiding his face in his knees. "She was going to _kill_ you!" His muffled declaration carries throughout the hall.

"Oh my _god_." Petunia utters, one hand floating just in front of her white face while the other clutches at her middle. "You're-You're-" The girl stammers.

"Don't!" Lily yells, "Don't you dare!"

Petunia doesn't listen and she shrieks "Murder!"

Severus moans and hiccups "C-Couldn't-! Not a-again!"

"They'll send us to jail!" Petunia wails hysterically, fingers tugging at her hair.

"Shut up!" Lily roars at her older sister. "We won't! _Magic _killed her, no one will ever know what made her die!" Petunia continues to sniffle, but Lily's explanation seems to calm her enough for her to abate her tears. Getting up from the floor, Lily moves to close the front door and then turns to her accomplices. "We need a plan." She says to them.

"Tell them the truth." Severus mumbles, chin resting on his fist as he gazes mournfully at his mother's corpse.

"The _truth_?!" Petunia squeals, "Like _that _will go over well."

Severus scowls and with narrowed eyes sneers. "You'll see." Shifting his attention away he orders Lily "Call the cops." Lily listens.

"Hello? Ummmm there's a dead lady in my house." She tells the person on the other side of the line.

* * *

"Can you explain that again?" The police officer sighs, running a hand through his thinning hair.

"She was lookin' for Sev, she got inside and then I told her you guys would beat her up like Sev's daddy beats 'em up and when she was going to come at me, she fell down." Lily explains for the thousandth time, tiny feet tapping a steady beat against the leg of her couch, by this time mum had come home and whisked Petunia off to comfort her in the safety of her bedroom and now only a sullen Severus and herself were left to talk to the cop.

"Yes, I understand that she fell, but _why_?" He questions in a low growl.

Severus shudders and with a scowl Lily snaps ""cause Sev yelled abra kadabra!"

The man only looks a hundred times more bewildered and with a groan scribbles down a note in his notepad before standing up. "Tell your mother I'll be in touch."

Lily relaxes then and gives the man a sunny grin. "Okay sir! Bye!" And she follows the man out on to the porch before coming back to the living room to see Severus curled up against one arm of the sofa. Lily stares at him; she's worried about Severus, but...she's also a bit scared of him. What had happened to him since she last called him her friend, she knew he'd been heading towards the dark, but he'd seemed to have changed since then. Now, she wasn't so sure.

"You think I'm evil don't you?" Severus mutters, voice hoarse and bleak.

Lily can't lie, she's not Slytherin enough to hack it. "I don't know." She answers simply.

"I love-loved-her too, you know." He tells Lily, night eyes meeting her emerald-green.

"Then why?" Lily demands, why would you kill someone you love?

"She...Lily you weren't _there. _She just _stayed _there curled up on the ground and let him _beat _me." He says to her and Lily feels the need to rebuke, to tell him she gets it; yet...he has a point. She wasn't there. Wheezing lowly, Severus pushes on to say. "She's my _mother_, I-I can't _not _love her...but when she was going to-to-" and he's hyperventilating.

"Oh Sev!" Lily cries, rushing to his side and patting his back. She doesn't understand, not one bit, but she knows something desperate and aching made him act out in the way he did and Lily knows someday she'll learn why; though, if she'll understand is still uncertain. "It's okay, it's okay I don't hate you." She tells him over and over. Slowly, but surely, Severus does calm down and after some time he lifts his eyes to meet hers.

"Why don't you?" He asks.

"Don't what?" Lily frowns.

"Hate me." He mumbles around his knees.

Lily pauses. Why doesn't she? He's a murderer and that is someone Lily thought she'd never fall low enough to allow in her company, but..."Because you'll always be my best friend first." She replies and she finds it's the truth, no matter what happens, Severus will always be her friend first.

Severus's eyes fall closed and his taut body sags against her side. "Thank you." He murmurs.

"Always." Lily whispers letting her fire hair flow around them like a blanket of protection as she rests her head upon his shoulder.

* * *

**Well, I didn't exactly see that coming until I started writing but I feel like it's the right way to go. So tell me what you think, and who you want the next chapter to be on? Thank you for reading and please review!**

**BTW a reviewer mentioned I should find a Beta, for grammatical and spelling errors; I think the suggestion has merit. Does anyone have suggestions?**


	11. Once The Paper's Crumpled Up

**_When The Paper's Crumpled up it can't be Perfect Again_**

* * *

In the deadness, only the faint sound of bare feet scratching across the carpet as they pace the length of the room in front of the glowing embers of the mantle reminds Andromeda she isn't the only one in this stomach sickening plight of _waiting. _Blinking slowly, Andromeda's eyes wonder to the clock hung above the fireplace and sees with a clarity she doesn't even remember having, that the big hand is just past twelve and the little lays a quarter further; swallowing down her worry, Andromeda runs her fingers up and down the crochet blanket she remembers making one long summer when she was twelve. Abruptly, Bellatrix's pacing comes to an end and the younger sister glances up to see her lean body outlined by the glowing light of the hearth.

"She should be back by now." Her older sister remarks, not bothering to turn around.

Andromeda finds herself irked that her sister doesn't even think she needs to turn to speak to her, _how arrogant! _So, instead of trying to placate her sister Andromeda grumbles "Love does not keep track of time, _dear_ sister." Her sister doesn't so much as twitch; still not soothed, Andromeda sneers, "but surely you already knew this? Unless...you never _loved._"

Bellatrix whirls around at this; her face ablaze with fury, (but for all she searches no madness can be uncovered). "That's low and you know it." Bella hisses deadly and quiet.

With a sniff, Andy ignores the danger and lifts one delicate eyebrow drawling. "Is it?"

"You _haughty _prat!" Her dark-haired sister snarls and Andromeda chokes back a terrified shriek when her sister's sharp nails pinch the flesh of her arms through her cotton nightshift; gazing into her sister's eyes, Andromeda is scared at the true fire burning in them. "You think your _so _superior to me don't you?" Her sister growls. "_I'm _better than bonkers Bella, _I_ got _away, I _married a _good _man, _I _don't worship a _murderer,_ _I_ don't _kill_ innocents, _I'm _not _evil_!" Bellatrix spits, voice badly imitating Andromeda's own. Her teeth bare in a wild snarl "Well, at _least_ I'm not a _coward_!" She roars at the younger girl, Bellatrix's intensified grip no doubt leaving finger print bruises on Andromeda's upper arms.

Andromeda scrambles for a rebuttal while her lips stay stunned open unable to do more than splutter, Bellatrix releases her roughly and casts her gaze sideways hindering a direct reading of her sister's emotions. In the wan light, Andromeda watches on as her sister's chin trembles briefly before clenching into a steal-like ridge. "I think we should floo Lucius." She mutters turning away suddenly, most likely ashamed of her out burst; though, Andromeda cannot understand why, (she's done so much worse, why would she be ashamed of frightening Andromeda a little?)

Before Bellatrix can reach for the floo powder, the fire flares and out walks from the ashes is Narcissa. In that brief moment of bright light, Andromeda sees the pink flush upon her sister's usually pale cheeks and the early bruises blooming on her lips where no doubt Lucius had bitten only a short time earlier. Her chest constricts with envy, why should her sister have her husband and not her as well? "Have fun?" She snaps at the younger girl, making her recoil.

"Andromeda..." Narcissa murmurs.

"No!" She shouts. "You were only supposed to be gone for an hour! Look at the time now Narcissa!"

The girl reddens even further and her nimble fingers wring at her cloak as she argues "Things just took a little longer than-"

"No excuses!" Andromeda cries, cutting off her sister. "You broke your promise and that's all there is to it!" She declares.

"When did you become a Gryffindork sister?" Bellatrix inquiries from her corner of the room, silently shuffling through a set of loose parchments on her desk. "Where's that Slytherin composure we so highly prize?" Lifting her eyes to meet Andromeda's, she comments. "If you don't _control _yourself, mother and father will realize something strange has overcome us. Do you _wish _for them to hand us to Dark Lord?" She asks, the look she sends the younger teen nasty and cruel.

Tears escape Andromeda then and in her shame hides them behind a wall of dark curls. "No" she moans. Stalking over, Bellatrix brushes the thick hair aside and lifts her sister's chin making the younger meet her oddly, tender look.

Eyes clear and revealing her own pains, Bellatrix whispers; "you will bury these feelings sister, let no one know what you have lost." Andromeda doesn't feel comforted, but she does understand and therefore nods her agreement. A smile slices across Bella's face, but it is a shadow of the insane grin she wore once-upon-a-time and Andromeda exhales relief at this.

Bellatrix in a spur of affection, presses a kiss to her little sister's temple, then falls down beside her on the bed. Narcissa still waits by the fire, her uncertainty accented by the shadows playing on the contours of her face; Bellatrix smiles at the girl and pats at the bed between her and Andromeda.

"Have a seat 'cissa." The twelve-year-old walks over slowly and then gazes down at her spot, before sitting down hands crossed in her lap primly. Running a hand through the blond tangles, Bellatrix implores "What did you learn sister?"

"Lucius is as we are." She answers simply, her eyes never leaving the fireplace.

"Does he know anything we don't?" Andromeda asks, staring at the side of the younger's face; willing her to meet her own eyes.

"No." She replies, voice hushed and distant. The girl's eyes break from the fire then, with trembling body she gazes down at her lap and whimpers "I want him, I _need _to be with him."

"We can figure out something;" Bella comforts. "If Lucius starts to come calling, I'm sure father nor mother would mind." She tells the younger girl taking one of her shaking hands.

"Oh! But it's just so _awful_! He's all alone in that manor with only those bumbling elves for company!" She wails into her sister's neck.

Brushing the blond hair in thoughtful strokes, Bellatrix and Andromeda share a look of incomprehension. "What do you mean Narcissa? I know his father's sick, but..." Andromeda trails off, scooting closer to the younger girl.

"That's not the _half _of it." The girl snivels miserably. "He's _dead_ and Lucius can't let _anyone _know for fear someone would take advantage of him and his situation, nor because it would leave the child of the man who cursed him without a father and that is something Lucius's father could not live with." She explains to her sisters who can't help but feel betrayed.

"Why didn't _you _ever tells us this?" Andromeda questions.

Pulling away from Bellatrix's hold, Narcissa frowns deeply at her sisters and hisses. "I did not find out until I married Lucius that his father was dead and that was only because he had to, what would he have said to me when I asked to meet my father-in-law? 'I'm sorry, but he's not around'? Surely neither of you are simple enough to believe that he told me when we were _children._"

Andromeda ignores the barb, her sister and Lucius always had a strong...affinity for each other and it didn't seem unlikely the boy would have confided in _someone _after his father's death. "I don't know 'cissa." She answers with a shrug.

"We really don't know each other that well do we?" Bellatrix comments, eyes gazing off into the dying embers.

"No, I suppose we don't." Narcissa agrees.

Andromeda snorts into her hands. "I doubt that's the reason we're here, though, how absolutely _inane _would that be?"

Bellatrix turns her gaze to settle on the two younger girls lumped beside her on the bed. "Would it be, sister?" She inquires, voice a low rumble.

Andromeda for a moment looks ready to argue, but then her eyes become considerate and she cocks her head to the side. "Maybe not." She finally decides and Bellatrix accepts her decision with a nod of her head.

Narcissa slips her smaller hands into one of each her sisters and whispers. "If that is why, _I _think it's a very fine reason." Andromeda holds her tongue; she doesn't think so, yet...watching Bellatrix's face take on a gentleness she hasn't seen on her since they were all very small as she combs her long fingers through their baby sister's hair; makes her hope that, possibly, she is wrong.

They are all quiet for a time, none of them willing to break the first calm they've had since they're return. Unfortunately, all is not finished. "We are to see our cousins tomorrow," Bellatrix tells her younger sisters.

Andy groans. "I still don't know why they wish to see us."

"It is out of character for them...I think they are like us." Narcissa hums around a yawn.

"Most definitely." Bellatrix seconds. Seeing that her sister is beginning to drowse on her shoulder; she brings the girl to her lap cradling her. "Perhaps I should carry you to bed?" She implores.

Wrapping her arms around the older Black, Narcissa soaks up the comfort her older sister offers. "Please." She mumbles.

With a half-fake sigh of exasperation, Bellatrix teeters to a stand; Narcissa clinging to her. Bending down, she kisses Andromeda's head and says "Get some sleep Andy."

"I'll try." She answers, but she knows she won't; too many things stalk her in her dreams. Her older sister frowns at her, yet chooses not to argue with her.

"Good night." She concludes.

"G'night." Andromeda calls back, falling back on her bed with a soft thud. Bellatrix carries Narcissa from the room, closing the door behind her. The dark-haired girl strains her ears to listen as Bella puts Narcissa to bed and then as she returns to her own. She doesn't move for another hour before getting up and walking back to her moonlit desk. She has a letter to write. Even if Ted doesn't remember _them,_ that doesn't mean they can't be one again.

* * *

**I believe Andromeda would be the most disgruntled of the sisters, especially since her husband doesn't recall their past like Narcissa's husband does; (I also have a feeling Bellatrix wouldn't care much about her own). But, what do you guys think? Does this seem like a possible sentiment? Does anyone have suggestions for the next chapter? Like who it should be on, maybe? Because I think either the Black brothers or Lucius would be best. Also, any other ideas, suggestions, criticism and comments would all be welcome. Thank you to KodeV, Sarcasticval, Professor Radar, Ceti H. Black and Trapezefixe for reviewing last chapter. Thanks again for reading and please review!**


	12. Dog Days are Over

_**Dog Days are Over**_

* * *

Regulus tries hard not to fidget as his poised cousins filter through the floo, but for all his efforts he cannot help but drum his fingers against his thigh. Narcissa falters at the sight of him, something strange clouding her eyes (tears? No, Narcissa's always been too proud for those). In a matter of a few steps, Narcissa is knelt in front of him and hugging him close, (it frightens him).

"It's good to see you well Regulus, love." She whispers to him and the boy can only stare at his cousin with confounded, large, eyes. Sirius nudges him in the shoulder and Regulus scrabbles for an appropriate reply.

"You too." He finally mutters, blushing red and looking down at his feet. Narcissa hesitates, but she does stand up and moves to Sirius. Regulus watches from under his lashes as his cousin gives a strained greeting to his brother before backing away, if Regulus was one for fanciful thoughts, (which he is) he would say she's afraid of him.

Andromeda comes forward next, laying a cool kiss to his cheek and whispering into his ear; "stop fidgeting cousin, no need for nerves." Regulus stills at this, hands pulling themselves into fists. The pleasantries she exchanges with Sirius are warmer, maybe even proud. (Regulus squashes down jealousy he feels, all eyes are on Sirius, be they proud or disappointed; never will he compare). Bellatrix comes forward once Andromeda's fallen back beside Narcissa, but she does not give any welcomes; she stares at both of them.

The teenager scares Regulus, unpredictable, Bella's alway been. He waits, nearly shaking with an effort to stay _still. _Sirius-who's never had much patience-speaks first. "What Bellatrix?!" He barks, teeth barring into a growl. The young woman cocks her head to the side at this and an almost awed expression passes over her face.

"You-" She stops abruptly and takes a breath. "You _do _remember, don't you?" She murmurs, but it's more to herself than to Sirius or Regulus.

"What of you? What do _you _remember?" Sirius sneers, crossing his arms. Hurt briefly flashes across Bellatrix's face and it dawns on Regulus that his cousin is _different._

So, like any good brother, Regulus makes an effort to stop Sirius before he makes a fool of himself (like that's ever helped) "Belt up!" He snaps at the taller boy.

Sirius turns betrayed, vengeful eyes on him. "Still a little _weasel _are you?" He spits; taking a foot towards Regulus he grabs up his collar, nearly choking Regulus in the process. Regulus does his damnedest not to react (which really isn't saying much).

So, while Regulus sputters and coughs, scratching at his brother's arm; Narcissa shouts. "Put him down!" Her wand pointed at Sirius. Regulus's brother glances at her and scowls, no one moves for a breath. Eventually, Sirius snorts and lets Regulus go.

Heaving for breath, the younger only barely catches the next words tossed in this verbal battle. "Just as hasty as ever." Bellatrix remarks, looking at them with (almost) fond eyes.

"What's that suppose to mean?" Sirius demands through his clenched jaw, Bellatrix just smiles. "What does that bloody _mean_?!" Sirius howls.

Bellatrix turns around and gestures to the couches and tea set up just a few feet away from the hearth. "How about we talk about it over tea?" She inquires and Regulus looks from the corner of his eye to see Sirius seething, but incapable of doing anything other than nodding his head.

* * *

Cup of black tea in hand, Regulus stares on perplexed. The girls make benign chatter with one another while Sirius fumes in his spot refusing anything to eat or drink and acting as a bad host all together.

"Don't act so put-out Sirius, tea's supposed to be a light affair." Andromeda comments, reaching over and patting the little boy's knee.

Sirius grumbles something under his breath. "When are we going to _discuss _what you all came here for then?" He grinds out at last.

Casting sweeping looks about the room, Bellatrix pulls out her wand and casts a silencing charm on the study. "Any time your ready." She answers.

"What the bloody _hell _is _wrong _with you!" Sirius (expectedly) explodes.

Putting her dish down, Narcissa sniffs "And what of _you_?"

Sirius gapes at this. "What does _that _mean?"

"You acted so eager to have us, but once we're here? You behave no better than a common _dog_." She sneers and with that picks up her tea and takes a refined sip. Regulus watches and envies this ability, he wishes he could be as confident as Narcissa (as brave as Sirius, as secretive as Andromeda, as strong as Bellatrix, just _better_).

Sirius snaps his teeth at the girl and Regulus finds himself raising an eyebrow, just what happened to his brother since his death? Even before he was disowned, Sirius hadn't been so-_savage-_it makes Regulus's stomach naw at him strangely.

Quickly feeling like he was falling out of the loop, Regulus whispers "what happened after I died?" Fou pairs of eyes come to rest on him, all equally uncertain and guarded.

"Nothing of much importance." Andromeda finally tells him and Regulus feels his face burn red as tears sting at his eyes. Will everyone always lie to him? Do they think he's so young that he can't handle reality?

Voice a low rumble, he says "I know Bellatrix went to _Azkaban._"

The teenager recoils in her spot, face frosting white as she stammers "W-Who-"

"Sirius told me." He explains.

The three girls shoot his older brother furious glares and Sirius winces. "I forgot to hold my tongue, sue me." He grumbles and he drops his eyes submissively.

Feeling even more put-out, Regulus cries "I don't need you hiding things from me!" His cousins and brother appear undecided as they share glances. "I'm not a baby!" Regulus yells standing up from the couch. "I'm not _innocent!_" His family stares at him and Regulus fights not to flush under their stares, he knows he's not the _most _outspoken of his family, but surely they understand why he's doing this? They can't hide things from him, it will only inhibit them later.

Narcissa looks torn as she brings lacquer black nails to her soft red lips. "Oh Reggie, it's not that we don't _want _to tell you anything..." She ruminates, fading off in voice. Regulus twitches with tension, just _waiting _for the excuse his cousin could possibly come up with. Finally, she heaves a great sorrowful sigh and murmurs; "oh Regulus, you died so _early_."

Stiff and maybe more confounded than he was to begin with, the youngest boy cries "What's that supposed to mean? Surely I'm not the _only _one!"

Sirius shifts his gaze to him and for the first time Regulus can remember, his brother's eyes hold a form of regret. "Regulus, kid, a lot of people died in the first; I'll admit that...but not nearly as many as in the between the first and the second-"

"Even more in the second war;" Narcissa cuts in, then her face a corpse white she whispers "...and after."

"Things always get worse before they get better!" Andromeda bites at Narcissa.

"You call the killing of ex-Death-Eaters and those of undecided alliances a course for the better!?" Narcissa shouts indignant.

"Then what is?" Andromeda demands, two hands upon each rounding hip and chin lifted in an imperious tilt.

Eyes alight with a fury that Regulus had never seen in his cool cousin, she hisses "I know not, but, when did I ever have a chance to consider another?" Andromeda's face further frowns and even quieter, Narcissa utters with wobbling lips "When I was waiting for the _gallows_?"

Lost and a little more than afraid, Regulus turns to his brother and whispers. "Sirius?"

The older boy glances at him and gives him what he supposes is a reassuring smirk, but it falls short when his it struggles to stay in place. "'s alright kiddo," He mumbles; gripping Regulus's hand so hard it hurts.

Bellatrix's stare dart between her fuming sisters, confused, but not as confused as her cousins; she steps forward and puts a hand on either sisters' shoulders. "I don't know what you two are fighting about, but stop." She orders, at Narcissa's mutinous glower and Andromeda's open mouth she hurries on with "it's all in the past." Bella's face twists oddly at this and she mutters; "future. Whatever."

Regulus, who knows Bellatrix is trying very hard for them to all calm down to discuss the issue they're facing can't help himself but to ask. "Gallows?" He questions.

Narcissa turns her bothered gaze to him. "Yes." She croaks. "Myself and my husband just one of the more _prominent_ hung."

"What about you Bellatrix? Andromeda?" and then swirling around implores "Sirius?"

"None of it's pretty Reg" his brother replies.

"So? I need to know." He counters, "just like 'cissa said; I died _early_." The girl cringes and the others seem just as pained.

Sirius puts his hands up and exhales defeat. "Yeah, yeah your right." He agrees and then wagging a finger at his brother, tells Regulus "No details, I'm not giving you nightmares to _wet the bed_ over."

Regulus blushes a pure red and rebukes "I don't wet the bed!" His brother and cousins share vaguely amused looks and Regulus yells "I don't!"

"Of course you don't Reggie." Narcissa agrees, though, she's smiling as she ruffles his hair.

Huffing, he crosses his arms and demands. "Sirius won't you start?"

His brother winces and nods his head. "Might as well, I died next after all..."

* * *

By the time everything's been said, Regulus is so raw and vulnerable he isn't sure he can handle much else; less he falls into insanity (and isn't he like Bellatrix that way?). Just as the silence that's descended the five Blacks is to ruin them-Sirius-with belated host etiquette, rises from his seat with an offering. "Tea?" He implores. Readily, the groups answers in a chorus of agreement.

A while later after tea and following embraces and chaste kisses of the cheek, Sirius and Regulus watch the last of the sisters disappear into the swirling flames of the floo. The final smile Narcissa cast them echoes from the hearth and leaves the little study empty and colder than it'd been hours before. With abject thoughts swirling in his mind, Regulus doesn't tear his gaze from the dying flames of the fireplace as he gathers courage that isn't his. Lifting his head to stare at his brother's strangely subdue face, the younger boy whispers "This isn't over is it?" Sirius casts him a quizzical glance and Regulus finds himself pouting in frustration. "This _thing_, whatever it is." Understanding dawns on his brother's blank face and Regulus takes it as a signal to plow on. "This is only going to get harder, isn't it?" He comments, yet it still comes out uncertain.

Sirius casts him a bleak stare and reaches over, pulling the younger roughly against his side. Regulus tries to take comfort in it, but his brother's silence further's his anxiety. Just as he readies to part his lips to ask his question once more his brother clears his throat and nods his head. "Yeah, yeah it is." Relieved, but not, Regulus rest his head on his brother's shoulder. _Things always get worse before they get better..._His cousin's words echoing in his head, Regulus bites his lip in worry.

Somehow, he hopes Andromeda is wrong this time.

* * *

**The Blacks finally got together! And no one died! What does everyone think? Good? Bad? Okay chapter? Anyway, please review and thank you a ton for reading! Maybe you have suggestions on who the next chapter should be on?**


	13. Don't Wake me up, I am still Dreaming

**_Don't Wake me up, I am still Dreaming_**

**Edited as of 12/30/12.**

* * *

Augusta Longbottom glares at her mild pile of reports with frustration, she can't remember a single one of these cases, they had all been so similar and one right after another. When she had looked back on this period of time in her later years, she had come to see a pattern; a beginning to a tragedy no one had realized was sweeping across their little world. With an aggravated sigh, she runs a hand through her smooth hair and falls back in her seat to see her commanding officer striding towards their little section in the large office of Auroras. Blinking, Augusta curiously wonders what's got Don so excited. Waving a paper in the air he booms "Got an interesting reading of magic in a muggle neighborhood."

"So? Probably just some kid doin' accidental magic." A colleague from a desk or two behind her snorts and no matter how sharp she'd considered her memory, she can't name this person. _A recruit that met his end early, I bet, _Augusta muses.

Don's eyes darken a tad and he shakes his head, waving the paper about a little more. "No, no, accidental maybe, but...definitly not-_benign-_enough for it be a regular kid." He explains. Tapping her fingers, Augusta wishes Done would just get on with it and hand it off to someone to take care of; preferably, _not_ her. Don doesn't seem to notice any of their disinterest and brings the paper down to read. Squinting his eyes until wrinkles appear he tells them "A little house on the corner of Carpenter's Lane and Spinner's End, ya know, I think there's a registered magical home on that street."

Augusta perks up, Spinners End, huh? Hadn't that waspish potions teacher her grandson wrote home occasionally about when trying to explain his most recent failed grade in that class come from around there? Well, no matter, he'd been proclaimed a hero in the end...and how _scandalous _had that been? He'd certainly not _looked _the part of hero, but neither had her Neville... Pondering a bit more, she remembers Lily Potter came from the area too, such a sweet girl she'd been-is-she asserts, she remembers the lovely speech she gave at Frank and Alice's wedding as the Bride's maid.

With this in mind, the woman begrudgingly raises her hand and calls "I'll take it." Don eyes her a tad surprised, (though, she expected it, with the way she'd been moaning about reports this week).

"You sure Longbottom?" He inquires doubtfully.

Making a grabbing motion for the paper with the address she answers "Completely, now fork it over; I want to get it done by this evening."

* * *

Gazing at the small rustic red home with a wrap around front porch, Augusta is struck by the simplicity of muggle dwellings; how little they must be, she wonders if families are closer for it. Walking up to the house, she reaches a screened door and through it hears the quiet sound of what she assumes is a tell-a-vision. Raising a fist, she knocks once and before she can a second; a little girl with bright red hair is standing in the doorway with wide eyes.

Smiling, she asks "Is your mother home lovely?"

The girl gapes open mouth before shaking her head and murmuring "No, she's out getting medicine."

"Medicine?" Augusta mutters in confusion "At this of the year?" Though, she realizes the girl-Lily-she assumes knows she isn't speaking to her if the way she picks anxiously at her skirt is anything to go by.

"Who's sick?" She questions, searching her memories, she vaguely recalls someone mentioning Lily had a sibling..."You're sibling?"

The girl shakes her head, but quits it abruptly to nod. "Severus, mum and dad are working on making him my foster-brother." She explains.

"Severus..." Andromeda hums. "He's the one who's sick?" It would also make sense if he was the sick one, that magical burst no doubt put a strain on the boy's reserves. Kneeling down, she rests her cheek in her hand and inquires "Do you know why he's sick?"

The little girl's face pinches with pain as she nods her head. "Yeah." She mumbles.

Pressing a little more, Augusta asks "What happened?"

Lily's eyes water and her lip wobbles as she snivels "He used up his magic protecting me."

Augusta found herself thrown off a little, she thought Lily was muggleborn..."How do you know about magic?" She questions.

Lily wipes at her eyes and whimpers "Sev."

"Sev?" She repeats, uncertain.

"Severus told me about magic, his mum is-was-a witch." She recounts with a fresh wave of tears. Witch, huh? what are the chances that a magical household would be right down the street from a muggleborn witch? One in a million. Augusta would like to further explore this chance, but knows it's irrelevant.

Gauging the girl for her current state, she sees that this line of inquiries is upsetting the child and with that Augusta decides to wrap it up quick. "Do you know his mother's name?"

"Erm, I think he said something about Princes when talking about what the magical world..." Lily tells Augusta after a pause of thought.

"Prince?" Augusta says a bit surprised. "I remember them, their daughter was a year bellow mine; family almost didn't send her to Hogwarts. They thought it might corrupt her with ideas and keep her from being their perfect heir, always thought it was good she got away...but it seems she traded one hell for another..." Augusta rambles sighing sadly at the end. Lily stares up at her with a pale drawn face, tiny fingers clutching the screen door in a death grip. Realizing that the remark probably wasn't meant for little pitchers, Augusta puts on an apologetic face and murmurs "Sorry love," and then putting on a small smile, whispers "why don't you let take a look at Severus?"

Something akin to relief floods the redhead's face as she opens the door further; large green eyes surveying her nervously, she begs "You'll tell me if he's dying won't you?"

Augusta stops, the girl thinks he's _dying_? Good lord, what did the boy _do_? Feeling a touch more worried, Augusta gives the child a tilting promise of her head. "Of course, I'd need to tell _someone _where I've taken the boy if that's the case." She explains to the little girl.

Lily's tightly held shoulders slacken and she murmurs "'tuney's home too." Augusta raises an eyebrow, the child blushes and goes on to say "My _real _sister."

"Ah." Augusta acknowledges, falling silent as Lily takes her down the hall to a propped open door.

The child glances at her anxiously. "He's in here." She whispers pushing the door open to reveal a little girl's dream bedroom, but when Augusta's eyes find the bed the dream becomes a nightmare. A tiny boy-white as death-with mottled bruises dotting his small face is laid out on the bed, breathing quick and pained and beside him is an adolescent girl dabbing tiredly at his face with a piece of flannel.

The girl on the bed's face pulls into a look of disapproval as she sets the flannel back in the bowl beside her. "Lily-" She begins, voice shrill and angry.

"I'm Augusta Longbottom." She introduces, taking a step forward to shake the young woman's hand. The girl squints her eyes distrustfully, but takes the hand and gives it a firm shake.

"Charmed." She drawls.

"I'm going to take a look at Severus, okay?" Augusta implores, searching the girl for any negative reaction.

With a wave of her hand, Petunia is up from the bed and backing away. "Be my guest." She replies with a shrug. Easing down beside the little boy, Augusta feels her heart move to her throat. He's even smaller than her Frank is now, so fragile-no he's already broken-those bruises are aged and that cut above his brow is not doubt going to leave a faint scar someday. Checking the child over, Augusta is relieved to see that even though Severus used a good amount of magic in whatever incident from yesterday that he's only suffering from exhaustion and not from any serious depletion of his reserves.

Feeling almost tender about the little boy in front of her, Augusta reaches out to brush away a lock of midnight hair when Lily cries "Don't you'll w-"

It's too late, Augusta's hand has moved his curling strand of his hair and dark eyes have slitted open only to grow. Suddenly, Augusta is gasping and scrambling to shove the invading mind from her own; how is this possible? A _child _is a stronger legiliman than _her_? She feels him pull up memories she'd carefully buried in the back of her mind after she'd woken up in this world and with a final burst of power she manages to shove him out of her mind with a scream. Panting, she stares at the boy in front of her. "How" she huffs "can you do that?"

Dark eyes only gaze at her solemn. "Lily" he says.

The girl seems to understand without a word and she swirls around to face her sister. "Go get Sev a glass of water." She orders. The older girl appears ready to argue, but with a mulish grunt from her younger sister leaves the bedroom with a scoff. The second Petunia's out of the room, Lily swings the door shut and locks it.

"Lily!" Her sister yells from the other side, rattling the door once when she bangs a fist. "Don't think I'm not telling mother when she comes home!" The girl warns and with an irritated growl stomps down the hall and away from the room.

Turning back to them, Lily focuses an apologetic pout on her. "Sorry Mrs. Longbottom, can't let 'tuney hear us."

Augusta finds herself at a loss of what to say. "Yes, well," She stammers.

"Mrs. Longbottom" Severus starts, pushing himself up in the bed on weak arms; "Did you ever consider that you aren't the only one?" He inquires.

"What do you mean?" Augusta demands, one hand squeezing her wand as her heart thuds against her ribcage.

"To _remember._" Severus utters.

"You-You-" Augusta stutters, horribly confused and scared.

"It's alright Mrs. Longbottom, me an' Sev are like you." Lily soothes, coming forward to rest a small hand on her arm.

"Oh my" Augusta swoons, desperately trying to keep from falling over in a faint.

"You can't tell anyone else about us." Severus orders. "Lily's parents don't know, her sister doesn't know and neither does my father." He goes on to tell her.

"I hadn't-" Augusta stops suddenly, taking a large breath she whispers "I thought this was all some sort of dream," staring at the two children with awe she confides in them. "I thought I'd wake up at any moment with little Alice shaking me awake, 'grammy get up! Da's says breakfast's ready' but she hasn't...I've thought it a blessing to wake up everyday after I go to sleep to my husband's bare back and my son at my bedroom door demanding breakfast..."

Lily smiles at her in sympathy. "I know, I feel the same way."

Severus snorts. "I'm just waiting for this to become a nightmare." He declares and Lily swats at him.

"Don't say that!" She hisses, "not everything's meant for ruin!"

The boy only stares blankly back. "Forgive me for being a realist." He grumbles drily.

Lily rolls her eyes, before turning a pleading gaze on Augusta. "You won't take Severus away will you?"

"Why ever would I do that?" Augusta frowns.

The two share a sidelong stare. "Well..." Lily trails off. "He, um, _accidentally _killed his mum." She answers eventually.

"_What?!_" Augusta gapes, never had she considered the man capable of killing _family_!

"I thought she'd kill Lily!" Severus protest. "You don't know her! You didn't ssee her!" He shrills, eyes begging for forgiveness.

Augusta feels her heart shatter and then shatter again. There was a reason the boy was here and not with his father, it wouldn't be fair to punish the child for trying to protect the one person he could relate with in all the world. And as it is, there wouldn't be much point to bringing him back to the department for questioning, it would be ruled accidental; even though it obviously took a lot of _intent_ for his mother to be _dead_. The media frenzy it would cause as well...it would all be so _public_, it would oust them all before they're ready. "I won't." Augusta agrees; it's unfortunate the Prince girl's dead, but maybe she's found the hapiness she so furisouly searched for in life. Turning her face stern, she wags a finger at the boy and demands "but both of you will keep in contact with me, tell me if you learn anything about _this_" she says waving a hand at her body and then at them.

"You don't know anything then?" Lily cries dismayed.

"-if I hear about any trouble from this area, you'll becoming home with me Severus Snape!" Augusta finishes, ignoring Lily's outburst.

Severus roll his eyes and snarks "Whatever you have in mind is _nothing_ in comparison to _muggle _schooling." Lily giggles and Augusta can't help but crack a grin.

"Good." She quips, "then I expect not to have to come out this way again."

Severus crosses his arms and smirks. "Yes, you shan't." He agrees.

Standing up, Augusta bows at the pair and explains. "I must be going, I'll explain to my superiors it was just a bit of over the top accidental magic-and Severus, that reminds me, rest well for the next day or two, wouldn't do anyone any good if you ran yourself to death from exhaustion." Severus glares and Augusta chuckles.

"Goodbye Lily and Severus." She says, before disaparating.

In the stillness following Longbottom's exit, Severus turns to Lily. "We need to be more careful, next time it might not be ssomeone ssafe to find us." He remarks. Lily nods her head, because what else is she to do? Severus is right, this isn't a game; whatever's happened is affecting more than just them.

* * *

**Surprise chapter! I didn't even see this one sneaking up on me until I took a hard turn while finalizing Remus's chapter (accidentally forgot to save it, expect it possibly next Tuesday). So do you think Augusta Longbottom was worked in well? Do you think it seems out of place? How do you feel? Explain. Also do you think I should work in a few other adults? I feel like the kids need one or two adults like them to rely on, (any suggestions on that front?) After all, who's going to believe children? Adults? A trillion times more likely to get attention if they say something. Thank you for reading and please review!**


	14. Used to Dream Until I Stopped Writing

_**Used to Dream until I Stopped Writing Fiction**_

* * *

Remus knows he's going to _cry _if he doesn't figure out something soon. He's been trying to write a letter clever enough that no one but the Marauders would understand, but so far, for all his efforts only a basket full of crumpled parchment is what he has to present. With hitched breath, he scratches out his latest sentence before curling up in his desk chair; his tawny hair the only thing still visible from his doorway.

"Why?" He sniffles, "can't I think of a _single _thing?" Plates clatter from the kitchen downstairs and the sound of those blokes The Flies or some other bug whispers up the stairs and for the hundredth time since he began this project three days ago; Remus realizes he's relieved to know his mother and father think he's just writing a story because he wants to be a _writer _when he grows up. It's a perfect cover, really.

So, ever so slowly slipping from his seat he walks over to his bedroom door, being mindful of the squeaky floor board four paces from the door and making sure he doesn't stumble over the board to the left of the squeaky board that's corner refuses to be nailed down no matter how many times dad fixes it and then with the speed of creeping sunlight pushes his bedroom door close and locks it with the key he keeps in his pocket. He needs the barrier, Remus can't go like this with his parents hovering just outside his room. Too many things have come and passed these last days and sometimes (okay, always) he thinks if he moves too quick; doesn't stare long enough, responds too slow, everything will disappear and he'll be back in blood-pounding battle, dodging spells meant to maim and kill and in the instant he returns, a spell will strike him and Remus will be right back where he started.

Backing away from his door, Remus's breath hitches and he runs at his bed falling into his lumpy pillow; choked wails and struggling tears coming from him faster and faster. He doesn't know how long he's cried, he just know it feels like it's only been moments and a decade at the same time (he wonders if he'll ever fit his body ever again). Sniffling into the crook of his arm, Remus lets his mind wander. He thinks of his not yet born wife, how much he wishes she was here with him right now, how much he wants her to be alive, how much he would have prefered to be dead than without her, he thinks of the infant son he left behind, the guilt that eats him alive and tells him the poor boy will end up like Harry or like any other numerous orphan throughout history, he thinks of brave James who died for his son and wonders if he's finally matched his friend in bravery (and foolishness), he thinks of Sirius and how quick he was to act and how slow he himself was, he thinks of Peter who turned traitor and wonders if he had been a better, more caring, more considerate friend if Peter would have ever taken such a dark and twisted path and against all of his intentions, he thinks of imposing man of the dungeons; and can't help but ponder if in those dark days he and Severus were equal in their regrets.

Maybe...Remus should write him too? He knows they were never friends, but if James or Sirius or _Peter _are here, why wouldn't Severus be? More like why _would _he...Scraping his hand through his thin hair, Remus grumbles "This is making my head hurt" and it is, there are far too many possibilities, angles, views, for him to ever guess who's a likely candidate and who isn't. Flopping restlessly to his back, Remus decides he needs to keep these letters to a minimum; no need to bring more unwanted attention than necessary. Tapping his fingers in an erratic staccato, the werewolf filters through boyhood memories and fancies; trying to find a single _word _he could mention that would let those he writes he remembers too, if they remember. Fully absorbed in this process, Remus nearly misses the soft knock at his door.

Rolling off his bed, Remus ruffles up his hair and squints his eyes; hoping who's ever on the other side of the door will believe he had been napping. Unlocking the door, he pushes it open and peers up to see his mother with a full plate and glass of milk in hand. "Hungry love?" She implores, voice soft and tender. Remus basks in it;

"Yeah."

She gives him the plate and cup and leans over kissing him on both cheeks before rising up a dreamy emotion on her face. "You know," she starts; "I wanted to be a journalist when I was your age."

Remus perks up a bit for her and asks like he can't believe it "really?"

She grins at a distant memory and nods her head. "Oh yes, I spent days and days writing about fake floods, bank robberies and breathtaking stories of children rescued from fires and kidnappers..."

Remus chuckles. "But that doesn't really happen!" He exclaims, waiting for her reaction as she laughs along with him.

"I know, it was all just school girl fancies..."she answers, "I was getting a degree in English literature when I met your father at a pub just mid way through university and well, we married a year later and just as I was wrapping up college I found out I was having you!" She finishes the tale smiling at him.

"That's when dad told you about magic!" Remus adds in happy to know this part of his parent's and his own story.

"Yes and it tickled me pink to think I could have my very own little wizard or witch." She gushes.

Remus grins around a sip of milk, swallowing quick he chirps; "I'm happy I'm your wizard mum!"

Samantha's reaches forward and brushes a shaking hand through his hair. "I'm happy your my little wizard too." She whispers.

Remus smiles once more and gulps down the rest of his milk, as he finishes it he comes to a conclusion. "You'll be in my story mum." He promises her.

"You don't need to do that-" She starts.

"I want you in it." Remus buts in, gazing seriously at his mother.

Tears well in her eyes and she whispers "Thank you Remus." The child stares at her and then at his dishes; setting them on the floor with a quiet clack, he steps over them and wraps his skinny arms around her.

"You deserve it mum, you deserve a lot more too." He murmurs into her middle. Her long fingers tangle in his brown hair and she kisses him on the head.

"My little wizard" she whispers, arms enclosing them as they sway left to right. "You are so very kind, but I think you'll be best off writing about that clever map of the boys; the adventures they have..."She tells him. Remus stills. The map. The _Marauders map_! It's perfect! A treasure known and invented by only them, no one but a Marauder with their memories in tact would know what he speaks of if he were to use it as code. But what part of it to use as code..."Remus?" His mother implores, pulling away to frown at him.

"I'm fine mum." He assures, "it's just that it's perfect." He elaborates for her when the skin between her brow nits.

"What's perfect? The map?" She questions, seemingly more puzzled than before.

"Yeah!" Remus exclaims. "It's the perfect place to start!" He laughs.

His mother's eyes cloud, yet she nods her head in encouragement. "Yes, I suppose you're right." The woman agrees.

Remus giggles and says "you'll see mum."

Her lips twist into a smile and she quickly brings a hand to smother it. "I guess I will, won't I?" She accepts, amused.

Remus pouts. "You don't believe me." He accuses, petulant.

"Oh no" mother disagrees airily; "I believe you" she says, "you are a clever boy after all."

Remus feels his chest pang. "No, not really" he sighs with a shake of his head, "but I know cleverness when I see it."

Mother thins her lips and leans against the doorway. "Sometimes," she starts, "I feel like your so very grown up." She tells him, but then her eyes shift and she goes on to say "then other times I feel like you are far too innocent."

Remus shrugs at her, what can he say? "Everyone's that way" he states. "You know and experienced certain stuff in one area, but never in another."

"There you go again;" mother mutters, "being too old."

Remus opens his hands to her helpless. "What do you want from me mother?"

She's quiet for a long while; Remus itches to move, to babble, to do _something, _but he can't. Finally, her aged eyes settle on him and she says in a breath "To be you." Face slowly growing more urgent as the lighting-fast thoughts pass through her mind, she grabs one of his beseeching hands and lays an opened mouth kiss on it. "Don't be anyone but _you_." She begs, tears spilling like lava-hot and burning-on his bare skin.

"I haven't been anyone but me, I might have not let him act, but I never pretended otherwise." Remus mumbles and mother looks so very understanding as she stares at him and wipes the tears away.

"I know," she soothes; "yet, sometime, maybe years and _years _from today...you'll be convinced that if you are someone else, maybe better, maybe worse, those you care for or respect will like you _more._" Mother tells him in hushed tone, passing wisdom from mother to son.

"Okay." Remus utters not accepting or denying, just _understanding_.

Mother backs away, in a blink she's a willow in the doorway, yielding, yet still unbroken. "Good" She replies and then slowly turns away, walking back down the creaky stairs and back to her duties as mother and wife of the Lupin home.

Remus stays there, unmoving; he uses the quiet to absorb everything and take a lung-filling breath. Finally calm, he moves to close his door to all but a crack and picks up his empty cup and plate of lunch. Taking it to his desk he sets the dishes aside and carefully picks up a piece of a new piece of parchment to lay in the center of his desk. Gazing at the blankness, Remus plucks his quill from its spot in the inkwell and deliberately plots;

_I solemnly swear..._

* * *

**Things are starting to happen now, what do you think? I got it out early, (needed something to take my mind off serious stuff that's happening). Anyway, I hope you like the chapter and _please review_ and thanks to those who reviewed last chapter; Flame55, Neesie-Pie, KodeV, Professor Radar, Loves to Read Books and Blackphoenix23. Thanks to all of you for reading this far and I hope you'll continue you to read in the future!**

***P.S. Does anyone one have suggestions for a Proffessor (or two) who should have memories?***

**-Credit to KodeV for Remus's message tp the other Marauders about the map.**


	15. I'm the Hero of This Story

**_I'm the Hero of This Story_**

** Edited 1/12/13**

* * *

He stands mouth dry and hands curled in damp fists while his young wife turns her head back casting him one last sorrowful smile as she steps into the devouring flames, Luciu's eyes dilate and his heart bangs against his chest like a beast kept from its family; he shoves one of his fists into his mouth successfully choking him from pleading her to stay. It would not do, not for a Malfoy to stoop so low as to _beg _(but, was that true any longer? Hadn't it been his downfall to agree with such teachings in the end? Not to show remorse, not to show mercy, not to give away what could turn into a weakness?)

"No!" He gasps, arms jerking out trying to grasp for his one weakness, before she could be turned and used against him. Yet, it was too late, only wisping flames dying away just like his hope are left in this dark, unforgiving mansion. The blond wheezes puffs of panicked breath, trying and failing to control his emotions as the rage inside him; he _needs _her, _he needs her_!

But, he can't have her.

Bitters tears well in his eyes and Lucius decides then to find his father's Fire Whiskey to take the ache from his rawness. Stumbling from his boyhood room, he finds himself in his (father's) study and pulling his wand from his robe pocket, points it at the cabinet he knows father kept his stash in. The dark doors clatter open and without thought for their state, Lucius feels the top shelf until his fingers brush a cool glass; with scrabbling fingers, he manages to grab hold of it well enough to pull it from the cupboard and nearly drop it on his toes in his haste to have it. Popping the top, Lucius downs the liquid relishing the burn and ignoring the steady dribble that falls from the corner of his lips and the trails of tears that scorch his cheeks. Suddenly, he yanks the bottle away heaving and gasping for breath; warmed and mellowed, Lucius stares at the half empty bottle with a smile. If he drinks a bit more, maybe, Lucius will be able to sleep without fear of terrors that surely will visit him in his dreams. Bringing the glass back to his lips, Lucius gulps down more the whiskey.

In no time at all, Lucius feels the darkness ebb at his conciousness and drag him into drunken slumber.

* * *

Mid morning, sunlight shining painfully on his eyelids; Lucius rolls over with a groan and one hand coming to rub at his forehead. Urgh. Need Pepper Up. Struggling to his feet, Lucius wanders to the desk and feels about the drawers for any bottles that may contain the potion he wants, when he's incapable of finding a Pepper Up he collapses to the floor once more with a whine. Where can he get a Pepper Up? And for that matter, who will sell it to a boy of his age (who's so clearly hung over)?

Severus.

The names pops into mind without Lucius's usual censor in place. His head reels at the thought, Severus Snape, how'd he been awed by the man and the boy, how betrayed he'd felt by his actions in the first war and how quickly he'd been willing to trace them in the second if it meant his boy would be saved. It had taken him a decade at least, but Lucius could safely say the two were friends in the end.

Lucius pulls himself to his feet with the help of the desk and he makes to Floo to Spinner's End, when his clouded mind manages to produce doubt. What if the child doesn't remember as he does? Lucius stands for a while trying to come up for a reason why he _wouldn't _when the blond decides he doesn't care one way or another. If he does, then he'll brew him his Pepper Up; if he doesn't, Lucius bet's he'll still probably be able to brew him the Pepper Up (that genius bastard). So, it's a win win either way. Though, now that he considers it, Lucius thinks it'd be better to apparate to Spinners End; the shack probably isn't even connected to any Floo network. Without thought for his condition or age, the blond boy disappears from his home with a crack.

He lands on a browned lawn beside a sinking porch, Lucius blinks his eyes rapidly trying to adjust to the light and lessen the shock of pain the brightness causes. When he feels well enough to move without falling over, the blond makes his way up the creaky steps and knocks heavily on the door.

Moments later a tall, dark-haired man with red eyes answers the door. "'s Severus here?" Lucius inquires.

The ugly face twists and suddenly he's hollering curses and insults at the Malfoy Heir, backing up a step, Lucius takes that as a no. Well, where would the bastard be then? Lucius ponders. Walking away and ignoring the stares that were beginning to come from opened doorways and windows all around the block Lucius walks down the block to stop abruptly at the corner of Baker's and Spinner's. That mudblood's house! He'll be there, Lucius has no doubts.

Scurrying to the house he remembers Severus once pointing out to him when he came to visit, he runs up the white steps to knock on the screen door when a dark-haired boy and redheaded girl appear from around the corner of the house.

"What are you doing here?" The little boy demands.

Lucius smirks at him, but any superiority it would have had fades when he stumbles down the steps. "Need a Pepper Up" Lucius grunts.

The girl frowns at him and Severus rolls his eyes. "You'll need more than a Pepper up," he remarks; then nostrils flaring he inquires "just how much did you _drink_?"

"All of it." Lucius answers, swaying as he struggles to stand tall and intimidate the younger children.

Severus raises an eyebrow and comments "you aren't dead."

"Malfoy's don't do alcohol poisoning." Lucius sneers and the younger snorts his amusement.

"Why don't you come inside? People are beginning to stare." Lily offers, reaching out to latch onto Lucius's sleeve.

"Whatever." He murmurs allowing the two children to drag him inside.

"Who's _that_?" A brunette aks, face one of disgust.

"My friend." Severus pipes up, dumping Lucius into a kitchen chair.

"What's he doing here?" The girl huffs.

"He's _ssick_" Severus snaps, then with a condescending tone adds "_obviously_" under his breath.

Crossing her arms the girl glares. "He better be gone by the time mum gets home," she warns. "Mum and daddy don't have the money to take in another kid, you know." She tells him and Lucius watches almost mystified as his friend flinches and hunches his shoulders.

"Cut it out Tuney!" The girl shouts at her sister, "that's not fair and you know it!"

The girl holds up her head and walks out of the room with one last jab. "You freaks better not make a mess."

"I hate her sometimes!" Lily hisses, an angry stare focused on the doorway.

Severus ignores her as he begins to poke and prod Lucius. "Quit that." Lucius hisses, pulling away as the younger pulls at his robe sleeves trying to peer at his arm.

"I just want to-"

"I know exactly what you want," Lucius counters viciously; "I'm just as pure as you now!" He spits causing the dark head to recoil.

"Don't talk to Sev like that!" The redhead yells at him.

Lucius curls his lips into a snarl, what do these _children _have on him? They're just filthy mudbloods, he's as pure as they get. "I'll talk to him _and _you however I please!" He rebukes.

Severus's eyes flash, his hand searches out Lily's and in a moment of defiance declares "if you don't behave you can ssay goodbye to any help from _me_."

Lucius grins with a flair of superiority and counters; "say goodbye to my good word if you refuse to listen to me."

Severus frowns, looking less rebellious by the second. "We don't need you! Mrs. Longbottom promised to help us!" Lily counters, squeezing her friend's hand.

Lucius finds himself stunned. "How-" He chokes himself off abruptly and nervously murmurs "she remembers too, huh?" The pair stare on in confusion as Lucius further pales. "How are we supposed to keep track of this? What if someone dangerous remembers?" He whispers on the verge of panicking.

Severus reaches over and pats his knee. "We can't," he tells him and Lucius wants to argue; shout at the younger boy, there must be _some _way no matter how small to keep track of who and who doesn't remember. Then, Severus concludes "we just stay out of the spot light, try and behave as typical as possible."

Lucius sneers. "Easy for you to say, hiding out here in the _muggle_ world!" He spits and Severus shakes his head with a sigh.

"Usually he's not _this _pig-headed." The younger boy mutters to his friend.

"Then why _is _he _now_?" Lily grumbles.

Severus pauses, mind working rapidly to seek out an answer and Lucius can only wait in miserable silence; knowing it's only a matter of moments before-

"His father died the other day." Severus states.

"Bravo!" Lucius drawls with a sarcastic clap.

The girl looks close to tears and Severus actually has to restrain her from leaping on him, Lucius appreciates this. "I'm _so _sorry!" Lily sniffs. Lucius grunts and looks away (he can't see her tears, he'll start crying too).

"Lily" Severus says, grabbing the girl's attention.

Her fiery hair flows as she turns to look her friend in the eye. "What?" She demands.

"Not now," Severus says to her, "why don't you get Lucius ssomething to eat and drink?" He suggests in a soothing inflection. "I doubt he's eaten or had anything since-"

"I get it." Lily buts in, "you want to talk. _Alone._" She fumes and with a final stamp of her foot disappears from the room, leaving Severus and Lucius alone.

"She didn't have to leave." Lucius tells his friend, "I don't want to strain your friendship." He doesn't care to add again, but he knows it's implied if the way Severus glances away is anything to read into.

Severus rolls his eyes and flops down on the sofa beside him. "Lily's a bleeding heart, I've always know that; letting her sstay would only hinder what we need to discuss." He explains with a sigh.

Observing the boy, Lucius notices fading bruises and scabs on his face; the lisp is new too. "Who'd you get into a tussle with?" He inquires and unbidden sweat beads on his neck in fearful anticapation of the answer.

"A belt." Severus replies with disgusted curl of his lips.

"Ah." Lucius murmurs softly, he itches to know the right words; alas, of all the hardships he's faced, an abusive guardian is not one of them.

"Indeed" Severus mutters lips thin and eyes focused hatefully on the ground.

"I was hung." Lucius supplies in a way of barter and apology.

Severus (finally) looks at him again, shadow eyes astonished. "Truly? Just like that?" He presses.

"No, I fought for my son's life first." The older boy answers. "They wanted him too-" He cuts himself off, holding back tears at the thought of the back of the regal blond he glimpsed in his final seconds. "I stopped them in the end; I couldn't save myself, but that didn't matter any more." He concludes, eyes rising up to search Severus for his response.

Severus in a rare display of physical support places his pale hand on Lucius's wrist. "You won," he whispers fiercely "you did what you set out to do;" Lucius waits in hushed silence for Severus to impart him with a knowledge he did not remember giving. "You saved your son." Severus concludes staring at Lucius with eyes of alight coal.

Lucius doesn't speak. He can't. He won. He saved his son. That's all he ever wanted, he wanted Draco safe. Suddenly he's breathing again, dry gasping sobs fall from him unwanted and he attempts to stop the tears spilling from him with the heal of his hands. "I won," Lucius hiccups; "_I won._"

Yet, he can't help but still feel like he's the one who lost.

* * *

**Not my favorite chapter, but I think it seems like a reasonable reason as to how Lily and Severus would reconnect with the magic world in a more permanent way (Augusta doesn't have the time to visit them a lot and I doubt Lily's parents would be comfortable with it). Does Lucius seem too out of character? I hope you'll let me know, but I feel like his father just dieing, being separated from his wife and the stressors that lead to his death would make him vulnerable. Eh, I'll come back and do some readjusting and editing later; this chapter's coming out a lot later than I thought it would as it is.**

**Before I become set on having a Professor or two in the story, anyone against having any more adults (or maybe just professors?)**

**Anyway, please review and thanks for reading! **

***PS should I do James next or find a way to introduce the professors I chose?***

**Special thanks to Onaleia for helping in working out a kink in this chapter.**


	16. We will not let Time Erase us

_**We will not let Time Erase us**_

* * *

James drops to his bed with a bone-deep sigh, curling into a loose ball. After he's sunk into his sheets, his mind plays out the brief conversation between him and his mother from earlier that day;

_"So secretive these days...maybe you'll be a Slytherin yet, like your uncle."_

_"No. No, I'm too easily read, like dad."_

_"Yes...I suppose you're right."_

James presses the heels of his hands into his eyes, trying to block out his mother's wistfully disappointed face; he _knows _she loved her brother (slimy Slytheriness and all), but James sometimes (always) wishes she could be more like dad and not seek out similarities between him and her dead brother. James has been trying, trying to behave as boisterous and wildly as he always had...but no matter how hard he tries, he only half-suceeds. James is not an actor, he's too open for that; though he's done well enough to shake off the majority of his parents' worries and suspicions.

James lets out a woosh of breath and slackens his body in an attempt to force himself to rest when a tap-tap-tapitty-tap echoes off the thick panes of his bedroom window. disgruntled, he shoves himself from his bed, a hand running through his perpetually messy as he stalks over to open the window. Unlatching it, the simple barn owl hops as the window comes out before roosting once more upon the sill. James eyes the bird wearily, it doesn't _look _dangerous, but why would anyone one be mailing _him_? He nine. Well, in body anyway, "Who do you belong to, huh?" James inquires reaching out to run a bitty finger down one of its wings. The bird ruffles and hoots around the letter, nearly dropping it; "hey!" Jame yelps, snatching up the parchment before it can fall. The bird gives James an infuriatingly pleased look and with a quick secession of hoots is off and away in the wind, leaving James alone with the cheap paper resting in his hand. Scowling, James grumbles "Bloody owls"; James never did care for the creatures sense of humor.

With a sigh, he turns his attention to the letter; frowning he decides at least it isn't _fancy_, that would only mean trouble. Turning it over in his hands, it slowly seeps into James that this letter, it could only be from-_Moony_-his heart _soars. _Elated, James rips into the letter and reads the single line written within;

_I solemnly swear..._

James belly bubbles up with laughter, he tumbles to the carpeted floor and his arms wrap around his middle instinctively; _Moony, _always the cleverest of them. Eventually, the laughter ebbs away to the sporadic chuckle and he rises up wiping the tears wetting his cheeks. "_Thank you_" he breathes to the world, hoping whatever embodies it will hear him and pay acknowledgement. Bringing himself up on coltish legs, James stumbles to his desk and without hesitation scribbles;

_I'm up to no good_.

Setting his quill aside, he lifts the sheet up and admires it in the wan light. Careful neat letters followed by his own, messy and hasty; it's been far too long since he and Remus last exchanged letters, not since he and the family-

No, he wasn't going to think about that. He couldn't, he just _couldn't_! Swallowed up in a torrent of childish feelings; he snivels and trembles, fighting the horror story images that plague his mind. Squeezing his eyes closed, he slams his hands over his ears trying to block out the recollections as he screams "Nooo!"

A few minutes later, the future fades; leaving James sweaty and ill as he tries to grasp that he is _safe-_well, relatively speaking anyway, no where was ever _entirely _safe-exhaling, he falls back into his seat. He doesn't do anything for a few minutes, waiting for time to tick on; remind him that he isn't _dead. _When secure in his reality, his thoughts naturally carry back to the answered letter waiting on his desk for mailing. Picking it up, James creases it closed a second time and returns to his window. Then sticking his fingers in his mouth, he whistles out the still open window; within a matter of seconds a family owl is resting in front of him awaiting James's orders. Smiling, James pets the critter's head as he hands it the letter; "take that to Remus Lupin, got it?" He croons at the animal and with a trill she's off in a flurry of feathers.

Settling back, the boy anxiously paces the room waiting for a reply. Possibly an hour later (maybe longer), his owl returns; a letter caressed in her beak. Jumping up from his bed in a jumble of limbs, James nearly spooks the owl as he snags the letter from her mouth.

"Thanks Biddy." He coos at the owl before side-stepping to his desk to grab up a biscuit and give it to the bird who nips the tips of his fingers as she eats up the morsel. James winces, but doesn't retract his fingers as she pecks the crumbs from his palm and flies off into the fading day light. James holds the letter in his hands for a while, torn between anxious feelings and excitement; licking his lips, he slips a finger under a corner and centimeter by centimeter, the boy pushes it up. He sees as he further unfurls the parchment that's it filled from top to bottom, corner to corner with crammed-yet measured words-His eyes rove the near incomprehensible blob; nevertheless, he finds a beginning.

_James, you don't know how happy I am; well, maybe you do? You ARE like me after all, I've missed you Prongs; so did Sirius...hopefully I'll hear back from him soon and then I can tell him about you too. How are you? Do you have any idea what's going on or are you just as confounded as me? Have you tried to get in contact with anyone else, I'm sure if Lily recalls the past (or is it the future?) she must be waiting on you mate. I'm sorry, I must sound like a lunatic so far; it's just been so LONG mate, you've missed so much, so many things...I'll just give you the highlights for now; first off, Harry lived and "defeated" the Dark Lord, but he came back later, Sirius went to Azkaban because everyone was under the impression HE was the one who turned traitor and killed those muggles...I bet you know who the real traitor is though, don't you? Nevermind; highlights, highlights...Harry's Gryfindor, he's praised as the savior of the wizarding world (though, he's very humble; more like Lily that way, wouldn't you say?) After he came to Hogwarts, he made friends with a Weasley and a muggle born witch, they're a tight little trio; maybe not as mischievous as us, but they have a penchant for trouble none the less. Towards the end of my own life, Sirius died in confrontation at the Ministry; (fell into the veil, if your curious) I myself married and had my own son, Theodore Remus Lupin, quite the experience having a child is, isn't it? I never thought I could love and fight in the name of just a single soul...but I did, I fought in the light's last stand; on the grounds of Hogwarts and I...I died, I died so my son might have a better world..._

_I always did wonder, James, what did you die for?_

_Please write back soon, I would like to set up a time to meet with you if it's possible;_

_Remus J. Lupin_

James quakes, he falls to the floor and desperately tries to stop the trembling of his hands fearing the sheet will rip. He _lived, _his _son,_ _he lived; _A woosh of air slips from his parted mouth. Maybe, just possibly, everything hasn't been for naught; little Harry lived, he lived and thrived; hailed the hero James always dreamed he'd be one day.

_"He's special, just look into those eyes Lils" _James had told his wife the day after Harry was born in a moment of peace.

_"They're the same as mine, Love" _She'd answered with a happy quirk of her lips.

_"Well, I knew you were special when I met you too! It's those emerald eyes I tell you!" _James had argued back in a bout of silliness.

"_You silly man_." Lily had teased leaning up from her spot in search of a kiss and James had been happy to oblige...

"Lily" He murmurs. He needs to write her. He needs to _know_, he can't stand another second of not knowing if she remembers their life and their child like he does or if she's...James can't bring himself to think the thought.

Groping for his desk chair, he tugs himself up on wobbling legs and takes up two fresh sheets of parchment from his desk drawer before crawling into his chair. Biting his nails, he stares at the will be letters and struggles to choose who to write to first; Lily or Remus...

_Lily,_

But, wait, he can't. She's in the _muggle _world, he doesn't even know her childhood home's address...it pains James to know he never cared to learn his wife's nuances or her finer history, but James know once he finds her it will never be the case again; James will treasure every bit of her, from her most mundane habits to the way her hair trails behind like a flag of fire...Swallowing back the sobs, he crumples up what would be Lily's letter and tosses the rubbish behind him and drags the blank parchment in front of him. He pauses for all of a moment, before he begins to write;

_Remus, _

_I've missed you too Moony..._

* * *

**So how's it going guys? Things are starting to fall into place, it's only a matter of a few chapters before everyone comes together in one grand meeting! That only makes logical sense right? It's obvious they'll have to all come together at _some _point. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter, it's a bit short, but final's are just around the corner and I have the feeling those will be pretty time consuming this year...**

**Thanks for reading, comments, criticism, suggestions and ideas are all welcome and appreciated; please review!**


	17. Put your Hand in my Hand

_**Put Your Hand in my Hand**_

* * *

Walking into what _had _been her warm and quiet home, Julie nearly drops her groceries at the scream that vibrates through the house "I _HATE _YOU _SEVERUS SNAPE_!" Falling back against the door in shock, she catches a glimpse of a blond boy in her kitchen through the doorway; he seems to notice her too, if the embarrassed reddening of his ears is anything to go by. She doesn't recognize the child, but he seems to be around Petunia's age; possibly one of her friends?

"Lily!" Severus cries and a door up stairs slams.

Mrs. Evans sighs, she had hoped having a boy in the house wouldn't increase the drama; she hoped wrong. Ignoring the fight for the time being, she walks into the kitchen to find that the boy is wearing an odd robe with a hood over a pair of silk green pajamas. She props an eyebrow up in question and the boy fidgets. Putting the groceries on the counter, she comes to crouch in front of the child's chair and putting on the biggest smile she can muster she asks softly "Who might you be, love?" The boy's mouth opens, he closes it with a click and flushes even redder than before. Julie laughs not unkindly and introduces herself instead. "Hullo, I'm Petunia's mother, you can call me Julie."

The boy seems to regain his speech (and manners) because he thrust his hand out to her and answers back "Lucius Malfoy." Taking up the offered hand, the woman nods as she shakes it.

"So, what brings you here?" She inquires, when feet slap against the floor's linoleum. Turning around, Mrs. Evans sees Severus in the doorway his young face scrunched in held back hurts.

His dark eyes are on Lucius when he speaks. "She _hates _me!" The again doesn't need to be said, Lucius still feels painfully responsible. Yet, it isn't Lucius who has to do the comforting because without another word from Severus, Lily's mother is at the younger boy's side, wrapping her arms around him as she shooshes him with a hand combing through his (clean) hair.

"Oh love, she's just a bit upset. Pet says the same to Lily sometimes, but she doesn't actually _hate _her." Julie soothes as the boy stands silently in her grip. Severus begins to twist and turn so she let's him go to see tears have spilled down his cheeks.

"That's a lie! Petunia _does _hate Lily because she's a-" He stops, lips pressed in a thin line. Mrs. Evan's chortles nervously; Pet doesn't hate Lily, does she?

Seeing that this could very quickly go down a dangerous path, Lucius pipes up "Mrs. Evans, I'm here on behalf of my father-Severus's Godfather-he wishes for him to come stay with us."

Lily's mother glances at the boy, she doesn't know what kind of father just lets their child walk out of the house in a robe and pajamas or why Severus hasn't mentioned them before, but she doesn't think a bit of a fib can hurt. "Well, he'll have to go to court; we've adopted Severus."

Lucius's face falls. "Oh," then with pleading eyes, he implores "could he come for a visit some weekends?" At the woman's uncertain nibbling of her thumb, Lucius quickly adds "Father's usually off on business, he could come over on the weekends he's not there?"

"Who watches you when your father's not home?" Mrs. Evan's asks a bit alarmed.

Lucius shrugs. "The maid, she's there most of the time." She gives him the most pitying stare Lucius has ever seen and he has to hold back the growls and insults that want to spew from his lips.

"Love, you can come over and see him anytime you like." She tells him and Lucius forces his shoulders to slump in relief and put on the winning smile he often used as a boy.

"Thank you Mrs. Evans." He replies.

"Julie, love." She corrects with a smile.

Lucius just nods, before hopping up from his chair and brushing dirt from his clothes. "I best be going, I didn't think to change after I got the letter from the authorities this morning." He explains, faking an embarrassed smile.

Severus's adoptive mother accepts the lie for truth and nods her head as if it all makes sense now. "Do you need a lift?"

"No thank you," Lucius declines "I called someone just before you got here, I told them to wait around the corner." He says to her.

She smiles. "Alright, remember to come by anytime." Julie agrees.

"I'll show you out." Severus offers, snagging his friend's sleeve as they walk towards the front door. When they are outside, he pushes it closed with his shoulder and glares at Lucius. "What were you thinking? Making stuff up like that."

The older boy just shrugs. "I assumed whatever I made up would be accepted easily enough once I gauged a bit more information from her."

Severus scowls furiously at him. "Don't." He orders, "she's good, her husband's good, they're going to let me stay here." He informs Lucius in his snappy sort of way.

"I saw." Lucius agrees with a bit of a smirk, but as quickly as it came it falls as he apologizes "I didn't mean for her get upset with you."

Severus waves a tired hand. "When I told her to leave the room, I expected her to get upset; just not.."

"That upset?" Lucius supplies.

Severus sighs and nods. "Yeah, not that upset." Then, biting his lip, he glances at Lucius from the corner of his eye as he faces the road pretending to gaze at the sky. "If things...if things don't work out here," he whispers, "can I come stay with you?" He implores.

Lucius claps a hand on the younger boy's shoulder and ignores the way he flinches. "Yes, of course," he cements readily, "but..." at this, Severus's hair droops into his face hiding his eyes; holding back a smile Lucius whispers "I don't think you'll need to."

Severus's lips flicker upwards and Lucius let's his own tilt up as well. "Thanks." He says and Lucius accepts this with a lift of his chin.

"I'll stop by sometime next week," he offers and Severus bobs his head once and Lucius continues with "I might bring Narcissa with."

Severus's eyes widen "Then does she?"

"Yeah, her older sisters too" Lucius replies and then after a moment of doubt, he adds in "Regulus and his brother as well..."

Severus scowls. "Of course the mutt-!"

Lucius exhales, he understands Severus's sentiment, but doesn't agree. "Andromeda's happy to have him" the older boy tells him.

"She would" Severus grumbles.

"What if I brought him by? What if Lily wanted to see him?" Lucius inquires.

Severus's face twists into something mournful and he sneers "She's still pining for that _prick_."

Lucius shakes his head and warns "Don't let her catch you saying that, it'll only make her more upset."

The dark-haired boy's shoulders quiver. "I know."

Squeamish of the direction of their conversation, Lucius decides to wrap things up. Bending down, to put him and the younger child on equal terms; Lucius whispers "If you need anything..."

"I know." Severus says shifting his glance away. "Next week?" He questions uncertainly.

"Yeah, next week." Lucius reiterates, he reaches out and gently takes a dark strand between his fingers "I don't think you've ever had your hair this clean."

Severus frowns and blushes. "Well, didn't have much shampoo at home and...potion fumes aren't know for keeping hair shiny."

Lucius grins mischievously and prompts "Maybe you could come up with a potion to keep hair safe from constant potion smoke." Severus's eyes flash and he bares his teeth, but Lucius is able to spy the happy curve of his eyebrows and so just laughs when Severus threatens to make potion that makes hair permanently greasy. Standing up straight, Lucius comments "Next time I'll have to bring a portkey, it's not such a good idea to be aparating so much."

"By Lucius." Severus says and the blond casts him one quick grin before disappearing from sight.

Severus stays on the porch for a long while before sighing. "I can't stay out here forever" he murmurs to himself.

"No, you can't." Twirling around, he finds himself surprised to see Lily standing there with tear-stained cheeks.

"Lily!" He exclaims, half delighted, half wary.

"I shouldn't have gotten so mad." She mutters.

Severus shakes his head and disagrees. "You had every right, I behaved like you didn't deserve knowing what was going on."

Lily frowns at her friend. "Stop taking so much blame Sev."

He cocks his head to the side and asks "Who's fault is it then?"

Lily absent-mindedly twirls a strand of fire-red hair on her finger and muses "just how many people started blaming you for stuff after I died? Before even..." Severus gapes open mouthed and helpless in giving a fair estimate. "Too many, I see" Lily sighs at her friend's speechlessness.

Stepping forward, she wraps the skinny boy in her arms and whispers "it's going to stop now, any blame that comes your way it's not yours unless they can give solid proof."

Severus is still against her when his voice-muffled by her shoulder-inquires "What if _I _have proof it's my fault."

"Then you'll talk to me," she answers firmly "because you obviously don't know what does and doesn't fall under you jurisdiction."

One of his hands comes to curl around a thicket of her hair as he asks "who's at fault this time?"

Lily laughs breathless into his neck. "One track mind," she remarks amused; "this time, I think it's both of us."

Severus pulls away and with searching eyes demands "How?"

"Well..." Lily drawls, "I overreacted and you didn't trust me.

"Of course I trusted you!" Severus counters.

Lily takes a step back and looks around her friend. "Not enough for me to stay in the room while you and Lucius talked" she argues.

"Lily, that was for Lucius." Severus frowns, then holding out his hands he mumbles "I thought he'd be more comfortable talking if..."

"I wasn't in the room" Lily finishes.

"Yes, he hates ssympathy; it's all pity as far as he's concerned." Severus explains.

"Why didn't you just tell me that?" Lily huffs, arms crossing in indignation.

"Right in front of him Lily?" Severus sneers.

Lily seethes for a moment before sputtering "well, yes!"

Rolling his eyes, Severus snarks "That would have gotten him to talk alright."

"You make me so mad sometimes!" Lily shouts.

"And your irrational!" Severus accuses.

Lily opens her mouth to return the insult, when she thinks better of it. "Let's not fight anymore." She decides.

Severus blinks. "Okay" then frowning he murmurs "I guess?"

"Mum might be making lunch, want to go help?" Lily suggests holding out a hand for him to take.

Severus's face briefly lifts in a smile and it makes her insides melt (so darling, Lily thinks, he should smile more). "Ssure" he agrees grasping her hand in his as they head back inside.

* * *

**Thank you for reading, please review! Suggestions, ideas, critisicm and comments are all welcome.**


	18. Poor Little Rich Boy

_**Poor Little Rich Boy**_

* * *

Andromeda takes small bites of the porridge that the elves brought for breakfast and glances about the table in a casual (assessing) way, she finds herself relieved and pleased to find things calm (this is what one would call a _good _meal in the Black household). But, the calmness breaks at the sound of flapping wings as an owl swoops in through the open window and drops a letter in Narcissa's porridge. She cringes as she pulls it from the substance and dabs at it with the napkin from her lap before even attempting to open it. Father's hard eyes are on the younger teen as she reads it;

"Well?" He demands.

Narcissa, always poised, sets the letter aside and looks father in the eye as she answers. "It's from Lucius Malfoy, father," their sire only lifts an eyebrow, looking down to the burgundy table cloth then to her father again she says in a softly tone, "He invited me to a trip to Diagon Alley."

Father's brow furrows and he strokes at his gotee. "You're a bit young for boys yet Narcissa..."

Bellatrix, gaze darting between the two, quickly pipes up, "I could chaperon if you like."

Feeling more and more left out, Andromeda bursts, "If they get to go I should be able to go to!"

Father's fist slams against the wooden table, causing mother to shrink in her seat and the girls to still. "I haven't even said she can go!" He bellows angry at the lack of respect for his 'authority', Andromeda holds back a sneer; a man who wields wand and fists over words is and always be weak in her mind.

Yet, before father can rampage, Narcissa bats those thick lashes over her baby blues and asks in a tiny, sad, (infuriating) voice "Then I can't go...? I heard that Mr. Malfoy's been sick lately, I hoped-nevermind."

Father's intensity lessen and he seems to gradually regain the human in him. "I see," he mutters, "If your sisters go with, I suppose I could allow it." He conceeds and with a brilliant smile, Narcissa leans over pressing an adoring kiss to their father's cheek.

"Thank you father." She gushes, eyes shining with gratitude that makes the man's chest puff out in pride.

"Of course, Narcissa." He smirks and Andromeda finds herself despairing at his behavior, nothing about him's any different that what she remembers from before she left home. He's doting father to Narcissa, authoritarian to Bellatrix, and indifferent to Andromeda; it's behavior like this that had stopped her from having more children, fearing she would turn out like him; or mother, out of depth.

Sighing lowly into her bowl, all Andromeda can think is _nothing, not a **thing **has changed._

* * *

Meeting Lucius Malfoy just shy on noon, he smiles at them and reaches out both hands to take hold of Narcissa's; "I've missed you," he confides in her.

Gaze darting about, she quickly leans in pecking his lips. "As have I," she whispers. They fall apart, only their pinkies hooked as they begin to stroll down the street, they whisper and chatter of things they don't care to tell Andromeda and Bellatrix. Slowly, second by second, titter by titter, Andromeda begins to feel despair and at a loss. Bellatirx, in rare show, hooks arms with her younger companion and with a teasing grin leans in to whisper;

"Ah, puppy love."

Andromeda ends up hiding a snort behind a hand, "puppy love" indeed!

A few minutes later, Bellatrix comments, "Maybe we should find a place to eat, hm?

The two blonds turn, Lucius short and not fully grown into parts of his face nods his head. "Yes, then we can discuss what I really need to talk with you all about." Walking further down the block, they come to a lesser travelled pub and walk in to find it empty of all but the bartender, and a man reading the paper at the counter. Taking a booth, the bartender wanders over;

"What do you kids want?" He asks.

Bellatrix leans her elbows on the table and grins up at him. "Four butterbeers please" she orders.

The man grunts and leaves, the group relaxes and wait in silence until the bartender comes back a couple of minutes later to drop the sloshing drinks in front of them; scowling, Lucius slaps down some knuts as payment and watches the old man count them before leaving the table. Sipping at her drink, Andromeda waits for whatever big news Lucius wants to impart to them.

After downing half of his glass in a fairly undignified way, Lucius exhales a breath. "I went and saw Severus Snape the other day," he begins.

Stirring her finger in her drink, Narcissa glances at her husband and inquires, "How is he? I hope you didn't frighten the boy."

Lucius glares. "He's like _us_" the blond whispers.

Andromeda's go huge. "Really?" She awes in fascination, she knows Harry believed him a hero, but she had her doubts; wouldn't this be the perfect way to find out once and for all?

"Yeah," Lucius sulks, "He's staying with that mudblood Lily Evans."

Andromeda curls her fingers into a fist and Narcissa swats at her husband's shoulder. "Don't use that word," She grumbles, "You'll get the wrong sorts attention."

"_Muggleborn, _then," Lucius corrects with little enthusiasm. "Anyway, I need a way to convince the girl's parents to allow Severus to come stay a week or two with me."

"Why?" Andromeda questions, not following the boy's train of thought.

Lucius rolls his eyes at her. "He was held in not only the Lord's high esteem, but Dumbledore's as well, he's going to know much more than the rest of us;" he explains, "And if we want to stop a war or end it easier..."

"We need him." Bellatrix concludes.

Lucius nods his head. "Exactly," he agrees.

"He's staying with the Evan's? Why?" Andromeda inquires.

Lucius cringes. "I haven't yet heard why," he mutters, "But, I can tell it's not...pleasant."

"How?" Andromeda demands with intensity, not willing to let the subject drop.

Glaring at her, Lucius hisses. "He was bruised, missing a tooth."

The teenager falls back against the booth, eyes wide. "Oh," she murmurs.

Bellatrix pats her hand and asks Lucius a different question. "What do you have in mind Lucius?"

"Hm?" He mumbles around his glass, "Well," He starts after setting his mug down, "I need someone older, someone who can convince the muggles to let Severus comes stay with me for a while."

Tapping her chin in contemplation, Bellatrix asks "What did you tell them before?"

"Said my father's away on business quite a bit and that a maid keeps watch over me most days." He tells the older teenager.

"Maid..." Narcissa muses, suddenly, her face lights up in a brilliant smile. "Why don't you go with him Bella?"

The brunette frowns. "What?"

"You're the oldest of us," Narcissa muses, "Young, but, definitely old enough to pull off being a maid." She elaborates.

Bellatrix squints her eyes. "I have no desire to be something so-_common-_" She spits at her sister.

"Don't think of it that way..." Narcissa begs her,

"We need him Bellatrix" Andromeda tells the older teen looking her in the eye, "Would you let are world fall to _him_ for a second time?"

The glint to her sister's eyes is murderous. "How dare you-"

"Don't fight!" Narcissa cries out.

Bellatrix presses her lips into a thin line, glaring for all her worth at the group before she grinds out "Fine."

Clapping her hands together, Narcissa smiles at her sister. "Lovely!"

Raising his empty glass, Lucius promises, "I'll pay you back in full."

Bellatrix taps her fingers against the table, thinking carefully of what she should ask for in payment. Finally, staring down the younger teenager, she says to him. "I want boots,"

"Done." Lucius agrees.

"_Carla Adeline_ boots" Bellatrix smirks.

The boy chokes, "You're _joking_!" Wide eyed he exclaims "Those are a small _fortune_!"

Tossing her long hair back, Belltrix sticks her nose in the air and sniffs. "Not my problem, you're the one who agreed."

Patting her husbands' back, Narcissa soothes. "At least she's not asking for a robe from _C.A. _too."

"Small miracles." Lucius grunts, falling back in his seat with a pout. Andromeda hides a smile behind a sip of Butterbeer, times like these are precious, far between; however, no matter how hard she tries, she's reminded war looms just outside.

* * *

**This is such a short chapter isn't it? But, I really needed to get something done with so I can force myself to get into the next part of the story. I hope you don't mind (too much, anyway) and I promise the next chapter will be a ton longer. Thanks for taking the time to read this and I hope you'll consider taking the time to review!**


	19. You are the Navigator

_**You are the Navigator who could Never Lead**_

* * *

"Him too, eh?" Regulus awes with large eyes, Bellatrix doesn't stop the quirk of her lips; she enjoys seeing that her young cousin is still inoccent enough to feel wonder.

"Yes, though, I suppose we really shouldn't be surprised," The teenager replies, taking a sip of her tea, she continues, "Out of everyone so far, is Severus Snape truly that much of a shock?"

Regulus frowns, seemingly thinking her rhetorical question over. "How'd Lucius find out anyway? No one would tell me..." He fades off, eyes taking on a brooding shadown as he sinks into his chair.

With a chiding knock to the knees, the boy straightens and Bellatrix clears her throat. "Our dear Lucius thought drinking three quarters of a bottle of fire whiskey was the best way to deal with his problems," she explains, then with a sneering grin, she murmurs, "Let that be a lesson Reggie, don't do anything that could jeopardize us-it's sheer luck that Lucius didn't blow our cover when he visited Severus in his drunken stupor."

The boy nods his head earnestly, Bellatrix thinks it darling. With pondering eyes, the boys says wistfully, "I just wish we knew who remembered..."

Bellatrix looks away, with careful, clipped movements she puts her teacup down and bites. "We shouldn't be wishing for the impossible Regulus," the boy shrinks back with a assenting bend of his head and Bellatrix finds that her stomach churns. She hates lying to him; to _everyone, _but she took an _oath _if she were to break it...she quails the shudders before they can reach her shoulders.

She doesn't like leaving everyone in the open, but...her mind spiraling away into herself, Bellatrix reflects.

* * *

_She expected to wake up burning-or at the very least in darkness-no matter how fractured her mind became, the last of Bellatrix's true self knew with overwhelming despair that she deserved no better (worse, really) than she gave her victims in life. So, waking up in the Hogwarts Express youthful and whole was much more than a shock. Blinking, she lets her eyes rove the corridor, she can almost believe she's on her way to Hogwarts, but...it's too quiet, too still, too cheerless. The brunette makes a move to explore when one of the compartments doors open and a willowy figure of unrealized gender steps into the hall. The being smiles rows of white pearls at her, Bellatrix tenses and waits, raising their arms (as if wishing to welcome her with affection), they approach Bellatrix. She reaches for her wand and they stop, grinning fuller at her, Bellatrix sees how sharp the being's teeth are._

_"Hullo Bellatrix Black," they greet and Bellatrix can't stop the snarl that engulfs her countenance._

_"Where are we?" She demands, pointing her wand at the creature._

_It snickers, though, not mocking or cruel; it only confounds Bellatrix further. "Tell me!" She cries trying to cast a Crucio, but all her wand does is spark and sputter. Gaping at the stick, she lifts her eyes away from it and hisses, "What did you do to my wand?"_

_Gesturing around them, the thing tells her with a satisfied grin. "Your magic doesn't work here, lovely."_

_"What do you mean?" Bellatrix asks in wavering tones, "I-you haven't made me a _squib _have you_?" _She asks hands hiding her ashen face._

_The _monster _laughs, it laughs so loudly Bellatrix fears it's only a diversion; eyes darting about the train, she searches in vain for escape. "Oh you mortals!" It shrieks, "How easily you jump to conclusions!"_

_Thoroughly exasperated, Bellatrix musters her daring and approaches the thing, staring it in the eye (but, oh_ its _eyes, they are white, pupiless horrors)__ as she growls. "Tell. Me. What. You. Want!"_

_Mirth fading gradually, its face becomes haggard as it tells Bellatrix, "I need you."_

_Thinning her lips into a stern line, she questions, "What do you mean?"_

_"You silly creatures are always trying to runaway from fate and this time your kind managed to elude it." The thing imparts to Bellatrix._

_"So?" Bellatrix shrugs, "Why do _I _matter_?_"_

_It sighs and rests its angular cheek in its hand. "How little you think of your worth," it murmurs and Bellatrix flinches, it pays this no concern. "You are an ideal candidate, if you accept that is, but...I need someone inconspicuous to guide fate back on to its path-some points will still be wrong-but-" it cuts itself off abruptly and shakes its head. "Ah, it's not a matter for you to concern yourself with."_

_Swallowing, Bellatrix contemplates what offer is being made to her; maybe..."What would correcting fate entail?"_

_It's eyes alight with something devilish and Bellatrix wonders if she truly isn't making a pact with a demon. "Not much, my dear Bellatrix, I just need you to go into the past-"_

_"I'll do it," Bellatrix agrees with no hesitation, a chance to fix and change is not something to let go of._

_It's eyes widen for just a moment, but then the creature's smiling again, and with pleased eyes it mutters, "How quick you are to accept."_

_"I want two conditions met," Bellatrix tells the thing, "I want to bring others back-of my choosing." _

_It clucks its tongue and seems to consider her deal, finally, it nods its head. "Yes, yes that could be good...but I reserve the right to send more into the fray where I see fit."_

_"Fine," Bellatrix agrees, what else can she do?"_

_Holding out its unworldly hand, the being smirks. "An oath, I shall bind you with an oath..."_

_"What kind of oath?" Bellatrix inquires with distrustful eyes._

_"One that binds you not to speak of any of this, lest you die." It answers simply with an overabundance of truth; (it makes the Slytherin want to squirm)._

_With a deep breath, the girl tries to not lose herself in the implications and accepts the offer, a chance to clear her future of the evil she will commit is to perfect to pass up..."Alright," she whispers and with surprising quickness, the creature pulls out a knife and slices Bellatrix's palm and its own before intermingling the two wounds as it chants in languages unknown to mortal ears. With slow intensity, the injuries begin to burn, burn until she thinks fire's going to sprout from her hand-then as quickly as the heat had come, it was gone leaving an oddly cold feeling._

_"It's done." It whispers._

_"I never told you who I want..." Bellatrix protests as the world around them begins to warp and fade._

_"I already know who your heart wants," it explains._

_"I never got your name..." Bellatrix fades off as the being disappears with the Hogwarts Express leaving her in quickly engulfing darkness._

_Something in the dark glows with frightening intensity and a hoarse voice whispers into her ear, "Some call me God and others...the Devil." Bellatrix shakes in the darkness, dread and fear pooling and mingling as one in her gut; _oh god_...what has she done?_

* * *

"Bellatrix!" Regulus calls to his cousin and with sudden intensity, the teenager is within herself again, blinking shocked eyes at the boy for his outburst.

"It's impolite to yell inside, cousin, Father or Aunt will come if you don't quiet." Bellatrix reprimands.

Scowling, Regulus crosses his arms, "_I _was going to call them, you were-" he cuts himself short, obviously at a loss as to what to say. Grappling for the right words, he breathes "You were _gone, _Bella."

The girl drops her head into her hands and her fingers rake through her dark locks as she exhales a heavy breath. "Some days," she murmurs, "Are just _too much_."

Regulus pats his cousin's shoulder and wonders what's suddenly drawn Bellatrix down, he's yet to see her take anything thrown their way with anything less than perfect decorum and poise. With uncertain and imperfect words, he says to the teenager, "It's fine Bella, it'll all be okay, you'll see." The girl only curls further into herself and voices chatter and giggle as his brother and cousins search them out from their seclusion in the library. Tugging anxiously at her sleeve, Regulus begs, "You have to get up Bella, you don't want_ them _to see you this way do you?"

The girl lifts her head and smiles at him with marrow-deep tiredness, "No I don't, " she agrees and with momentous effort she pulls herself from her crouch and into a stance not unfit for a queen. With a single wink, she puts a pompous smirk upon her lips and opens the room's door and calls out into the hall "Get in here you lazy-bums! We have a great many things to discuss!"

Regulus ponders the idea that, maybe, his cousin is a better actor than any of them ever thought to give credit for.

* * *

**Things are starting to come together a little, aren't they? Anyway, It's been a bit since I last released a chapter, yeah? Well, no matter here it is. I hope you guys liked it, thank you all for reading this and I hope everyone will take the time to drop by and review! :)**


	20. They Say it's What you Make it

_**They Say it's What you Make it, (I Say it's Fate)**_

* * *

Augusta Longbottom-for once-does not wake to a pre-set alarm, but to her son's little hands cupping her face. She smothers the smile erupting on her face and draws her brows together as she squints her eyes open to the warm light of the summer sun and the brilliant smile of her boy. "Hi mum," he greets softly, his askew brown hair and glinting bronze in the daylight's glow, _perfect_, she thinks reaching up to bring her son down for a hug.

"Hello Frankie" she sighs into his shoulder.

"I made breakfast, mum," he tells, her pulling away.

"You didn't have to do that..." Augusta fusses as she pulls her slippers on before rising up from the bed.

"You make me breakfast everyday," Frank states, "It's only fair I make it once in a while." The woman cannot help the rise of maternal feelings as she swoops down showering her only child with a flurry of uncommon affections.

"You are the sweetest boy," She compliments, "You'll make one girl a very happy wife one day."

Wiping away the kisses, the child flushes red and whines "Mu-um! Girls are _boring_, why would I want to make one my wife?"

Eyes alight and smirk teasing, Augusta pretends to ponder this, then with a subtle frown asks with feigned hurt, "Then am _I _boring?"

The boy gapes up at her with eyes aghast. "No!" He cries, "You'll never be boring mum!" He declares, swinging an arm around her waist and his head coming to rest upon her shoulder. Augusta puts her head on top of his, (he's still her baby, her little boy,) it's times like these she knows will make her cherish this second chance.

Walking down the ornate hall arm in arm, Augusta thinks to ask, "What did you make Frank, love?"

"Bacon and porridge!" The boy chirps, gaze rising up for her approval and love, (hadn't another boy done the same?). She smiles at her son, but her gut churns; it seems, maybe she was mistaken, Neville truly did have his father's likeness more than his mother's.

"That's wonderful," Augusta gushes. She keeps up with her son's eager strides and lets him pull out her chair before she takes her seat. Staring into the bowl in front of her, she sees her son made a star of blue berries in the middle and laughs. "Feeling artistic this morning?" She chuckles and Frank grins back warmly, taking her reaction for the approval he seeks.

They dig in, it's not until they both polished off their bowls and only lefts stains where the bacon rested that Frank dares to question. "So, what are we doing today, mum?" She knows he hesitant, so many times her works gotten between them and their time together (not today, she swears).

Patting the napkin from her lap to her lips, Augusta pauses to think, _now's as good a time as any..._she thinks and turning to her son, she says with the entrancing grin, "I thought we'd visit a muggle park, I here they have structures for children your age to play on."

Fred cocks his head to the side-considering-with gradual lifting of his lips, he smiles back. "Yeah, sounds fun mum!" Augusta relaxes, her son, the adventurer, she fondly thinks. Picking her wand from her robe pocket, she waves it silently over herself and son easily changing their clothes for the day to come, her son chortles and Augusta giggles along.

Getting up, she opens her hand to her son and orders, "Come along, I know just where to go." With no hesitation, the child latches on, eyes solely on his mother.

* * *

They land in the green ankle high grass, weeds and bald patches darting the field, but the equipment appears still in functioning order (Augusta releases a held breath at this). Her eyes dart around, hoping to find a familiar red and black head, her hopes are quickly vindicated at the sight of vibrant red flagging through the air as a little girl swings; however, there's no little boy beside her.

The woman frowns and requlenishes her hold on the squirming fingers to see Frank run towards the park with an abandonment she rarely connected with her son. At a more sedate pace, she comes forward, watching Lily turn in her swing to see Frank and with open mouth she breaks her eyes from his to see her further away. Falling from he swing, she stands and waits. Coming up beside the girl, Augusta never lets her focus waver from Frank as he fumbles in his attempts to conquer the ape? Is that it? bars.

Standing side by side, Augusta is the first to speak, "Where's Severus?"

From the corner of her eye, she sees the child wilt and her lip protrudes. "He went on 'holiday'," sneering at the word, she continues, "Bellatrix Black came by last week with Lucius Malfoy saying she was his maid and _Mr. _Malfoy invited Sev to holiday at his estate in the country." Augusta feels her heart pound, what on earth are these children _doing_? Lily doesn't seem to take notice of her change in demeanor as she continues her rant. "But, you know, really they're going to talk and learn stuff that they won't ever tell _me,_" she glances at Augusta contemplatively, then corrects herself to say, "Us, really."

horrified, Augusta bursts, "_Lucius Malfoy_? He was hung as a war _criminal_!"

Lily frowns and with a flick of her hand, tosses her hair behind her shoulder as she meets Augusta's wild gaze dead on. "Who has the right to judge? Severus trusts him-he was a bit weary of Bellatrix, but like I said, he trusts Lucius-besides, Severus is one of our best bets in finding out how this happened; he needs access to a library for that." Lily explains.

Augusta frowns and takes the time to look up and see Frank dangling from a bar upside down, she lifts her hand waving at him and he grins back, "Look at me mum!" He cries, swinging himself up to sit on top of the bar.

"I see," she calls back.

Lily ponders the boy she knew, "He's nine."

Augusta touches her heart and smiles. "Yes," she confirms, "I'm praying I'll treat every moment with him tenderly."

Lily wrings her little hands. "I wish..." she fades off, but Augusta resonates with the pain in her tone.

"You're son was a good man," Augusta tells him, "Showed my grandson how to be brave, honored your's and Jame's memory by naming his children after you, he even named one after Severus, I think."

Lily's lips quirk. "Severus, huh? That boy seems to think everyone hated him," Lily's face morphs to one of unease as she murmurs, "Hate_s _him."

Augusta sighs. "I won't lie and say that man didn't make enemies, and I won't say he was loved...but, he redeemed himself in your son's eyes and in proxy, much of the wizarding world." She tells the young girl as gently as she possibly can.

Lily sniffs. "I let him go, I _knew _he didn't have anyone else..." Her voice ends in a warble and Augusta rests her hand on the child's shoulder as she regains her strength. "But, I didn't think I had a choice." She finishes.

"Oh darling, there's always a choice, but sometimes we just make the wrong ones..." Augusta says.

"I'm not letting him go this time," Lily promises.

Augusta nods her head. "I think," she whispers, "That's a very good idea."

Lily lifts her face up to her, smiling at Augusta like she's the sun, leaning in, she wraps the woman in a quick hug. "Thank you!" She yells and then like a petal in the breeze she's off skipping through the tall grass to her son's side. She stands with her skinny sun-kissed arms tucked behind her back as Frank drops from the monkey bars. She grins at him and on the wind carries her offer, "Wanna swing?"

Her son's face takes on an embarrassed hue, "I don't know how..." The wind imparts to her.

Green eyes vivid, Lily laughs and snags his hand in hers. "It's just like flying!" She declares and her son stares at her with wide eyes.

"Really?" He asks in hushed sounds.

Lily nods resolute, leading him to the two seats, she drops into one and points to the other. "Now, watch me," she orders. Pumping her little legs, the swing begins to rock back and forth. "Now you try!" She tells him.

Frank-always quick to learn-copies her motions until he's sailing in the wind. Lily giggles and she awes more than Frank when she releases the swing's chains to float on the zephyr to the green grass of the ground. Augusta brings a hand to her mouth and tries to hold back the tears in her eyes from falling, innocent magic, how she wished it could always be.

* * *

**Yay chapter twenty! I thought it was time to come back and check on Augusta Longbottom (I've been ignoring her for the better part of a while), but it also has Lily and Frank too, so it's a kind of a cute chapter, isn't it? On to readers and reviewers of last chapter; KodeV, Trapezefixe, Kittyhawk09, Saint Snape, Professor Radar and Madelinta, thank you guys! I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter and will take the time to review (would it be so bad to reach one hundred reviews by chapter twenty one?)**


	21. And The Blood's Run Stale

**_And The Blood's Run Stale_**

* * *

James bounces between his parents as they press through the throngs of people as they come closer to Honeydukes. In a few minutes he will see Remus and everything will be okay again, (no, nothing will be okay again-better-but, not okay). "C'mon mum and dad!" James insists, yanking their sleeves with all his young strength. "I want to get some chocolate frogs!" He declares, grinning up at their exasperated faces.

Father shakes his head, bemused, yet amused. "Just run ahead James-" When the boy eagerly moves to do just that, his father's hand shoots out gripping his shoulder. Leveling his only son with a sharp stare, the man orders, "But, do not leave Honeydukes without us and no talking to strangers, alright?"

James resists the urge to roll his eyes and bobs his head up and down with surprising speed. His mother's lips lift in a happy-bound tilt, "Let him go love, he's practically vibrating." She says softly to her husband. The man chuckles and releases his son to watch in pleasure as a bright whoop sounds from the boy as he darts through the crowd of bodies to reach his destination.

* * *

Remus plods beside his father, the man's eyes shift nervously at all the people and his heavy hand keeps Remus with him (it's painful, but Remus understands). Jutting his chin out, Remus frowns up at his father and offers quietly, "No one even knows who I am dad."

The elder Lupin blinks and glances to his son in an apologetic way. "I know, it's just..." he trails off in helplessness.

The young werewolf lets his shoulders droop, his eyes become wide and sympathetic and like he's done for the entire week and he plays his father. "It's okay dad, if you aren't up to it-"

The man's eyes spark, jaw tightening, he tells his son. "No, we're only a few shops away now, we're going." Remus hides his smirk, in his letters with James he'd been rather struck by their contrasting tactics to win their parents over for a trip to Hogsmead; while he'd been demure-bordering pathetic-to convince his mother and father to take him, James whined and wheedled until his parents gave in with sudden snap of patience.

Seeing the colorful sign, Remus picks up his pace and with excited finger points at the store. "Look dad! There's Honeydukes!" Turning to the man, he asks with hopeful smile "D'you think I could go and look around it on my own for a bit? Find something for mum?"

Mr. Lupin twists his hands. "I don't know Remus..."

"I won't go anywhere else, I'll even meet you at the door when I'm done," he begs.

Remus watches with critical eye as the man's eyebrows waggle in thought before he nods. "Alright, but lets not take too long, okay? Your mother's waiting for us at home." Remus grins and with natural ease slips from his father's weight, rushing into the store.

* * *

"Why are we wasting our time on such frivolities Lucius?" Severus demands with a scowl as he hurries to keep up with his friend. The blond boy smirks at him and slows his gait enough for Severus to catch his breath and take in the elder's delight at his question.

"For one, I told your parents we were going on _holiday_, if you come back more pallid than before, won't they wonder?" Severus's frown deepens and with a concise glance away Lucius adds in a murmurs, "I'm looking to get Narcissa some chocolate flowers or gummy witches hats-she likes those, I think." Eyes surveying the rows and rows of candy.

Severus bites his tongue, lest he make some snarky comment that rubs Lucius the wrong way (it's easier than he remembers), instead, he grumbles, "They aren't my parents."

Lucius tussles his dark locks. "Of course they aren't," he agrees airily. Severus decides he hates him. "You can pick out some licorice wands too, if you want." Lucius adds as they stroll down a row of cansiters, Severus reconsiders his decision, maybe he doesn't _hate _Lucius after all, (just dislikes him, very, _very, _much). Stepping into the shop's center, the boys pause to simply wonder at the atmosphere; it's nothing like they're accustom to.

Drifting from Lucius's side, Severus fights to remember the last time he came to Honeydukes-not since second or third year-coming to stand beside a tower of fizzy cauldrons, he gazes at it with more admiration than he believes possible. Lucius finds his side again, but Severus's contemplative stare never leaves the display. "I could buy us enough to make our own tower." Lucius remarks.

Severus sends the older boy a skeptical stare. "Why ever would we do that?"

Lucius shrugs. "For _fun,_" he stresses, "You're starting to make me think you never had any." He teases.

Severus blows a curling strand of hair from his face. "_Books_ are fun, _potions_ are fun, _purpose _is fun!" He grumbles.

Lucius shakes his head at him, clucking his tongue, he says, "I think we need to find you a youthful hobby."

Severus swings around fully to tell the blond where he can shove _that _idea, when he sees two boys his age; one thin with wispy brown hair and the other with thick glasses on the bridge of his nose, nearly hidden by his mess of dark hair.

* * *

James gapes at the two boys a few feet away, _Severus Snape _and _Lucius Malfoy, _it's not right. He sifts through everything he knows about the two, something Lily once told him comes to mind "_I don't think he visited the wizarding world once before his eleventh birthday, but his mother was a witch..._" He swallows thickly, maybe she'd been wrong?

Remus's trembling voice whispers to him, "Do you see them too?"

"Uh huh." James mumbles.

"They were Death-Eaters, you know." He imparts to James.

At first, the boy doesn't say anything. Instead, James squints his eyes and studies Severus in particular, there's something-different-about him; he snaps his fingers when he realizes it. "He's clean!"

Remus sputters. "What?"

Nudging his elbow in Severus's direction, he comments "He's clean! See his hair? It _curls_."

Remus glares at him. "Yes, because that _matters _James!" He seethes.

Grabbing the werewolf's wrist, James shakes his head. "Look, just follow me okay?" He orders and without doubt, approaches the two Slytherins.

Smiling at them, James chirps, "Hi!" Severus and Lucius frown at him in identically distrustful wary ways. Shifting between his feet, James looks to the ground and then back at them. "Um, I'm James!" He introduces holding out his hand.

Neither of the boys take up the offer.

"You could be polite you know!" James snaps, quickly riled.

Severus sneers. "Why should I be polite to the likes of _you_?"

"Severus!" Lucius rebukes, snagging the boy back. "We are here to get some treats for Narcissa, not to start fights."

Severus turns on the boy with a fierce scowl. "Oh shove it Lucius! Like you wouldn't do the same if _Weasley _was here!"

Lucius shoulders seem to drop and his eyes take on a haggardness James thinks looks unfit on a boy his age's face (but he wears the same) "I'm tired of fighting." He utters.

Some of the anger in Severus dissipates, but envy glows in those shadow eyes. "I wish I felt the same."

Lucius gives the younger child a rueful grin. "I don't think you do," when Severus's lips twitch in protest, he quickly continues to say. "Losing the will to fight doesn't always mean peace, Severus." Ever thoughtful, Severus's eyes burrow into their depths; Lucius relaxes and takes the time to take stock of the two younger boys. "You're a _Potter_, right?" The teen demands, but he doesn't wait for the child to answer before commenting, "I know _you _know I'm a _Malfoy,_" Chilling his gaze, he studies Potter and Lupin with seemingly disdainful eyes. "So, _why _have you come to introduce yourselves?"

James mouth moves without speaking, finally, he starts "I-"

"James!" A man belows, swiftly approaching the little group. Lucius's heart hammers and he pulls his young friend behind him.

Jame's pupils dilate and he looks up at his father with big eyes. "Yeah dad?"

"What are you doing?" He growls.

The boy doesn't speak for a moment, his eyes shift and land on the display. "...was looking as the cauldrons and then I met Remus!" He declares gesturing to the sickly youth, "Then they came over!" He concludes gesturing to Lucius and Severus.

Potter's father's stare rakes over Lucius and Severus, (he tries to hide the boy, some of Prince features are simply striking and he fears they'll be easily spotted). Warily, the man asks, "Where's your father Lucius?"

Pulling on a gentile smile, Lucius answers, "Father was feeling under the weather, just me today."

The man casts the dark head peaking around him a curioser stare. "And the boy?"

Bringing him forward quickly for presentation, Lucius declares. "A friend of father's from abroad came to visit, this is her son, Severus Evans." Severus tenses and Lucius hears James Potter choke and Remus Lupin's breath hitches.

Severus plays coy and darts back behind Lucius, one hand twisting in the back of his robe. The senior Potter casts Lucius and the other boys an odd glance, but seems to accept the answer. "I see, tell you father I hope he feels better." The man murmurs and then reaching around, grasps his son's shoulder pulling him around.

The boy yelps. "Dad!"

"Come along James," his father sighs, briskly putting as much space between him and Lucius.

Severus, runs away from Lucius. "Severus!" Lucius snarls, half-heartedly reaching for the younger boy, but Severus has already reached the Potters. Tugging Mr. Potter's sleeve, Severus waits for the man to glance at him.

"Yes?" The older male inquires suspiciously, smiling a gape tooth smile, the black-haired boy presents a square of paper to the man.

"You're son dropped this," he tells him.

His gaze meets his son's and the senior Potter prompts, "Well? Are you going to take it James?"

The boy sends Severus a baffled look, but takes it with little hesitation. "Sorry, dad." He mumbles snatching up the paper. With a sufficient nod, Severus drifts back into the thickets of people and finds his way back to Lucius.

Snagging the older boy's robe, he waits for Lucius to acknowledge him. "What did you do Severus?" The blond exhales.

"I simply made sure he knows how to reach us." Severus replies, Lucius settles him with a sharp gaze.

"You're certain then?" Lucius demands.

"I _know,_" Severus answers smugly.

Lucius doesn't say anything, praying that his young friend's right.

* * *

Finding his father, Remus watches from the corner of his eye as Lucius and Severus bring their purchases to the counter and wonders just what Severus gave James. Looking away, he sees his dad's smiling face. "Find something good?" He questions.

Lifting his lips in a grin, Remus nods. "Yeah, a tin of chocolate frogs! All of us can have some." He tells his dad presenting the little package.

"Good choice," the man agrees seriously, holding out his hand for Remus to take. "Let's check out, yeah?"

"Uh huh!" Remus chirps, suddenly, an arm bumps his and he looks to see Severus's black eyes.

The smaller boy leans in and whispers, "We'll be in touch." Remus bites his lip and begins to fret, he doesn't know what Severus is playing at, but Lucius calling him Severus _Evans _must mean something, right?

* * *

Eyes flickering to his father, James sees that he's not paying attention to him any longer. Pulling out the little piece of paper, James unfolds it to find a single message scrawled across it;

_If you know what I think you do, I suggest you write to Malfoy, he'll be able to get you in contact with the rest of us._

James rereads it at least ten times over, he can hardly believe it, but...he hopes that this will bring him closer to seeing Lily and Sirius.

* * *

**This is a pretty long chapter (in comparison to the last couple chapters, anyway)! I hope all of you enjoyed reading it. Was it good? Was it bad? Does it need improvement? To readers and reviewers of last chapter, KodeV, Trapezefixe, Kittyhawk09 and Madlenita, thank you. Thank you all for reading this chapter and I hope everyone will please consider leaving a review! :)**


	22. Interlude: Fool no More

**_Fool No More_**

* * *

Filius Flitwick-even with his small stature-can intimidate others when it suits him and as he walks in to the Great Hall to See Horace pale and jittery in his seat, he knows this would be one of the times he would need not only his cleverness, but intimidation too. Approaching his colleague, Flitwick feigns more concern than he feels at the moment to inquire, "Are you alright Horace?"

Dabbing at his brow with a handkerchief, the man answers with a weak smile. "Once I can have a bit of a talk with Dumbledore, I think I shall."

Flitwick, though, does not agree. "No, no, why don't we take a visit to Pomfrey? You look very sick my friend." He tells him, trying to convey only earnestness in his words.

"It's not like that..." Horace trails off.

"I insist" Flitwick urges; he knows from the nervous glint in his eye, that Horace won't refuse his next request. "Let me accompany you." He implores.

Horace is quiet, gazing on perturbed. "...alright," he agrees. The rest of the staff watches on confounded as Flitwick and Slughorn stroll out of the Great Hall, once outside of the dining area, Flitwick reaches up and jerks Slughorn into a side corridor that he knows is nearly devoid of portraits. Flitwick keeps the hold on Slughorn's elbow as he dashes his eyes about the hall seeing movement in one frame and a snoozing wizard in another. It's important nothing is overheard, casting a quick muffaliato charm which causes Slughorn to gasp.

"That hasn't-"

Flitwick is quick to cut the sentence short with a curt nod, "I know."

"You too then?" Horace inquires, some of his tension draining away and a hopeful glint coming to his eyes.

"If you mean remembering, then, yes." Flitwick replies, staring up at the man with a critical gaze.

"I don't understand..." The rotund man mutters, "Why ever would we end up here?"

Flitwick rolls his shoulders as his mind runs through countless possibilities; however, no matter the conclusion he draws, Flitwick can only answer the question with guesses. "Who knows? Not me." He finally answers the Potion's Master.

Slughorn, with bleak eyes, opens his hand as if to snatch some reason from the air. "Do you think it's just us?" He whispers, paling to white, he murmurs, "What if someone _dangerous _remembers? Ooooh what if a student-"

"Stop it Horace!" Flitwick shrills, "Do _not _think about any of it, you'll drive yourself mad."

Stretching and pulling at handkerchief from his pocket, the larger man sighs. "I know," he mumbles.

Running a hand through his dark strands, Flitwick opens his hands up; begging the man to see as he does. "Students will be here in a matter of a week, we need to go on-behave as we always have-if we raise any suspicions..." the little man trails off, too numerous are the ways everything could go wrong.

"Yes, but what of Dumbledore? Surely he could think of something?" Slughorn frowns, staring down at his elfin companion.

"No," Flitwick answers in clipped tones, "You weren't there in the later years Horace, Dumbledore...he allowed a lot more danger in Hogwarts halls than he should have, let more people takes falls and hits then needed...I don't want to know what he would do if he learned of our memories." The man explains.

Slughorn blusters and puffs. "Say now, Dumbledore is not a bad man-"

"I know, just failable-one track mind-really," Flitwick quickly soothes, not wanting to lose allies in this coming nightmare; "He's not a villain, he's just as good as you or I, but the way he goes about things...it's not always with the individual in mind." Flitwick elaborates with gestures and pointing. Slughorn's mouth is a thin line, his hand scrubbing his chin in his contemplation. Flitwick waits, holding back any breath, may it shift the winds.

"I understand, I can see your point-and you're right, I wasn't there in the later years-I'll trust your judgement-for now." Slughorn relents with escape plan ready if Flitwick turns untrustworthy.

Relaxing marginally, Flitwick makes a point of smiling. "Thank you Horace." He says with great enthusiasm.

The man nods and returns the grin. "Maybe we should have some Fire Whiskey back in my rooms?" He offers, "Speak of things to be done, precautions?" He offers.

Flitwick considers this, it's a sound idea-better-in fact. "Yes, I shall join you." He concurs.

* * *

A portrait frowns, the buzzing that so suddenly occurred, now gone and replaced with jovial chatter of the portly and tiny professors. He's never witnessed anything like it, a new spell perhaps? Definitely a useful one, if so. The Headmaster should be informed, it's a curious spell and even curiouser for the professors to have need of it. Flitting through empty frames, the stately man eventually enters the Headmaster's study.

He sees the old man pouring over stacks upon stacks of papers, scratching his quill here and there, pushing his spectacles up occasionally with his thumb. Anxiety plaguing him more by the second, the portrait makes point of coughing. Expectedly, the professor's face lifts from his work.

"Ah, Sir Arthur, what can I do for you?" He implores with benign smile and tired eyes.

"I just want to inform you of something curious I've witnessed." He informs Dumbledore.

The man's eyes twinkle brightly. "Why, the student's aren't even back yet!" He chortles.

Sir Arthur tries not feel irritation at the wizard's light-heartedness, for he doesn't know yet of what he's seen. Allowing the man's laughter, Sir Arthur responds, "It's about the professors, the small one-Flitwick?-and the Potion's Master." He explains to the man.

Setting his quill aside, Dumbledore leans in. "Oh?" He murmurs.

"Yes," the portrait agrees, "They were acting strangely, then the small one muttered some spell and all I could hear after was a buzzing sound." He explains.

Dumbledore's knarled fingers clasp together as he trains his eyes on the portrait. "Truly? Do you believe it was because of the spell?" He questions.

Sir Arthur contemplates this, slowly, he answers. "I don't know why else I would hear such a sound."

Dumbledore hums something low and eager. "Thank you Sir Arthur, I shall look into this." He says to the portrait.

Sir Arthur bows. "Always at your service Headmaster." He vows and with a proper nod makes his way back to his frame.

Dumbledore picks up his quill and stares off into the distance. "Interesting," he murmurs, "how very interesting..." his voice fading off and the scritch scratch of his quill of takes over.

* * *

**This is more of an interlude than chapter, but it's setting up some majorly important stuff for the future, so I figured it'd be okay if this one was a bit lacking in length. I hope no one's too upset, we'll go back to the regular characters next chapter. Special thanks to reviewers of last chapter, Kittyhawk09, Madlenita, Trapezefixe and KodeV I couldn't do this without your comments and feedback. I hope everyone's enjoying this so far and will consider reviewing this chapter/interlude.**


	23. We all Want Someone to Hold in the Night

**___We all Want Something to Hold in the Night_**

* * *

Lily strains and bounces under her mum's grip on her shoulder, she knows she's being utterly childish, but she can't bring herself to care because _Sev _is coming back to her. Pushing up on her toes, Lily cranes her neck to see around the throngs of people and with a giant grin she catches sight of a boy her size with hair as black as hers is red mimicking her actions.

Pointing through the people, Lily shouts, "There they are!" Ad with a final twist from her mother's hand, races across the station to meet her very best friend. "Sev!" She shrieks, tackling the boy to the ground in her exuberance.

"Umph!" Severus yips and the blond boy and brunette teenager stare down at them in a mixture of hilarity and disgust. Patting his friend's back awkwardly, Severus murmurs to Lily, "I wasn't gone _that _long."

"That's easy for you to say," the redhead grumbles into his shoulder.

Sighing, Severus squirms to get out from beneath her with a promise. "Look, I know you're not happy, but...I have something for you."

Pulling off Severus, Lily falls back to rest on her knees. "What did you get me?" She asks half-curious and half-excited. Turning his back on her, Severus rummages in the little suitcase mum had bought him for the occasion. A minute later, he holds up a miniature golden Eiffel Tower and a letter sealed with-James, James wrote her!

"We _did _say we were going to France after all," He smirks and then glancing to the letter, he tells her quieter, sadder, "I suggest you read this when you're alone."

Reaching for the presents, Lily cradles them close to her heart and breathless, questions, "Then he...?"

Severus nods his head. "Yeah," he mumbles, "Yeah he does."

Tears building in her eyes and working her mouth tirelessly to find the right words for Severus, she abandons her things with a clammer to the floor in favor of wrapping her arms around the boy in yet another hug. "Severus, _Severus,_" she utters, "How did I ever live without you?"

A wiry-if not bitter-smile sneaks up on Severus's face. "I don't know that you want me to answer that question Lily," he replies.

Lily retreats at this, eyes seeking and desperately trying to convey all that she knows she can't make up for. "You're right, I don't." She decides to say, "But...maybe, this time I could make it up to you? Prove to you I'm worthy for you to call me a friend."

Severus opens his mouth a stubborn furrow to his brow that Lily knows to mean a row is to come. "Lily-"

Lucius picks up the treasures Lily dropped in favor of Severus and eyeing them, he clears his throat. "You're mother and father are storming over here, neither looks quite pleased with your conduct."

Lily's green eyes grow bigger and she mutters, "Uh oh."

Hands on her hips, Mrs. Evans narrows her eyes at her youngest daughter. "It's more than 'uh oh' missy," she hisses.

Up in a flash, Lily's throwing herself at her mother's skirts with a cry. "I'm sorry mum! I just got _super _excited and-"

"You're old enough to know not to run off like that." Mother rebukes, half-way through Lily's excuse.

Playing contrite, the redhead lowers her gaze to her feet and pokes her mother's foot absently. "I am," she agrees.

Her mother exhales and with a strained voice, she grumbles, "We'll overlook it for right now, this _is_ the first time you've been away from Severus since..." since he came to their home in the middle of the night, since he killed his mother, since Lucius came to visit.

Mr. Evans gives his attention to Lucius and his "nanny" and anxiously, he inquires, "I hope Severus behaved himself."

Bellatrix is slow to smile, but when it comes, it's warm and sweet as honey. "Oh yes, a perfect dark-haired angel." She announces reaching out to pat Severus's head in the most patronizing way possible. Lily sees her friend's teeth grit and sees the merry twinkle in both Lucius and Bellatrix's eyes, Lily knows the pair are joking, but she hopes Severus does too. He's not always the best at separating joke from seriousness, she thinks it's because he's so stern.

Some of the tension fades from her parents taller forms and mum reaches out to take Severus against her. "Did you have fun Severus?"

Muffling his face in her side, Severus mumbles what Lily presumes to be, "Yes."

Glancing at a delicate watch on her wrist, Bellatrix pulls an apologetic face and tells the Evans, "I'm sorry, but Lu and I need to get going, his father expects us to meet up for lunch in an hour."

Mr. Evans waves a hand and smiles, "We understand, you kids get along." and with fake bustle, the two teenagers pick up their luggage and hurry towards the exit, but not before Lucius calls to Severus.

"I'll write you! Okay?"

Glowering in the pairs direction, Severus grunts, "Fine." Though, Lily doesn't think Lucius really cares if he has Severus's consent or not. Strolling out of the train station, Lily perks up in question and with her face upturned to her dad, she asks,

"Can we get ice cream?"

The man's eyes crinkle and then he grins. "Why not? It can be our homecoming gift for Severus."

Lily cheers and reaches over snagging Severus's free hand. "Here that Sev?"

He let's his eyes flit up in the briefest of smiles, "Yeah, ssounds good." He says, but Lily can see he's somewhere else; somewhere so deep in that head of his, she fears irrationally for a moment she'll never get him all back. But, that's silly, no one ever discards parts of themselves inside their heads.

* * *

"Tell me!" Lily demands, bouncing on their bed; though, it will be _their _bed only for a few more weeks she guesses, mum and dad have been looking into four bedroom homes closer to London and dad; he's been looking for jobs in and around London too. Lily can't say she's too upset about the upcoming move, she doesn't think she can pretend to be friends with little girls she barely remembers and Severus...it'll do him some good to put distant between him and Spinner's end.

Severus smirks at his friend. "Why should I?" He drawls, eyes flashing with unusual mischief.

Lily pouts, falling down to her bed. "C'mon Sev!" She moans, "_I _know _you _know that _I _know you're planning something big."

Severus barks a laugh, "Hardly! All I got from Lucius is that he's planning ssome hush-hush meeting for all us time travelers."

Lily huffs a lock of red from her face. "That's something, isn't it? Did you learn anything else?"

Severus shakes his head, eyes taking on a sad hue. "That's the thing Lils, _nothing _like this has ever _happened_."

Lily feels panic scrabbling for perch in her mind. "Nothing?" She repeats, "Not one story?"

Severus sighs and looks away. "No, not one." He sounds as desolate as Lily feels.

Licking her lips, Lily tries a new approach, "Okay, did you figure out how many of us are back then?"

Severus's tongue darts out from the gap where his tooth used to rest-Lily's heard her parents talking, as soon as they move they're taking him to a dentist-"We can't be certain; however..." He trails off.

"What?" Lily urges, leaning in close.

"It's a fairly large bunch, us, Mrs. Longbottom, Lucius, the Blacks-ssisters and brothers-Potter and Lupin." He rattles off, his face darkens next, Lily knows he's going to make a very serious point. "There could be more of us-no, I _know _there's more-and not all of them...not all of them are going to be on the same side as us Lily."

Lily puffs her cheeks and rolls her eyes. "I could have guessed that Sev!" She grumbles.

Severus's hand takes hers and with so very serious fathomless eyes he utters, "No, Lily, you _wouldn't _you are far too trusting, too kind, What if Pettigrew has his memories? Do you not think he will try to worm his way into your affections again? He'll throw you to the _dogs _if he thinks it'll ssave his hide."

Lily bites her lip and glances away, "Does he?"

Severus frowns, "He what?"

"Remember." Lily murmurs.

Severus relaxes, "We don't know, but I have my doubts."

Lily takes Severus's loosening of his shoulders as cue to smiles. "Okay," she exhales feeling marginally better. A minute later, puckering her lips, the redhead thinks to next inquire, "Do you have any hunches about anyone else?"

Severus pauses, eyes darting around the room systematically. "No, but we've been reading the papers-magic and muggle-for people who've gone off their rockers and are raving about the future. Lucius promised to find ssome way to take a look at St. Muggo admission records too, see if anyone's been admitted for a break with reality or insanity."

Lily makes a noise behind her teeth. "That's a good idea, actually," she comments, rewarding Severus with a wide smile.

The boy, though, doesn't smile back. "Are you ever going to read that letter?"

"Hm?" Lily hums, "Oh, from James," she realizes with sudden clarity (fear). "I will, but James has never been a good writer, so I don't know how much I'll actually get from it..." Squeezing the hand still holding hers, Lily whispers, "Besides, _you _are here, not James."

Severus's features thunder. "What of when James comes? Will you abandon me in favor of his presence?" He snarls.

Lily gasp taken back. "No!" She shouts, "Haven't you hear me? I want to be _friends _with you again! Better than before even!" She cries, "Sev," she whimpers tearful, "I'm not going to leave you like that, not again."

Severus gazes at her with the tenderest of anguishes. "Lily," he murmurs, "I loved you, loved you even after you died so I could devote myself to ssaving the sson that was more your husband than you, but Lily..." he averts his eyes, "Lily, I _know _you, you'll go back to your husband and slowly are relationship will strain; then you will be outside my grasps once more." He finishes, not bringing his stare back to hers.

Eyes the fiercest they've been since her death, Lily snatches her friend's chin between her fingers and demands he looks at her. "_Look at me_ Sev," she says in a voice quiet, but bellying something far stronger, "I-I really was a prick when we were kids, I let you go and then I married James...but, oh Sev! I don't know if I go back to James..." She admits this with her arms in the shape of an invisible cradle (an empty one), "Sev, we had a _baby_ and now," tears spilling down her cheeks she chokes. "I don't know that I could ever be that close to James again because-because I don't think I could create another child together perchance it will be torn from us again." Pain and snot thick on her face, she gazes at Severus with verdant eyes too close to shattering for his liking. "I don't know that I have the bravery to dare for us to try and be a couple again."

Voice hoarse and throat dry, Severus remarks, "You don't think James will just give up do you?"

Smiling through her troubles Lily laughs and shakes her head, "No, he's too stubborn for that; however, I do think he'll see how much it hurts me-he never could stand to see in pain-and he'll back off, maybe, he'll even find someone else in the in-between."

"You're far too optimistic when it comes to that man." Severus glowers.

"And you too pessimistic!" Lily counters, wiping the tears and snot away, Lily pats their bed and implores, "Lay down with me?"

Severus bites back a sigh and nods. Linking hands as they have done every night before, the pair lay their heads down on the virgin white pillows and try to find rest in the restless sleep they know is to come.

* * *

**You know how some things are just impossible to figure out? Well, Lily's one of them! I know we actually haven't gotten much on how Lily feels about James, but I think she'd have trouble wanting to be close with him again because she's scared she'll have him (and maybe children) ripped away from her a second time. So, if you can't tell, at this point, I'm totally incapable of deciding if Lily wants James or Severus (because they both want her). So, I'll leave it open and let you guys argue your pros and cons about either relationship to me until then. **

**And on to reviewers and readers of the interlude, KodeV, Saint Snape, Kittyhawk09, Madlenita, and AvadaK3 thank you guys a billion times over. I hope to hear from everyone this chapter; suggestions(i.e. who should the next chapter's focus be on?), comments, ideas and criticism are all welcome. Thanks for reading everyone! :)**


	24. I'd Like to Believe in all the

**_I'd Like to Believe in all the Possibilities_**

* * *

"Sirius!" Regulus shouts, running down the long expanses of halls. "Sirius!" He yells again, stopping suddenly to peer out a large bay window. Outside, he sees Sirius; the older boy has a beater's bat in hand and seems to be hitting bludgers. Sighing in aggravation, Regulus rushes to the window and unlatches it. Pushing it open with a bit too much force, the frames rattle and Regulus pauses for a moment to stop them before screaming, "SIRIUS!" His brother spasms and a bludger lands on his foot, Sirius howls in pain. "Uh-oh." Regulus whispers, a great deal paler and more fearful than before. Backing away from the window, Regulus runs for the parlor.

"Mother! Father!" He calls, "I think Sirius broke his foot!" He runs, and when he gets to the darkwood door, he hesitates to knock. "Mother!" He calls again, a moment later, the door swings open nearly clipping the small boy's nose.

Glaring down at her son, Walburga Black hisses. "What is it Regulus?"

"I think Sirius's foot's broken." Regulus whispers.

Her eyes widen. "How?" She demands.

"I, um, I startled him and a bludger he was hitting fell on his foot and-" His mother shoves him out of the way and turns her head back.

"Orion, your son's foot is broken." She tells him.

"For the love of-" He growls, getting up from the parlor couch he slams his teacup down, nearly breaking it in the process and stalks out of the room. "Where is he?" He asks, stalking past his wife and son.

"Outside where he likes to practice quidditch." The woman says to her husband following right behind him.

Regulus watches for a moment before hurrying to catch up. Stalking down the halls, Orion grumbles, "We'll have to go to St. Mungo's, for the fourth time this year."

Wringing her hands, Walburga frowns at her husband's back. "Yes, well," she mutters, "It's not like we can fix his foot on our own."

"I know that!" The man snaps, turning on his wife.

Rushing around his parents, Regulus runs out one of the house's many doors and looks to find his brother out on the lawn. Seeing Sirius on the grass, Tears streaming down his flushed cheeks and lips a bloody red; the younger boy feels terribly guilty. "Does it hurt a lot?" The younger brother asks, kneeling down beside Sirius.

"What do you think!?" Sirius snarls, "My foot's bloody smashed I bet!" He growls at his brother.

"Sirius!" Both children turn to see their mother and father heading straight for them. "You haven't moved, have you?" Walburga asks.

"N-No," Sirius warbles, tucking himself in a smaller ball.

"Good," she breathes, taking out her wand she casts a single spell, "_Ferula*._"

Sirius immediately stops sniffling. Their father comes up beside them and murmurs, "good boy," to Sirius as he plucks him from the ground. "Come along." He says, giving his wife and youngest son a pointed look. The two of them latch on to him and with a side-long apparition spell, they are gone.

They arrive in the middle St. Mungo's reception area, a young witch behind a desk looks up from her work and sees them. Getting up, she blinks. "What brings you here Mr. and Mrs. Black?" She asks.

Holding out Sirius, Orion answers. "Our son dropped a bludger on his foot."

She signals for a healer and comes over to cluck at Sirius's injury. "Poor boy, that must really hurt," she sympathizes.

Sirius, limp against his father, cracks an eye open and smirks weakly. "It bloody well hurt, it's smashed after all."

"Sirius!" Walburga rebukes as the woman's dark brows rise sky high.

"Sorry ma'am," The injured boy apologizes instinctively. Watching, Regulus sees the older boy scowl after and his eyes cloud over as he closes himself off in his mind. He wonders what's set him off, was it the chiding? Or that he responded to it?

A healer now hurrying over, looks them over. "What seems to be the problem?" He asks.

The nurse answers. "Mr. Black's son dropped a bludger on his foot."

The healer winces. "Ouch," he mutters. Then, shifting to a more professional assessment, he tells Regulus's parents. "We'll just take a look at that foot, but I think a dose of Skele-Gro and he'll be good to go home-with a pain reliever of course."

Taking the family to an examination room, the healer pushes back his sleeves and says to their father, "Set Sirius on the bench, will you?" Orion nods and puts his son down, briefly running a hand down the child's back before going to take a seat beside his wife and youngest child.

Coming up to Sirius, the healer vanishes Sirius's shoe and sock. "So, kiddo, how old are you now?" He asks as he gently begins to prod at the bones.

"Nine, I'll be ten this year." Sirius grits as the man pokes at a particularly tender spot.

"Merlin, I think you shattered most of your big toe and fractured the rest." The man mumbles, "Just how far did this bludger fall?" He inquires.

"Three? Four feet maybe." Sirius answers, squirming as the man begins to move on to his foot.

"I think we'll have to vanish his toes," the healer sighs, waving his wand, he then says, "his foot seems to have a fracture; but, I think that can be handled just by keeping him on crutches." The healer explains to Walburga and Orion.

"How long will he have to stay off that foot?" Walburga inquires.

"I'd say six weeks." The man mutters. "_Ossio_ _Dispersimus_**," he whispers, Sirius yelps at the new feeling but seems more fascinated then scared by his floppy toes.

Walking back to a cabinet, the man takes a Skele-Gro potion from it. Coming to the dark-haired boy, he pops the lid and pours him the correct dosage. "Take that for me, please."

Sirius crinkles his nose. "Here I go," he exhales, downing it down in a breath. "Yuck!" He sputters.

Everyone in the room grins (even if father and mother hide theirs behind their hands). "Here's some juice." The healer says giving the boy a new cup.

"Thanks," Sirius sulks.

Turning to his family, the healer explains to the Blacks what needs to be done for the next few weeks and then shaking their hands, allows them to go.

* * *

"Sirius?" Regulus whispers, coming into his brother's room.

"What do you want Reg?" Is the slurred call.

Shuffling in, Regulus looks at all the tall and long shadows gliding around Sirius's walls and with a pang of irrational fear runs at his brother's bed, jumping on.

Sirius hisses. "What's with the jumping you prat?" He snaps at his brother.

Curling in on himself, Regulus mutters, "Sorry." Looking towards his brother's form, he whispers, "Sorry about everything."

The older brother sighs. "I know you are Reg." Shifting, he asks, "What got you so excited this morning anyway?"

Perking up, Regulus crawls over to his brother's side and reaches into his robe pocket. "This!" He exclaims, holding out a letter.

Snatching it from the smaller boy, Sirius strains his eyes to read it in the darkness. "Oh wow, didn't think I'd see the day where _Lucius Malfoy _invited _me _to his house." He chuckles and Regulus grins.

"Yeah, but he's the only one without any parents around, you see? So that's the only place we can all go." Regulus explains, reaching out to take back the invitation.

"Where are his parents?" Sirius inquires.

"Dead." Regulus frowns, "His father died shortly after we all ended up here; or that's what I think Bella said."

"You shouldn't trust Bellatrix." Sirius sighs, "How do you know she wasn't lying?" He demands.

Regulus scoots away from his older brother. "How do you know she _was _lying?" He grumbles, "Just because _you _don't like her, doesn't mean she's a bad person."

"She killed me!" Sirius snarls.

A breath leaves Regulus all in a gust. "Oh," he utters.

"It's a little more than oh, you little prick." Sirius snaps.

"She's not the same now," Regulus argues, "I _saw _her, she's different." He mumbles.

"You tell yourself that," Sirius huffs, "And when she kills _you, _know that I _did _tell you." He tells Regulus, turning away, the older boy curls in on himself. Regulus stays beside his brother's stiff form for a long while after, lost in a sea of confusion, doubt, fear, and sadness. _Nothing can ever be simple, can it?_ He thinks gloomily.

* * *

**This is just a sort of get back into the swing of things chapter, I should probably be more sorry that I haven't updated in so long, but...anyway, it's a chapter that's setting up things to come and hopefully in another chapter or two all the kids will finally meet up. **

**To reviewers of last chapter, Madlenita, KodeV, Professor Radar, Kittyhawk09, Saint Snape, Trapezefixe, Eclaire Stones, and Ibjw0128 thanks you for reviewing and I hope I'll still hear from the majority of you this chapter. Thanks for reading everybody and please review! :)**

***Ferula is a healing spell used to bind and splint broken limbs.**

****Ossio Dispersimus vanishes bones.**

**P.S. I have a poll for what Rise of the Guardian One-Shot I should do next on my page-if your into that fandom, that is (I've certainly gotten into these past few months).**


	25. Hanging on the Hope for Better Times

_**Hanging on the Hope for Better Times**_

* * *

She stares unblinking at the ceiling, she can't sleep; can't even close her eyes. Head lolling to her left, she catches glimpse of her bed companion in the light of the stars' nightglow. His face isn't peaceful (she wonders, has it ever been?) it's taunt even in his slumber and his breath isn't the deep full body encompassing movements of a relaxing sleep, but the shallower ones of a person on the edge of a nightmare. She lifts a hand and puts her warm fingers to his cool jaw, some of the tightness around his eyes fades and she can hear the distinct grating of his teeth fade away. Pulling her hand away she stares at it, how wondrous the touch of another is; how healing.

If Lily can make it past her seventeenth year here, she thinks she'd like to be a healer this time. Slowly rising up to a sitting position, she glances once to Severus before reaching over to her bedside table and opening the drawer. From it, she pulls out the unopened letter Severus gave her just yesterday. She gazes at the seal, it's the crest of her husband-the one she claimed as her own upon their marrying. Fingers tracing the familiar shapes, Lily smiles slowly; she still loves him. How could she not? But...her gaze shifts to Severus and fixes on him; who needs her more? James or Severus? The man who did his best to give his wife and son a chance to escape? Or the man who ensured up to his death that the last bit of what she loved on the living earth survived to live and flourish? It's hard, if she'd been asked before her death who she'd choose no matter what, she would without hesitation say James. Now? She can't choose, it'd tear her up inside until she was nothing more than a quivering mess incapable of speech let alone deciding.

Fingers tracing the lip of the envelope, Lily pauses before forgoing care and tearing it open in her eagerness to see what her husband wrote.

_Lily,_

_I'm so sorry, I'm sorry all of this happened and that I couldn't save you or Harry and...there's so many things I want to apologize for; even for being a jerk to the greasy git_ (Lily bites back a sigh at this, she doesn't appreciate the name calling; but she knows even though James matured past hexing and fighting people, insults are still acceptable as far as he's concerned)._ in school when you were friends with him. You deserve better than me, than what you got; god Lily, I can't tell you how horrible I feel about everything. I know I'm no good at writing-you always told me so, but I want to make it up to you, alright? Look, Malfoy's hosting a meeting for all of us in the coming month; I'll start making it up to you then by apologizing in person._

_Until then,_

_Love James_

Lips struggling not to pull into a frown, Lily dabs at her eyes with her nightgown's sleeve. "You stupid boy..." she whimpers.

"Lily?" A voice mumbles from beside her, Lily curses at herself then; she should have known she would wake Severus.

"Yes Sev?" She whispers.

Lifting his head from his pillow, his eyes glitter at her in the darkness. "You read the letter didn't you?" The paper trembling between her fingers, all she can do is nod; not wanting to start sobbing. He sighs and scoots close to her. Eyes flickering over the moving writing, he snorts. "You're right, he's even less eloquent in pen than when he speaks."

"Shut up!" She snaps. Severus blinks at her, his body hunching in some. Miserably, Lily puts the letter aside and leans her head on the boy's shoulder. "Oh I didn't mean it, I'm sorry..."

His hand briefly rests on her shoulder. "It's fine," he mumbles, "After all, I should know better; you love _him_."

"He loves me too, you know," Lily reminds him.

She feels him sigh more than hear it. "I know," he agrees, "That jabber makes it clear enough."

Lily tilts her head up and looks at Severus. "You...You love me too, don't you?" She whispers.

His eyes are old and sad. "Lily, when haven't I?" He counters.

The girl flexes her hand, after a moment of thought she puts it on Severus's. "I love you too, you know," she whispers, "But, I love James also."

Pulling away, Severus slips from the sheets to move to the window. "You can't have us both, Lily." He reminds her.

Miserable, Lily drops her stare to her lap. "I know," she utters.

Not looking away from the window, Severus speaks, "Lily, I know this is hard for you; but, if you choose him again, it won't end my world. I've lived through it once, I can do it again and besides, who's to ssay we'll all even make it to the point that we can do anything with your decision?"

"Don't say things like that Sev," she begs, "I hate the thought of losing anyone again."

His sharp eyes penetrate hers even in the dark. "Sstop being afraid Lily!" He nearly shouts, "Figure out what you want and take it!" A hand running through his hair he exhales. "There's no time for indecision, not here" he breathes.

Lily, though, disagrees. "I can't just make up my mind here and now!" She counters, "I can't do that to you or James, I'm not going to leave one of you out in the cold; especially not you, Sev." her nose scrunching in a funny way, she looks about the room decorated in pastels, the doodles of a child and stuffed animals. "_God _Severus we're _nine, _we have nearly two years before we even go to Hogwarts!"

The boy by the window looks to his hands. "We _aren't _children," he mutters, "and that's why _this _is a problem."

Feeling much calmer than a moment before, Lily smiles. "It's not like I can marry either of you-let alone have sex...I don't think I could even do more than kiss you without feeling like a sicko." She tells her friend. "You may not think I have time to decide what my decision will be, but I _do,_" She says with great emphasis, "And in the end, that's all that matters."

Severus scoffs. "My god, you're sso young," he mutters.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lily demands.

Eyes harsh, he snaps, "You sso sself-centered; not even thinking about _Potter _and I, what do you think dragging this out will do? Do you think it will breed friendship? Cooperation?"

Deflating, Lily turns away and flops back to the bed. "I can't make this choice now Sev," she warbles, "Don't make me."

Severus's eyes consider her, "Alright Lily." He finally says, coming back to the bed and crawling up to rest beside her. "I know I have only sso much time with you before Potter's narcissism takes up all your attention," Lily purses her lips at the words and wants to argue James is a good man, a good father, but she knows to Severus's eyes he likely never will be anything but the bully James was in his youth.

"I'll always have time for you Sev," she promises, "I'll make sure of it."

Severus murmurs something too low for her to hear, she strains her ears and ends up catching the last of his words, "-too optimistic..." Lily ponders this, maybe she is being too hopeful; but, one of them has to, right?

* * *

**Hey everyone! I know I did a Lily and Severus chapter just a bit ago (and this one's also rather short), but I practically ignored the letter James gave Lily in the chapter and I wanted to expand a bit more on it. The next chapter will be on someone we haven't focused on in a while-Remus Lupin (I'm ninety-nine percent certain)! Thanks for the reviews, Blackphoenix23, Totalreadr, Flame55, AvadaK3, Trapezefixe, Saint Snape, Kittyhawo09, and KodeV. I hope you're all enjoying the story so far, thanks for reading and please review! **

**P.S. I'd really appreciate if I could have 135 reviews by next chapter :)**


	26. Darling, This is no Joke It's

_**Darling, This is no Joke; it's Lycanthropy**_

* * *

Remus watches with vacant eyes as his father packs an overnight bag; tonight's the night, the night he becomes a monster. Seeing the man fold up a second shirt, the werewolf wonders if his father isn't feeling extra guilty this month and will stay away not one night, but two. He thinks of his mother-tears silently slipping from the tip of her nose into her cold tea. A spark of fury ignites inside him, flourishes into an all-consuming rage. Stomping through his parents doorway, he goes to the bed where his father's bag lay and tosses it to the ground.

His father freezes. "Remus-"

"NO!" He shouts, "I'm tired of you always leaving!"

His father's hands begin to tremble and it's only a matter of time before the shirt slips from his fingers. The man's brow takes on a sweaty sheen. "Remus," he croaks, "You know why I can't stay."

Frustrated and seething from not five years of anger, but over thirty, the boy shakes his head. "That's not good enough any more!" He cries, "Just-just because you feel _guilty _doesn't mean you get to leave mum all alone!" Lip trembling as he fights not to sob, Remus utters, "It doesn't mean you get to pretend I'm _normal_; 'cause I'm _not _and I'm tired of thinking there's something _wrong _with me!" He's crying in earnest now and he can hear mother on the stairs, through his tears he sees father get to his knees and reach out to lay one of those large hands on him when his mother's voice cuts through the air.

"Don't touch him," she hisses, her shoes click on the floorboards and soon her arms are scooping him from the floor; cradling him.

Arms instinctively wrapping around her neck, the boy wails into her shoulder. "I'm _not _a monster!" He whimpers, voice muted by her floral print dress.

"Never," she swears, soothing him with the warm anchor of her hand on the back of his head playing with his tawny strands; he hears her say, "I think you should leave, Jonathan."

He can hear his father sigh. "Okay," he whispers and with a soft pop, father's gone (who knows how long).

* * *

The afternoon leading to the full-moon, is quite possibly one of most uneasy since his first transformation. Playing with the soup in front of him, Remus chuffs a breath and plops his elbow on the table so he can rest his chin on his fist. Mother, from across the table looks up pointedly from her book. "You need to eat Remy," she reminds him.

Sulking, the youth barely spares his mother a glance. "I'm not hungry," he mutters.

He hears her exhale, "You know it goes better when you eat your meals."

Nastily, Remus chooses to throw away the side-stepping. "You mean when I wolf out?" He demands.

Mother pauses, face taking on a look of hesitation and no little worry. "I-yes," she agrees.

Looking up, he looks into his mother's umber eyes and tells her, "You shouldn't have told him to go," mother opens her mouth; Remus doesn't let her speak. "I mean, it's not fair he gets to just play make believe that I'm _normal, _while you're stuck here listening to it all."

Mother looks at him in a sad way. "Darling, you're father feels guilty about it all-"

"Of course he does!" Remus shouts, "But, he shouldn't! It's not like he knew that lunatic would bite me!"

Lips tight and shoulders raised, his mother makes a point of turning a page in her book. "Yes, but that doesn't stop a man from feeling guilty," she counters.

Slumping back, the werewolf's eyes rove over his mother; trying to find some explanation. "Then why do you stay mum? Why do you stick through his all alone when he gets to disappear?" He asks.

Eyes trained hard on her novel, she murmurs, "I'm your mother, Remus," slowly looking up, she imparts, "_I'd _feel guilty if I wasn't here to suffer through it with you-in fact, I feel guilty that I can't take your place."

Remus drops his gaze to his now cool soup, "I'm sorry mum," he whispers.

She reaches across the table and puts a hand on his shoulder. "It's okay, my little wizard." The boy manages to smile at the woman.

* * *

Waiting in the darkness with only the moonlight for company, his heart thuds heavy in his chest. Remus feels the change begin; he feels the way his bones curve and stretch, the way his skin taunts and pulls; it hurts, _hurts so much_! And he doesn't even have the Wolfsbane potion to take the edge off, nor to maintain that glimmer of humanity in the beast that is his werewolf form. Soon, (far too soon) all he knows is the instincts of an animal that only wants to hurt, maim and kill...

"Remus," a voice whispers, "Remus, my boy, wake up!" They exclaim in hushed tones, a hand gently shaking his sore shoulder. He groans and curls in on himself. Leave him be. Leave him to die peacefully. "Okay," the voice mutters, "I guess we'll just do it this way." Something's thrown over him and arms then lift him from the ground, cradling him.

He catches whiff of spearmint and ink; the scent of his father. Eye creaking open, he sees the shadow-cast face of his father above him. "Dad?" He breathes.

The man's teeth glow white in the sparse light. "It's me son," he answers.

Fingers tangling in his father's shirt, Remus says with no little awe, "You're here."

"I thought about what you said, Remy," he explains, "I-" he stops and Remus watches with impatience as his Adams apple bobs, "I saw it was hurting you and your mum more that I was gone."

Feeling amazingly proud and relieved, Remus closes his eyes and rests his head in the crook between his father's shoulder and neck. "I love you, dad," he proclaims, drifting back into sleep.

Waiting anxiously by the kitchen window, Samantha Lupin wrings out a dish towel as she waits for her husband to reappear from the shed with their son. Glancing out for the hundredth time between doing the dishes, she sees her husband with Remus in her arms; but-there are tears on his face. The dish in her fingers slips and shatters on the floor; however, the woman doesn't care. Running from the house, she screams, "Jonathan!"

The man looks up from their son's face, he's mildly surprised; yet, smiles brilliantly at her. Confused, Samantha stops short and waits for her husband to come to her. A moment later, he's standing just inches from her; their bruised and battered son in hand. "Sam," he whispers.

Reaching out to brush his wet cheeks, she demands, "Why are you crying Jon?"

His eyes fall back to their son and she wonders if she wasn't wrong-what if something _is _wrong with their son? Carefully hugging their boy close to him, Jonathan continues to smile. "Oh Sam," he mumbles, "He said I _love _you dad..." Samantha parts her lips, but doesn't say a word. When _was _the last time her son said I love you to Jonathan? She can't remember...before he was bitten? After? It was a long, long time ago. Looking at her with eyes gleeful and stated, Jonathan remarks, "I want him to say it again."

Placing a hand on her son's cheek and her other on her husband's shoulder, the woman doesn't lie. "Then you have to stop hiding-taking the cowards way out," she tells him, "You have to show we're a united family and that it-that it doesn't _matter _that he's cursed." Sucking in a breath, she whispers, "That _you _love him no matter _what._"

Her husbands stares at their son a long time. "I'll try Sam," he declares, "God I'll try."

* * *

**First, super special thanks to KodeV who prompted me to write this chapter; you suggested this in a review quite a while ago, if you don't remember. How did I remember this suggestion? I didn't, I was looking back at past reviews for inspiration and I found it and scrapped the Remus chapter I had and did it all over again with this in mind. So, anyway, what do you all think of this chapter? Is it good? Do you think the family dynamics are realistic? Or does Remus come off as too old? Or is he okay because we all know he's really a thirty-something, so it's okay that their dialogue comes off as mature and that his parents don't worry about _that _issue (because his lycanthropy is a way more important issue than a change in maturity). I'm thinking we might just jump right into that meeting chapter I've been building up for a while, but, I also feel like I need to come back to James-or should I just start the meeting off with James as the focus? Give me your suggestions and advice! It's truly helpful, I promise! Also give me advice for how you think the meeting should play out-I have most of it sketched out, but fresh ideas are always awesome.**

**Well, that was long, anyway, thank you, Awesome, KittyHawk09, Saint Snape, Bookivore (clever penname), Professor Radar, KodeV (thanks again!), Very Small Prophet, Madlenita, and Eclaire Stone for all of your reviews and support! :) Thanks for reading everyone and I glad to say we reached my goal and hope to meet my next one of 145 reviews by chapter 27!**


	27. The First Stone is Cast: Part One

_**The First Stone is Cast: Part One**_

* * *

James wakes up to tapping at his window. Scrubbing an uncovered eye, he squints towards the pane of glass to see an owl waiting for him. Yawning, he fumbles his way off his bed and to the window; opening it up, he gets a Chocolate Frog card and scrap of paper dropped into his unprepared finger. The owl hoots once and is off once more. The messy haired boy narrows his eyes at the slip of paper, but can't read the careful cursive; grumbling under his breath, James hurries to his beside table and puts his glasses on. He nearly does a double take on what he reads.

_One thirty tonight, the word is time turner_

Mouth open, he feels a shiver run through him and he can't say if it's from joy or fear; but, James does know the anticipation is already crippling him. Scurrying to get dressed, he puts the card in his back pocket and whistling jovially heads down stairs for breakfast. In a matter of hours, he'll see his best friends and wife again (everything will be perfect).

He spends the day more or less wandering from activity to activity-start in the library, move to running up and down the halls, next to the kitchen begging for a snack, finally to the back yard to mess around with his broom and then back to the beginning again to repeat. Mother and Father, while a bit bemused; seem happy to see him so hyperactive. It reminds him then that he had been that way once-on the move, chattering, smiling...being apart of the war had changed that; he vows to be that way again.

* * *

Getting up from bed, James dresses; he doesn't think of his parents just down the hall or that at any time they could wake up and check up on him only to find him gone. Walking over to his desk where he left the Chocolate Frog card, he picks it up and stares down at the snoozing face of Bowman Wright*. Looking to the clock sitting at an odd angle in one corner of his desk; he watches the clock turn from one twenty-eight to one twenty-nine. Only a minute more. Taking a deep breath, James slips his glasses on and squeezes his eyes tightly shut (it helps when traveling by portkey, he's found). A moment later, he feels the familiar tugging at his belly-button and prays that this _will _end well and not be some terrible mistake...

When he feels the spinning and pulling stop, he's immediately knocked to the ground. "Ah!" He cries, struggling against the larger body.

"What's the word?" Is the demand he gets.

Squinting an eye open, he sees Lucius Malfoy-the most dignified of _dignified_ glaring down at him with askew hair and flushed cheeks.

"Time turner!" The bespectacled boy shouts and after a quick study of his shocked face, the blond gets off and dusts himself off.

"I apologize," he murmurs-not sounding sorry in the least, "But, I needed to jump you before you could do anything, you see?"

James scowls, "Oh yeah," he sneers, "Couldn't of just used some detection spell on me? I bet you know enough."

The older boy glares down at him. "_My father _hasn't done any magic in months, don't you think the ministry would be a little miffed if they detected magic all of a sudden in the middle of the night no less?"

Head whipping around, he only sees the Black sisters. "I-your father? He's _here_?" He whispers.

The other roles his eyes. "_No, _he's _dead." _The teenager growls.

"Oh, um," James sputters incapable of finding the right words, but it seems unimportant because suddenly, _Lily's _in front of him...with a dark shadow behind her.

Face green, James wife (can he still call her that?) utters, "I think I'm going to be sick."

A hand over his mouth, Snape steps beside her and mutters something that sounds like, "me too."

Sighing, the oldest Black sister steps forward conjuring two trash cans for the duo-which, earns a glare from Lucius, he might add. The boy and girl fall to their knees at practically the same time and begin retching only seconds apart. By the time they finish, it's the black-haired boy who speaks first. "I _hate _portkeys."

Miserably, Lily wipes at her mouth and nods. "I know," she agrees.

"Lily...?" James tries taking a step towards her.

The redhead looks his way. "James," she greets, a hesitant smile on her face. Yet, before another word can be said, Remus pops into existence.

Eyes landing easily on James, the werewolf grins, "Hullo James, been a long time hasn't it?"

the bespectacled boy tilts his head. "It has," he concurs, his own mouth lilting up.

A few seconds later, Sirius is there, his brother clinging to his robe. "Get him a bucket!" Sirius shouts, shoving his brother away.

Bellatrix once again rolls her eyes and levitates one of the buckets to the white-faced child who promptly pukes his gut out. Wand tapping her chin in contemplation, the oldest amongst them mumbles, "Maybe portkeys weren't the best option."

Lucius gives a bit of a shrug. "Please," he drawls, "Like you had any better suggestions."

She scowls at her once-brother in law and banishes the two buckets. "Instead of being petty," she grits, "Why don't we get down to business?"

"But-" James starts, but Malfoy, two of the Black sisters and Snape send him scathing glares.

"I don't want this turning into a free for all before we have a _civil _discussion about what we are to do!" Bellatrix snaps.

Sirius, rebellious as ever, starts a dissenting cry. "Sod off, Bellatrix! Who put you in charge!?"

Feeling a bit of confidence return, James joins in his friend's argument. "He's right, you know," he says in empathetically.

Teeth baring in a snarl, Bellatrix falls back into a couch and declares, "Alright then, if you don't think _I _should have any authority in this, why don't we put Severus and Lucius in charge, hm? They _are _the ones who put this together."

A mulish glint comes to the eldest Black brother's eye, but Lily decides to speak up. "She's right," Lily comments, "They _did _put this together, I've watched them send letters back in forth for nearly a month...and the older of you are going away to Hogwarts in a matter of days." Eyes slowly coming to rest on each one of them, (longer on James and Snape out of everyone), she explains to the gathered youths, "We _need _this to go well, set a plan in action; because it will be infinitely harder to do anything once you lot are at Hogwarts."

Looking to the black-haired boy beside his wife from another life, he sees him looking at Lily almost fondly. It makes his blood boil and James nearly lashes out just then-even takes the step towards him; however, Lily's eyes quickly find him and flash with great warning as she purposefully takes Snapes hand and leads him towards one of the scattered sofas and armchairs. Watching the pair settle into the seat, their arms even _touching _James wonders if he's lost his wife-if he ever _had _her.

"Sit down," the redheaded girl orders and with some mild grumbling, everyone does so.

Appearing mildly impressed, the boy beside _his _Lily begins, "Now, what I want to know is what day-or night everyone arrived here on.

Malfoy is the one to speak first . "July eighteenth, the day my father died." He answers and this is the same date everyone else gives.

Studying them curiously, James is sure he can see something fast and frightening happening in the other boy's shadow-eyes. "Is there anything ssignificant about that date _other _than Lucius's father's death?"

"Oi! What happened to you Snape? Lisping now?" Sirius shouts from across the room a rather pleased grin on his face.

James face quirks in a smirk and looking to Remus's direction, he sees the other shaking his head. Something dark and nasty overcomes Snape's face. "Sev..." Lily hisses, hand laying gently on his arm; yet, the other shakes it off and approaches the oldest of the two Black boys.

Holding his breath, James watches with rapt attention as the black-haired git leans in close to his best mate's face. "You think it's funny, do you _mutt_?" He seethes, "Would you think it sso funny if you knew _how _it happened?" He demands.

"Severus!" Lily snaps, the boy looks towards the girl and Lily's eyes soften infinitely. "You don't need to tell him," she begs, "He doesn't deserve to know."

Eyes glancing between the still smirking boy and his childhood friend, he considers her words. "Maybe," he agrees, "I've told you your sson was protected by me during his time at Hogwarts," What? Harry had _lived_?! Maybe everything hadn't been for naught after all? Or, at least James hoped so. "But, did I tell you who cared for him before Hogwarts?"

The blood leaves Lily's frightened face. "I-no," she whispers.

The skinny boy's gaze turns far away. "He was raised by Petunia and I had thought-hoped that he had been as sspoiled as his glutton of a cousin..."

Tears leak from Lily's eyes and James remembers with coming clarity something his wife once told him about the sister that refused to show at their wedding.

_"Why won't she come? Didn't you want her as your bride's maid?" He asked confused._

_He watches his wife look away and naw her lip. "I had," she whispered, "But, Tuney hates magic, you see..."_

Sweat trickling down his collar, James waits with gut clenching fear for the Slytherin's next words. "But, my hopes and beliefs were proven wrong in the face of his memories; do you know what I ssaw?" He hisses, "I ssaw a loveless life! Maybe not one that left him battered and broken-like my own. But, do you know how he sspent his first eleven years? He sspent them thinking there was no good in the world! That he was nothing and would always be nothing!" He roars.

A finger raising in accusation at the slack jawed Sirius, James feels sick to his stomach. What's Snape trying to get at? Isn't what he just said bad enough? What else could he possibly say to make it worse? Glaring hard at Sirius, the black-haired youth reveals the worst thing James has ever heard. "If he had been a normal orphan, not the famed boy-who-lived, he could have easily turned into ssomeone like me! Ssomeone even worse! Maybe even ssomeone like _Voldemort_!"

Lily's hands are covering her mouth and Sirius looks to deeply stunned to do much of anything, but not James. No, he's absolutely _furious_; he has no right! None at all to say his son could have ever, _ever_ become someone like that _monster! _Rocketing from his seat, James gives a battle cry and tackles that greasy git where he stands.

* * *

**Wow, this is the longest chapter I've done in quite a while! I hope no one's too disappointed with where I've ended this. As I began writing the meeting I decided I would split it between two chapters. I also hope everyone liked my characterization of James, he doesn't seem OOC does he? And what of Severus? Do you think he's being too open or his riling proclamation well-fitted to his personality? So, anyway, thanks to Wckd19, Mother of Tears, KodeV, Lupinesence, DarkPhantom101, Madlenita and Eclaire Stone for the reviews! I always appreciate hearing from everyone and learning what they think and liked about a chapter :)**

**I hope to hear from all you guys this chapter and I'd really appreciate if we could be at one hundred and fifty reviews next chapter, okay? Thank you for reading and please review!**

***A famous wizard who invented the Golden Snitch**


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